Married: Where Do You Draw the Line?

[be****]

you should ask all these questions to your partner because that’s the only way to get the answers that will matter to you & her/him

[Le****]

I’ve never been married but I’ve been in relationships that lasted longer than some marriages. In my opinion, anything that you feel you need to keep secret from your partner is cheating. Not everyone is going to understand this kind of connection; some will see it as cheating and some perhaps will fail to see how intimate and personal it can be. Either way, your partner should (hopefully) accept you, every part of you, and all that comes with you. If you feel you need to hide something that’s a sign the relationship may not be working.

[co****]

Ya if you’re not telling your partner about it you’re cheating

[be****]

The boundaries are made wherever you and your partner choose. The secret is clear communication and total honesty xx

[am****]

I started showing off online in ≈2012, and through doing so, I became a part of a cool community for that kind of thing. It really helped build my confidence. I dated a guy from 2014 to 2017 consecutively, but he wasn't a fan. He didn't demand I quit, but he was definitely adverse to it. I think that was a healthy way to handle it on his end.

[ch****]

I think its cheating if your significant other doesn't no and doesn't agree to it

[tomuchforyou]

It's all about communication. If unknown to your partner I would feel it's cheating. Hence the meaning of the word. In a committed open relationship there's tons of communication and trust. If my partner got off knowing she was secretly desired and wanted from online communications. Cool. She's knows daddy is the only one that gets to decide when she gets stuffed. And by whom. Now the tricky part is where are your boundaries with each other? But in my opinion and in.my relationship. If it's not talked about. It's dishonesty and cheating. And a big part of my relationship...no a huge part. Is built on trust.

[bo****]

I believe that anything that's hidden and kept a secret from a partner is considered cheating. There should always be an open discussion before you even consider yourself in a position to be temted by anyone else, even if it's just online.
But that's just me. My husband didn't agree, and now I'm here, so 😅

[91****]

As someone who values Loyalty of mind over loyalty of body and sexuality, I think it is the best way to have a deeply connected relationship where both partners still can be individuals.
Those boundaries must be communicated and set together, but otherwise as a long story short: Fantasize about what you want, talk to who you want, chat with who you want, fuck with who you want to - as long as at the end of the day you're in our bed, valueing our relationship over all the little flings you can have.

[Wi****]

Sometimes it's hard to talk to the partner who is traditional and has put it in the air numerous times that they have no other interest but you both have already created a connection but one is curious and want to be more free and spice things up. It can be very difficult trying to find the right way to bring it up to your partner.. I feel like no one wants to have to cheat on their partner, sometimes it's just hard to have that conversation because that partner will never understand

[Deleted Member]

57 minutes ago, Willhanglow said:

Sometimes it's hard to talk to the partner who is traditional and has put it in the air numerous times that they have no other interest but you both have already created a connection but one is curious and want to be more free and spice things up. It can be very difficult trying to find the right way to bring it up to your partner.. I feel like no one wants to have to cheat on their partner, sometimes it's just hard to have that conversation because that partner will never understand

No one "has" to cheat. You either leave to chase what you want in a fleeting moment or you honor thr commitment you gave to another person. This isn't difficult. It's called having morals and being considerate of others.

[Ba****]

1 hour ago, Willhanglow said:

Sometimes it's hard to talk to the partner who is traditional and has put it in the air numerous times that they have no other interest but you both have already created a connection but one is curious and want to be more free and spice things up. It can be very difficult trying to find the right way to bring it up to your partner.. I feel like no one wants to have to cheat on their partner, sometimes it's just hard to have that conversation because that partner will never understand

Then it's gut check time....you may be with the wrong partner my friend.

[Wi****]

I agree... but there our different situations everyone's situation is not the same.

[Deleted Member]

5 hours ago, Willhanglow said:

I agree... but there our different situations everyone's situation is not the same.

No, that's just a cop-out. The only way your situation would be different is if you're leading someone on to exploit them financially.

[Wi****]

No that's not it at all...I'm not referring myself....but like I said everyone has different situations

[KC****]

Married couple here. Our boundary is trust and honesty. The wife is free to do whatever she chooses as long as she doesn't hide or lie about it. She's got different boundaries. Im not allowed to play without her. But we communicate well and respect each other's wishes so it works well for us.

[ha****]

If you have to keep it quiet then its probably crossing the line.

If its going to hurt your partner if they found out its prob crossing the line.



Communication communication communication.


You and your partner cannot address problems, issues concerns, or whats wrong or right without communication.

[Sc****]

There shouldn't be anything wrong with it my wife and I have talked about this, if you are concealing it then in my mind you're cheating, anything that you hide for a reason isn't a good thing and your relationship isn't great to begin with if you're already exploring options like this because, what's next

[57****]

I agree that you and your spouse need to talk about your needs. Maybe she is wondering too..you discuss who u r seeing and when. You each can have other partners in open relationship. Can you handle her with another guy,with your knowledge? Would have to be fair both sides.

[gi****]

Married guy, she doesn't know about this :/ 🥵🧑🏻‍🦰

[de****]

Agree with scotty118 and 57precious it has to be open and honest for it to work

[do****]

Do you like pina coladas and getting caught in the rain?

[se****]

I wrote erotica when I was married as a way to safely explore my sexuality and not feel like I was cheating. It was actually awesome bc I met a lot of other writers, and got to write out my wildest fantasies, so I count it as a win

[LV****]

The trick is to communicate about your needs and desires. I have some that my wife draws a boundary on or just isn't into it. I'm here and out there fulfilling those desires so that I come home happy.

[oh****]

Well I had no idea my wife joined the site back in November 2023 and has been pretty active as far as posting pics and videos and interacting with other fetlifers on a regular basis but as soon as I asked her about it she lied and said she hadn’t been on it for a long time but she obviously didn’t know I knew her fet name and had just been on it a couple of days before that posting about meeting up with a couple.