Is being friends with exs taboo?

[Ni****]

Hello yall. I have never stayed friends with any exs and i bet you can guess my stance. They are an ex for a reason. Is being friends with an ex or exs and/or sleeping with one or more ok single or not? For me its very confusing and i am not able to understand the reasoning.
Lets say you were told by someone to potentially meet that they visit a friend same day every week and then later after seeing you for awhile tell you they are an ex and they sleep together every week is that deceit out of selfishness?

[An****]

Depends of the bond they had or the cause you finish with them. I've one of my ex as a friend and we talk, play and enjoy as normal friend because we finish in a good mood and was mutual. But most of the time is difficult. Everything depends of both

[Deleted Member]

Depends on the situation and the relationship and emotional maturity of the people involved

[Ni****]

7 minutes ago, Andraiel said:

Depends of the bond they had or the cause you finish with them. I've one of my ex as a friend and we talk, play and enjoy as normal friend because we finish in a good mood and was mutual. But most of the time is difficult. Everything depends of both

How does that affect when you meet anyone new for fun or with meaningful intent of a relationship that is to last?

[Brendavis]

Regardless of how it ended, it's not okay. It ended for a reason. It's time to move on and not hold on to the past.

[ex****]

It truly depends on the circumstances and the relationship. I have an ex that is married who I still hang out with sometimes platonically. I also have an ex that I said I would never talk to again, and I haven’t.

[Ni****]

9 minutes ago, kalima said:

Depends on the situation and the relationship and emotional maturity of the people involved

Do you mean emotional maturity of the one omitting or the one receiving half of the truth?
For a me emotional maturity was needed in the relationship. Parting and not speaking again doesnt say not mature to me but you had your chance and failed. Mature for a me is being able to withstand the tug of going back to what was a problem prior. If NSA is the goal do it to it and all you like...however is it mature to sleep with an ex and lie to someone new you want as well? Isnt that called selfishness and misleading?

[Ni****]

4 minutes ago, exotic_arbitrage said:

It truly depends on the circumstances and the relationship. I have an ex that is married who I still hang out with sometimes platonically. I also have an ex that I said I would never talk to again, and I haven’t.

No answer needed but to the Self...does the husband know and if not do you think he should even if withheld? Lust and love are very different. Intent is absolutely definitive of portraying what ones moral fiber is made of. When you get into a new LT relationship would you tell them who you are fully in doings or not? I mean finding someone with like likes is paramount but folks arent always open, honest n willing

[Ni****]

My direct instance is accepting her being single and mingling. I was told 2 playmates she had n id be 3rd. No prob. Then it was told they are exs. Then i was told she doesnt want to see them any longer but one messaged her so much and made her cry while in my bed and a numbers she didnt know callled who was the guys *** talking ill the last day of weekend together. She asked if id mind if she left and of course not i respect you need a moment. Well she left and the next day slept with the guy. That is hurtful when LT was given know? Is it cheating?

[Mo****]

Im friends with a lot of my exes, but if I got a new partner and it made her uncomfortable I would stop

[Ni****]

3 minutes ago, Mokink50 said:

Im friends with a lot of my exes, but if I got a new partner and it made her uncomfortable I would stop

High five. To each their own and ive been in playful relationships. Not fully open but where nights weren't boring

[Fu****]

Depends.
Im still in contact with an ex who, if I treated her like she treated me, id be in jail, but we have a shared doggy. I suppose its even more complicated if you have kids. But it depends on how the split happened.

[Ni****]

39 minutes ago, Brendavis said:

Regardless of how it ended, it's not okay. It ended for a reason. It's time to move on and not hold on to the past.

Im of the same feelings. This is why communication and honesty are key. With oneSelf foremost and then you can comfortably be you around others

[ex****]

32 minutes ago, NightHawk72 said:

No answer needed but to the Self...does the husband know and if not do you think he should even if withheld? Lust and love are very different. Intent is absolutely definitive of portraying what ones moral fiber is made of. When you get into a new LT relationship would you tell them who you are fully in doings or not? I mean finding someone with like likes is paramount but folks arent always open, honest n willing

Yes, communication is open there. And as I said, it’s hanging out platonically. Some exes should have been friends to begin with

[Ni****]

2 minutes ago, exotic_arbitrage said:

Yes, communication is open there. And as I said, it’s hanging out platonically. Some exes should have been friends to begin with

My bad bro. Anyone ive not been with over 6 months i dont really consider. Having feelings of actual love quickly would make that a different stance though.

[ex****]

4 minutes ago, NightHawk72 said:

My bad bro. Anyone ive not been with over 6 months i dont really consider. Having feelings of actual love quickly would make that a different stance though.

I was with her for three years and have known her for more than a decade. Feelings of actual love are often best represented as friendship. For example, we went on short hike, swam with some harbor seals in the bay at the end of the trail, then did a tarot reading

[Zis]

Is it taboo? No.
Is it dumb? Hell yeah!

[Ru****]

As long as it’s healthy, it’s healthy. I don’t even think it’s dumb. I’ve had something dates I went out with had fun. We realized we didn’t vibe the way we want to vibe and we’ve been great friends for 10 years. I have like three of those just because the physical relationship is over, you can still like the person and make the person taboo that they’re an ex.

[Zis]

10 minutes ago, Rugger1967 said:

As long as it’s healthy, it’s healthy. I don’t even think it’s dumb. I’ve had something dates I went out with had fun. We realized we didn’t vibe the way we want to vibe and we’ve been great friends for 10 years. I have like three of those just because the physical relationship is over, you can still like the person and make the person taboo that they’re an ex.

Thats not the definition of an ex, that im thinking off. Im talking about the person you shared over a longer period of time your life with. People i met for one date or two are acquaintances.

[or****]

Can’t be friends with an Ex. Short for Exit away from that girl/boy or Man/Women

[Deleted Member]

Im poly, I have lots of exes that are now just friends lol

[Zis]

1 minute ago, Firewolf00 said:

Im poly, I have lots of exes that are now just friends lol

Again, good argument for a diffrent topic

[Deleted Member]

1 minute ago, Zis said:

Again, good argument for a diffrent topic

Fair enough

[re****]

Not at all. You desired them hopefully for more than their body and… sometimes they’re genuinely good people. But romance isn’t pure for everyone and the frequency of what is "normal“ is fluid. So be friends with your ex. If the sex is good, go there too! Life is too short to have arguments over nonsense.

[Sm****]

I'm friends with all my ex's. They were all really good people when I dated them or I wouldn't have dated them in the first place. If you don't attack each other for your differences on the way out it isn't too hard to stay friends.