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Older Subs


Ta****

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Please speak to someone at your local DV agency. This crosses the line.
Yes, there are many Dom's that are interested in older subs. There are many Dom's that are not superficial and just seek a true sub, willing to serve. Age, looks, body size, and ethnicity do not play a role to these types of Dom's!
This guy sounds dangerous. Both in and out of the BDSM community, there are men with such low self esteem that they feel that they have to make a woman feel worthless and unattractive to other men or else she might leave him. This is a sign that he is weak, not that he is dominant.

To answer the question "Are Doms interested in older subs?" Personally speaking, age is not that important for me. I am in my late fifties and I guess I would extend my range out to 70 or so. It is not so much the age, but the attraction. And attraction for me is as much about character and attitude, as it is about looks.

Others have already addressed the other obvious red flags in your current relationship, and there is a lot of sage advice there.

Finding the right partner/s is not easy for most people. But I do believe that "seek and ye shall find" is a universal law. It won't  necessarily come easily and you have to have the courage to give your search commitment and effort. But if you find the courage to break free from what seems to be the wrong relationship then you can be proud of that bravery and take that self respect into exciting new beginnings.

Best of luck in your journey.

There absolutely are. I'm 48 myself and a solo poly individual with more than one Dom type, so I can speak from experience that a healthy dynamic is possible at this stage in life.

Your worth is absolute.
Do NOT ever believe anyone—even that voice in your own head—that tells you are unworthy. Age has nothing to do with finding a fulfilling relationship.

The behavior you described is a major red flag. For him to demand forgiveness for his bigger offense while refusing to forgive you for simply voicing a concern indicates a major power imbalance and hypocrisy.

This is manipulation, not true domination.

Healthy BDSM dynamics are built on Consent, Communication, and Boundaries. Using the dynamic you want against you as a mental weapon is a form of emotional manipulation. This person is not acting like a healthy Dom.

You deserve better.
Consider walking away from this dynamic. A true partner and Dominant should respect and empower you, not tear you down or manipulate your good nature.
Punk Electra is right, seek help.
No is a full sentence.
Personally, I require continuous consent from any partner.
Submission is earned not demanded. If you don’t like the way he treats you leave, it’s easier said than done i know.
The one good thing that’s coming out of this is that at least you now know where your boundaries are and how to set them.
Best of luck to u taz, happy hunting.
On 11/10/2025 at 7:37 AM, Tazbaby75 said:

I got punished this morning for not reacting to pur daughter breaking a cup the way he wanted. I put her emotional well being before anything

That is not a dom. That's an a****le

Get away from him

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