Brat advice

[Av****]

Heyyyy! I’ve recently gotten into my first real d/s dynamic with Sir. He is perfect and lovely and I adore worshipping Him and He Loves when I do!

Buuuut He wants me to fight back, too. He enjoys putting me in my place and corrupting me so to speak. I’m a virgin and I don’t have too much experience with this sort of thing. I’ve been in online dynamics before, but those were nothing like Sir.

I love misbehaving, but I get really nervous around Him (He’s SO HOT) and my smart ass remarks all disappear from my head when He talks to me. I want to know if anyone has advice on ways I can be a brat for Sir? I’ve done -some- bratting with Him, but I end up giving in too easily. He hasn’t explicitly told me that, but one time after I gave in to obedience He said, “Aww what a good little boy! But, don't hesitate to fight back! It can be fun.” I really really wanna please Him as best as I can.

I know part of this comes from experience and I will eventually be less nervous around Sir, but I would love to know if any more experienced brats/gamers have any advice?

Thank you for reading!

[Da****]

As you get more comfortable in your relationship, your anxiety/tension should naturally ease up. I would practice pushing. Stop before you give in and push a tiny bit more each time. It takes a little mindfulness, but eventually you'll get to your comfort point. ✨️ I would advise asking your Sir about his limits. If/when are the times he'd like more assertive. If he's you an unsure or idk, he should think about more. If he's likes it a surprise, ask what moods him receptive and adjust accordingly. All of this really just takes time and communication. Good luck. ♡

[Da****]

4 minutes ago, DazPandas said:

As you get more comfortable in your relationship, your anxiety/tension should naturally ease up. I would practice pushing. Stop before you give in and push a tiny bit more each time. It takes a little mindfulness, but eventually you'll get to your comfort point. ✨️ I would advise asking your Sir about his limits. If/when are the times he'd like more assertive. If he's you an unsure or idk, he should think about more. If he's likes it a surprise, ask what moods him receptive and adjust accordingly. All of this really just takes time and communication. Good luck. ♡

Sorry that second part is jumbled.

When are the times he'd like for you to be more assertive?* if he's unsure or doesn't know, he should think about it more. If he enjoys the surprise, I would ask what moods he would be receptive towards your bratting, and I would adjust accordingly.**

[Av****]

21 minutes ago, DazPandas said:

Sorry that second part is jumbled.

When are the times he'd like for you to be more assertive?* if he's unsure or doesn't know, he should think about it more. If he enjoys the surprise, I would ask what moods he would be receptive towards your bratting, and I would adjust accordingly.**

Firstly, thank you very much for the response!! It was quite helpful ^^ I will be sure to take your advice.

Sir and I have spoken about it before, He told me if He was ever genuinely annoyed or if it was the wrong time He would be very clear about it. And He said in all other cases no matter how intensely He speaks to me I needn’t worry and that I can be sure He’s having fun.

Sir is very very good at communication and I’m not worried about upsetting Him. He has hinted a few other times that He would like me to brat more. He also tells me all the time that He likes making me nervous/flustered and such. Which my subby side loves but my bratty side hatessss lol.

I think He wants me to be more assertive in general- He’s been very very patient with me and careful not to press too far on my boundaries. He has told me He doesn’t wanna push me too far and He has purposefully gone very very slow (even to the point where I practically beg Him to be mean to me lol). I think He wants me to put up a fight/brat/struggle most times. I’ll talk to Him about it again though!

[Da****]

4 minutes ago, Avcjjsyg said:

Firstly, thank you very much for the response!! It was quite helpful ^^ I will be sure to take your advice.

Sir and I have spoken about it before, He told me if He was ever genuinely annoyed or if it was the wrong time He would be very clear about it. And He said in all other cases no matter how intensely He speaks to me I needn’t worry and that I can be sure He’s having fun.

Sir is very very good at communication and I’m not worried about upsetting Him. He has hinted a few other times that He would like me to brat more. He also tells me all the time that He likes making me nervous/flustered and such. Which my subby side loves but my bratty side hatessss lol.

I think He wants me to be more assertive in general- He’s been very very patient with me and careful not to press too far on my boundaries. He has told me He doesn’t wanna push me too far and He has purposefully gone very very slow (even to the point where I practically beg Him to be mean to me lol). I think He wants me to put up a fight/brat/struggle most times. I’ll talk to Him about it again though!

Thats very good! I'm happy you've found a patient and communicative Sir.

[ee****]

Oh I just straight up don’t listen to them. That really grinds the gears of doms. Or doing the opposite of what they ask. He says sit, cross your arms and stand. I find this very easy for me because I have a very aggressive personality trait. Try doing some mental exercises disobeying. (Standing up for yourself and being beat is definitely scary sometimes)

[Da****]

6 minutes ago, eelsrslimey said:

Oh I just straight up don’t listen to them. That really grinds the gears of doms. Or doing the opposite of what they ask. He says sit, cross your arms and stand. I find this very easy for me because I have a very aggressive personality trait. Try doing some mental exercises disobeying. (Standing up for yourself and being beat is definitely scary sometimes)

Oh I do that too! Haha. Just to be annoying. And also when they're trying to be formidable, laughing can get to them too. Or whenever they give an order, I'll pout a long with, "but daddddy" and they respond with the same exasperated "WHAT, Pet, WHAT!?" 😅

[Deleted Member]

Hmm. 

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It could be that there's a disconnect between your natural brattiness and your D/s brattiness, which you may have t discover and develop over time. There are different levels of sass.

.

Alfred Pennyworth sasses Bruce Wayne all the time. Still serves him, but put a bit of literal English on it.

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During Midori's Art of Feminine Dominance classes, attendees were asked to list people they admired and words to describe them to help develop an idea of their D/s persona. If you did the same, how many folks (actual, fictional, etc.) would you find that have some brattiness or sass to them? Is that part of them what you admire? Even if some of those traits are part of your default, maybe other facets could become part of your brat persona.

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If you look at physical touch as a way to test out grappling moves, it can kinda mimic being a puppy at play. "Oooh, a leash! Tug of war!"

.

Whatever you decide, I wish you good luck!

 

[Av****]

37 minutes ago, eelsrslimey said:

Oh I just straight up don’t listen to them. That really grinds the gears of doms. Or doing the opposite of what they ask. He says sit, cross your arms and stand. I find this very easy for me because I have a very aggressive personality trait. Try doing some mental exercises disobeying. (Standing up for yourself and being beat is definitely scary sometimes)

I've tried ignoring Him like that but it always backfires.. He's so mean. He'll just ignore me until I do what He wants or He'll say "oh, are you not in the mood for play?" ahhhh He's evil fr

[Av****]

19 minutes ago, Griot said:

Hmm. 

.

It could be that there's a disconnect between your natural brattiness and your D/s brattiness, which you may have t discover and develop over time. There are different levels of sass.

.

Alfred Pennyworth sasses Bruce Wayne all the time. Still serves him, but put a bit of literal English on it.

.

During Midori's Art of Feminine Dominance classes, attendees were asked to list people they admired and words to describe them to help develop an idea of their D/s persona. If you did the same, how many folks (actual, fictional, etc.) would you find that have some brattiness or sass to them? Is that part of them what you admire? Even if some of those traits are part of your default, maybe other facets could become part of your brat persona.

.

If you look at physical touch as a way to test out grappling moves, it can kinda mimic being a puppy at play. "Oooh, a leash! Tug of war!"

.

Whatever you decide, I wish you good luck!

 

Thank you!! That is very insightful. I will try that out ^^

[FETMOD-TF]

I have done some housekeeping on this thread and removed many comments as they were completely off topic.  Thank you to those who have stayed on topic. 

[fo****]

Sometimes bratting is best when kept simple. You can tease and either not follow his rules or sometimes just barely obey them. If he says 'send me a picture' and it's obvious that he wants something spicy, send a totally vanilla one. Pretend you don't know what he means, play innocent and smirk like you're the one in control.
Pretend to be in charge and he'll very quickly show you that you aren't but it's fun.

[de****]

My favorite go-to’s are like talking back, or directly ignoring what he says to do

He says “let’s get something to eat” and u give him a hard time on where to go, what to eat, etc

If he says to blow him, get on top of him instead, totally neglect blowing him. Or, an alt choice, do nothing but tease him the whole time. Barely kitten licking it, avoiding the c**k all together and kissing along the balls and thighs. Just never actually fully blow him until he gets fed up and shoves it down ur throat

[pu****]

Bratting has to be negotiated. Sit down with him and talk about it

[Th****]

[If you dont mind a D's input]
Q1: Does Sir like bratting-behavior or is he a "brat tamer"? If he's an experienced brat-tamer initiating a serious talk about your wants and expectations, about such, can be a turn-on all by itself ;) but more importantly inform both of you more than you could have even imagined, be brave!
Q2: Are you willing to discuss metrics? behaviors can easily be classified into categories of severity (and thus their repercussions)! Clearly defined action/reaction can build trust and actually become a love language of it's own.
Q3: Most "Sir"-like people are actually low-key people-pleasers, just kinky and confident-presenting!! So... feedback+feedback+feedback!!! Let him know when he's blowing your mind or off the mark... he might seem like he's "really insightful and intuitive" but it means alot to us D types to hear accurate feedback!
Q4: it's okay if your "backtalk"/sass lacks in the moment. You don't always need rapier-wit! Sometimes a clumsy attempt is endearing in it's own way and will build fondness as well as ero-moments! ;)

[ba****]

Omg. My gf acts like this all the time. We don't have a brat/tamer thing though. She's my little sub. So what should I do when she's being all itchy for no damn good reason? Do you think I should punish her? Asking for serious advice.

[ba****]

I depends what you consider a punishment you can slap her but and be sternly playful if that makes sense or just tease a bit I guess and see what you working with it depends on her sensitivity

[ba****]

Well it depends on the severity of the outlash. I'd really like some advice.

[sa****]

If being a brat in person is a struggle bratting through text or over voice chat is always fun. Just remember he will keep track of the bratting and you may end up with some funishment or punishment later.

I like doing things like sending bratty memes or minor rule breaks through texts. Just little things to push buttons and get reactions. Light teasing about me being the boss and him being the sub.

You will get more comfortable with your brat role the longer your in the relationship and will learn what buttons your comfortable with pushing in person and through text. Just remember too not push the doms buttons too hard because they have boundaries to be respected too.

[Do****]

Did I mark down that I'm a brat too ?
Because, your comment sounds exactly like me. Here I sit in wonderment 🤔