So I didn't think a friend could hurt me...

[Deleted Member]

So I didn't think a friend could hurt me.  I knew Scammers could hurt me....they would lure me in and make me feel loved, wanted, needed and desired only to one day ask for *** or more than I had to offer them, and then when I refused to meet demands I was shunned and it hurt.  It hurt but it only went down so far and no more.  No more because I wouldn't let myself open up that much because I was afraid of scammers.  I knew Doms could hurt me...they would lure me in with promises not to push my limits, to care for me and to only want the best for me if...and if i didn't meet their needs or didn't push my limits, the love and care and wanting the best for me would disappear.  They were able to hurt me but only so far.  I wouldn't let myself open up to Doms in such a way to let them hurt me in that sacred space.  I didn't know friends could hurt me.  I trusted, I cared, I opened myself to them.  They took my trust and seemed to share theirs, they appreciated the care and demonstrated care in return but then they disappeared and it hurt.  It hurt more than a scammer, it hurt more than a Dom who didn't know the meaning of Dom, and it hurt in that sacred place I held dear.  It made me shrink back just that much more.  I didn't think a friend could hurt me.

Edited October 21, 2020 by Deleted Member

[Annlee_3]

I felt this in my soul. Trust me, youre not alone.

[Ky****]

unfortunately its true that only a friend can really hurt you, because only someone you let into your heart has the means to do so, if only we could read the future and no who will be true to us and us to them

[Deleted Member]

Oh I am sorry. It’s happened to me and I still feel the ache. But being open with others shouldn’t be a regret, even if it hurts sometimes, as it brings so much to us don’t you think?

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, Curvykate said:

Oh I am sorry. It’s happened to me and I still feel the ache. But being open with others shouldn’t be a regret, even if it hurts sometimes, as it brings so much to us don’t you think?

Absolutely, i won’t stop being open because, you’re right, it does bring so much. I’m sorry you still feel the ache xo

[Deleted Member]

24 minutes ago, Mirixo said:

Absolutely, i won’t stop being open because, you’re right, it does bring so much. I’m sorry you still feel the ache xo

I’m glad you won’t give up. I think we lose something when we stop being open to people. I just feel so sad that people I care about turned their back on my friendship. Neither of us deserve that Mirixo.

[Deleted Member]

I’m so sorry to read this. It can really undermine your confidence. Yes there are some despicable people who have no morals and can cause emotional damage. On a positive side there are some wonderful genuine guys and girls here , it takes a lot of time and effort to be able to trust them. I know how it feels to be hurt especially when that friend has 15 years of memories and shared experiences.The ground opens up and we drop to the bottom of a hole . When this happens several times in a life time it will either break you in half or we recover and like you said don’t let them in too deep in your psyche.

[Deleted Member]

Friends can hurt you far worse than anyone else because you became their friend as you liked who they were or seemed to be.
They were someone you could trust or someone who knew how horrible it was to go through being discarded or hurt by someone.
Except they then do it to you and it cuts so much deeper because all you can do is question why.
When a friend who claims to understand how horrible something is then does it to you it leaves you trying to figure it out and you may even blame yourself.
However IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!
Many of us wear a mask when talking to others. Be it one to appear happy and ok or one to fake confidence in yourself. However others wear masks to hide their horrible nature or true intentions.
Please do not blame yourself for any of it as everyone can be fooled by someone pretending to be something else or hiding the fact they have changed.
Nothing I can say will remove the hurt you have been given but you are strong for opening up about this and that strength will see you through.

[Mickey10]

12 hours ago, Mirixo said:

 

 

[Mickey10]

I feel so sorry for your experience your a beautiful caring person who I wish the best for

[Carnelian2]

Like others have said, I felt your *** as I was reading it. I always go into new relationships with an open heart; be it friendship or more. This does open me up to being hurt but the rewards are so much higher and that is why I keep doing it.
All I can suggest is to have faith, be optimistic, stop being yourself but also be cautious of the signs. Just because someone says he/she is a friend does not mean they are. It is what they do that matters in the end.

 

[Deleted Member]

To be clear, I hold no hard feelings towards my 'friend'.  Life changed for him and I became dispensable.  The hard part was realizing how deep the hurt could go because of the trust given.  

[Mickey10]

Mirixo wow what a beautiful understanding kind person you are

[Deleted Member]

32 minutes ago, Mickey10 said:

Mirixo wow what a beautiful understanding kind person you are

not really, but in forming a friendship with this person, I have to believe there is a whole lot of good in them, it was just not a good time for us to be friends right now.  

[Carnelian2]

6 hours ago, Mirixo said:

not really, but in forming a friendship with this person, I have to believe there is a whole lot of good in them, it was just not a good time for us to be friends right now.  

I think that is a very wise perspective. People come and go from our lives. Some stay for longer than others until whatever growth we had to go through has happened. I have no hard feelings towards any of the people who have touched me in my life, whether positive or not so positive, as they have all been there for a reason.

 

[Ibiese123]

Wow i understand that you feel that way, however, sometimes is the only way of learning from some of us.

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, Ibiese123 said:

Wow i understand that you feel that way, however, sometimes is the only way of learning from some of us.

True

[ol****]

This may be why I have a very small circle of friends.

I've learned the hard way that some freinds, even the ones who seem firm and fair, are really fairweather friends.