First outing to dungeon

[Deleted Member]

I really want to check out a local dungeon or club, but as a new sub I don't want to risk going alone.
I know there are beginner nights but I don't know if that gives more security from the staff or makes me more of a target for bad seeds.

What was your first solo experience to a dungeon club like? Any tips? Thanks

Edited November 15, 2025 by Deleted Member
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[Ch****]

Wouldn't recommend going alone as a rule. But if you do, and it's unlikely anything really bad will happen, I'd recommend that you dont go with the intention of playing. Just watch, get a feel for the place, who the dungeon monitors are, how watchful are they, and go with the intention of making friends. More than likely they can give a better idea of what goes on there, who to watch out for, etc. Doms usually have to do crowd control in our experience, so you'd have to really know/trust a dom to do it as you like. Big difference between dungeons that allow sex play and those that dont, btw. 

[La****]

I have gone solo to a dungeon multiple times. Pick your dungeon carefully. My dungeon has membership requirement where you have to attend an orientation about respecting others. They have dungeon monitors and a zero tolerance policy.

As you said, look for gateway nights or taster nights. Go with a kink friend. My dungeon also does classes which is a good way to get in there and check it out, and also make some friends who could ease that first awkward play night adventure.

[Pe****]

Standing up for yourself, even just vocally, is your best security. There's a lot of politics when it comes to community and dungeons. Predators with the right connections can be seen as pillars of the community and safe, just because people are afraid to say anything negative. If you speak up nice and loud, somebody nearby will notice. Consent is a huge factor, and the majority of those attending will not tolerate anybody violating consent.

[sl****]

How do you find dungeons?

[Ce****]

@slicznyy444 Sites like this can be utilized. As well as input from those in the lifestyle that you make contact with on your journey.

[Pe****]

9 hours ago, slicznyy444 said:

How do you find dungeons?

fetlife will usually have local groups to connect with people in your area online as well as find events.

[sl****]

48 minutes ago, Pet_Mimic said:

fetlife will usually have local groups to connect with people in your area online as well as find events.

Ohh okay I haven’t really seen anything like that on here yet

[Sn****]

The first time is always really weird, not bad but strange. It's a whole new world with unique social cues...so expect to walk away with a mix.

My default advice is to never go alone. Not for safety reasons because if I thought it was dangerous I wouldn't go myself, but for enjoying the experience.

Going with someone means you have someone to talk to, play with and it's less awkward. Go to a few munches via Fetlife, make a friend and then go together

[Fu****]

@snow-pup
Excellent advice. It can be overwhelming at first because we live in a fairly sexually repressed society. It's almost shocking to see people of all body types in various states of undress, and people are totally relaxed. People aren't perving on each other. I found that being in an open environment with other naked people is freeing and liberating. We wear our identities, personality, and social status in a locker. Everyone is equal, and everyone is accepted (at least at the clubs I have attended)

[Mi****]

I went to my first dungeon party last night. It was wild and I loved it. Lots of submissive men and dominant women/femmes which was beautiful. It was overwhelming but soon it was just nice to watch people engage in their kinks. I even met a lovely married couple I hope to hang with again (she domed him and he loved it). It was a bit shocking at first but I'm a perv so eventually it was the most glorious nasty thing I've ever seen. Can't wait to play there one day

[pi****]

How do I get invited into a dungeon

[Fu****]

The best way to create a profile on Fetlife.com and search for local clubs, munches, and dungeons.

[pi****]

So another app or is that just online? I will do so thank you toyz

[nancyask]

it was a bit shocking the first time i did not know what was going to happen he tryed to lift me off the floor by my boobs   did not work