Hi there, I'm a co-dependent nerd with train-bound wanderlust and a fetish for sex workers, I also have a lack of social skills which I shall prove by continuing to talk.

I shall hereby clarify the aforementioned points, in reverse order since the last probably sounds worse than it is. One of my happy life memories is going to the kebab van with a friend about three months after she had a baby, before she got pregnant the guy at the kebab van would flirt with her and give her a free drink and extra chips. This was the first time she'd been back. Flirtation was light but she still got the free drink and extra chips. After we're out of ear-shot she punches the air and proclaims "YESS! I STILL GOT IT!" with the most satisfied grin on her face. Me, being an empathic sort, shared her joy. What does this have to do with sex work you're wondering? Well, she was also a cam-girl. I'd often crash at her place when she was working, obviously she had good nights and bad - on the bad nights she'd want a reassuring cuddle (which was why she wanted me), on good nights she'd come bouncing out of the bedroom with that same re-assured joy. By strange coincidence another of my friends was a stripper who also got similar joy from her work. Alas both got married and moved far far away and frankly I miss this particular form of shared smut-tinged joy. I should have just left it with 'fetish for sex workers' shouldn't I?

Item Two: Train-bound wanderlust. I'm from Reading. Depending on the time of day it can take up to two hours and multiple buses to get from one side of town to the other, and at the end of it all you're still in bloody Reading, which is a level Hell I don't feel I've yet earnt. The same activity conducted via train however can get you to countless nicer towns several counties away. I like this concept on a deeply spiritual level.

Item Three: Nerd. I'm kindof torn about mentioning this as my best friend is oblivious to all things nerdy, so it's not like I need someone to be a nerd to form a deep connection. (But if you are: I'm a Ravenclaw, my favourite Enterprise is Andrew Probert's original Enterprise-C design and despite being old enough to know better the Clone Wars is my favourite Star Wars era.)

Item Four: Co-dependent. I wouldn't have said I was the most needy of chaps, but I find the solitary life utterly soul destroying. If a friend asked to see me right now I could be on a train to go see them within the hour and would likely stop off at several shops for groceries etc on the way without a second thought. But nobody want's to see me today so I just ate a tin of ravioli for breakfast because apathy prevents me nipping to the local shop for bread and milk even though I'd be there and back inside of ten minutes.

Item Five: I should maybe warn you now I'm an oversharer