Personal details

Gender Woman
Age 35
Status Not single
Zodiac signs Sagittarius

About me

Interested in:

I’m looking for:

Description

After meeting a Dom who sparked my interest in BDSM I am wanting to learn the rules, try new things but in a controlled and safe manner.
My Dom is a very patient man who is still testing the waters with me. And so far our interests are in line with each other's.
I am still making mistakes but as they are learning curves and He knows I don't know enough to know differently I'm not being punished, as such (I'm sure delays to our first scene are some form of punishment, not really, )
As I develop as a sub I will update this bio so any advise I'm given is appropriate to my situation.
Thank you for taking the time to read this.

Fantasies

A definite bottom

Fetish.com gives you…


Many possibilities! There are plenty of ways to meet new kinksters. Check out our free BDSM dating. Still not convinced to meet in person? Take a look at some kinky discussions taking place, right now...

Pampered
icon-wio Pampered wrote something in the forum
  • 11.08.2018 18:56:46
  • Female (35)
  • Wakefield
  • Not single
Confused newbie

That's what I found in my research too. That a good scene is one where both feel they could have gone further.

Pampered
Confused newbie
Ok so some of you have already read my previous questions and I played my first scene last night.
With this being my first ever scene I was expecting to be instructed by my Dom on positions and what his instructions meant etc. (We had already agreed safe words etc)
Then taught what would invoke Read more…punishment etc. enjoyed some play, with a mild amount of pain.
Though I felt completely safe and was not pushed to do anything I came away from the session...I don't know feeling a bit meh.
We didn't do anything that I was expecting (the first bit above) I don't feel like I served Him properly.
I even asked the question after the session if I was his first sub (which I wouldn't mind as I would be more than happy to learn together). He told me I'm not but he didn't come across as confident in instructing me. Does that make sense?
Because I've researched the scene before giving over to it have I done more harm than good?
I did make sure we discussed the session after and told him what I thought of the session. He took that to mean I was uncomfortable with what had happened... Even though I wasn't.
What should I do next? I'm keeping the conversation going so that I can serve him the way he wants (and still get my own requirements met i.e. safe play where I'm pushed and can explore this side of my sexuality)
Did I do something wrong? We're my expectations unreasonable/ wrong? Should I give over and let him lead me the way he wants and forget about sub poses as He doesn't require me to be in them?
It's this usual?
I'm so confused.
LikeBigPolly · 6 Replies
LordLeofric
LordLeofric Like, others have said, it sounds like you are on different pages. If I was you, I would 1) consider each other’s general ’love’ languages. Use this to communicate more effectively. 2) consider if the specific activities you engage in are too self gratifying for the Dom. In my relationship Read more… both of the above mean the erotic activity is not purely physical, but becomes mutually engaging mentally. In your situation, it may be your Dom is to narrow focussed, and not keeping up with your pace of understanding.
Like · 12.08.2018 0:35:57
Pampered
Pampered ➦Pampered quote Fenrir:❝Firstly, if I may, a question. Was he aware this was your first ever scene? If so, maybe that contributed to how he was with you & your feeling a little deflated if that is the correct term.❞
Yes, he knew it was my first scene. And that makes sense.
➦Pampered quote Read more… eyemblacksheep:❝sometimes it takes a few scenes for momentum - it's always better to not overstep the mark and come back for more, then him overstep the mark and you not wanting to do it again.❞
That's what I found in my research too. That a good scene is one where both feel they could have gone further.
Like · 11.08.2018 18:56:46
eyemblacksheep
eyemblacksheep sometimes it takes a few scenes for momentum - it's always better to not overstep the mark and come back for more, then him overstep the mark and you not wanting to do it again. sometimes it takes a few scenes for momentum - it's always better to not overstep the mark and come back for more, then him overstep the mark and you not wanting to do it again.
Likekelvinsinghand 1 more… · 11.08.2018 18:04:14
Pampered
Menstruation question
This is a weird question but I thought you guys best placed to answer.
What happens when a sub is on her period?
This month I'm delaying my period so I can fully participate in a planned session.
But does the play stop if it's that time of the month?
MissTillysue
MissTillysue I guess its pretty much down to individuals. Some women want more attention during their period some cant bear to be touched. Also for some men its a huge turn on others not so much I guess its pretty much down to individuals. Some women want more attention during their period some cant bear to be touched. Also for some men its a huge turn on others not so much
Like · 19.09.2018 12:30:09
Shaggygrey
Shaggygrey ➦Shaggygrey quote VictoriaBlisse:❝I think it might depend on the play planned. I have done various scenes whilst on my period, mostly impact play and some wax play. I think it's something that you should discuss with your play partner. ❞
If dom is wearing tampon I don't mind still orraly serving her she can still grind my face and lea e awsome friction burns leaves three day tingle. Especially if she have few day grow. Yes I'm different ➦Shaggygrey quote VictoriaBlisse:❝I think it might depend on the play planned. I have done various scenes whilst on my period, mostly impact play and some wax play. I think it's something that you should discuss with your play partner. ❞
If dom is wearing tampon I don't mind still orraly serving her she can still grind my face and lea e awsome friction burns leaves three day tingle. Especially if she have few day grow. Yes I'm different
Like · 16.09.2018 12:30:29
kinkygal40
kinkygal40 No thanks as a woman No thanks as a woman
LikeFirewitch · 23.08.2018 0:39:54
Pampered
icon-wio Pampered wrote something in the forum
  • 04.08.2018 11:19:35
  • Female (35)
  • Wakefield
  • Not single
Newbie looking for advice

I suppose it is strange.
We've known each other years in other capacities. It is a recent thing for us to be intimate. It is a more recent thing for the Dom/sub part to develop.
Does that make more sense?

Likeeyemblacksheep, callipygian · Jump to discussion
Pampered
icon-wio Pampered has updated their profile description
  • 04.08.2018 10:03:17
  • Female (35)
  • Wakefield
  • Not single
After meeting a Dom who sparked my interest in BDSM I am wanting to learn the rules, try new things but in a controlled and safe manner.
My Dom is a very patient man who is still testing the waters with me. And so far our interests are in line with each other's.
I am still making mistakes but as Read more… they are learning curves and He knows I don't know enough to know differently I'm not being punished, as such (I'm sure delays to our first scene are some form of punishment, not really, )
As I develop as a sub I will update this bio so any advise I'm given is appropriate to my situation.
Thank you for taking the time to read this.
Pampered
icon-wio Pampered has updated their desires and fantasies info
  • 04.08.2018 10:03:17
  • Female (35)
  • Wakefield
  • Not single
A definite bottom
Pampered
icon-wio Pampered wrote something in the forum
  • 04.08.2018 9:48:05
  • Female (35)
  • Wakefield
  • Not single
Newbie looking for advice

Thank you all for your replies. I'm going to look up sub poses.
I'm looking forward to seeing how this all develops.
Excited 🤩

Pampered
icon-wio Pampered wrote something in the forum
  • 04.08.2018 9:42:30
  • Female (35)
  • Wakefield
  • Not single
Masochism newbie

I'm a newbie too and I'm currently reading SM101 by Jase Wiseman.
It is full of advice on keeping your play safe.
It doesn't assume prior knowledge of the scene and explains things really well

LikeVictoriaBlisse · Jump to discussion
Pampered
icon-wio Pampered wrote something in the forum
  • 04.08.2018 9:35:22
  • Female (35)
  • Wakefield
  • Not single
Newbie looking for advice

I've known my Dom years and trust him implicitly. The pictures are for his personal use.
But this is a new thing for me. He is breaking me in gently and we have not yet played our first scene. The instruction given is what makes me feel comfortable. I'm still learning what He likes. So far I know Read more… shoes and corsets and bondage.
I want to be the best sub I can be for him though.

Pampered
Newbie looking for advice
My Dom has asked me for some photos of myself.
What would be the best poses and How do I actually go about taking them.
Should I be naked or should I wear something?
He told me he wanted me to choose but I don't know what he would like... help please
eyemblacksheep
eyemblacksheep ➦eyemblacksheep quote Pampered:❝We've known each other years in other capacities. It is a recent thing for us to be intimate. It is a more recent thing for the Dom/sub part to develop.
Does that make more sense?❞
I totally get that - and with context it changes my answer a little bit.
I think Read more… therefore he's assessing how comfortable you currently are - and - I think that's the answer.
You may be comfortably (say) kneeling naked ready to serve - or you may be comfortable with a ball gag and "Masters pig" scrawled across your chest and a butt plug in : I think it's up to you to decide how comfortable you currently are.
LikeVictoriaBlisse · 04.08.2018 11:53:38
Takeitlikeaman ➦Takeitlikeaman quote PunkAndProudUK:❝Shouldn't he be telling you what pics he wants?❞
About to say that myself. ➦Takeitlikeaman quote PunkAndProudUK:❝Shouldn't he be telling you what pics he wants?❞
About to say that myself.
Like · 04.08.2018 11:25:26
Pampered
Pampered I suppose it is strange.
We've known each other years in other capacities. It is a recent thing for us to be intimate. It is a more recent thing for the Dom/sub part to develop.
Does that make more sense? I suppose it is strange.
We've known each other years in other capacities. It is a recent thing for us to be intimate. It is a more recent thing for the Dom/sub part to develop.
Does that make more sense?
Likeeyemblacksheep, callipygian · 04.08.2018 11:19:35
Show more 3 of 17