Finding The Right Pace

[No****]

I’m an experienced Dom, but something I have been having issues with recently is ensuring things aren’t moving too quickly or too slowly. It can be difficult, especially when both you and your sub end up being extremely excited when you meet. I’m wondering if there’s any sort of way to determine how to set the pace without scaring a sub off. Obviously not all subs are the same but if there’s any sort of advice other experienced Doms would be able to provide for me that would be greatly appreciated (:

[Ta****]

When you find out , bottle it first !! My own approach is to just start softly , suggest, and probe and test ideas a little. If that lands , then move forward ... but always open, honest communication about each topic/suggestion etc. Setting an environment where the sub can feel free to openly discuss feelings, allows kne to understand her more, and so set a pace, and refine it if necessary. But then , that's just me .. everyone has their own 'Art' and style..

[SilkieOne]

Be kind, gentle, soft of touch. Speak little, listen much. Listening is the MOST important. Friends first

[To****]

As a Dom who has a lot of experience with new Subs. The first thing I suggest is the pace at least at the beginning should be set by the sub. That's not to say complete control because your job is to move them along in times of *** Etc. But Subs tend to be overly excited at the beginning and so I create mandatory decompression times after new events. This helps a lot by saying there's a several day downtime then a discussion Etc that helps to slow things down because people in the heat of excitement will tend to just scream more more

[da****]

I think a dom commanding me to tell him how that feels and, to be honest, is key. This is training your sub from the start that you demand open and honest communication above all else. " if you need me to slow down, tell me... if you feel nervous, tell me"
Hope this helps

[Kl****]

Monday at 01:22 PM, TooRich4You said:

As a Dom who has a lot of experience with new Subs. The first thing I suggest is the pace at least at the beginning should be set by the sub. That's not to say complete control because your job is to move them along in times of *** Etc. But Subs tend to be overly excited at the beginning and so I create mandatory decompression times after new events. This helps a lot by saying there's a several day downtime then a discussion Etc that helps to slow things down because people in the heat of excitement will tend to just scream more more

💯

[au****]

Open communication is key and the sub and dom need to be honest with themselves and each other.