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Mistakes & Growth


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Navigating kink with others can be challenging at times. In our experience, kink turns up the volume on everything… more trust, more intimacy, better communication, & much better sex life. But, it’s also a bigger emotional impact if you break that trust. So, we have also used our kink dynamic to grow as individuals, really emphasizing integrity & communication.

What mistakes have you made in your kink relationships & how have you grown from the lessons from those mistakes?

Lucky, we work hard and these don’t come up often. But, just yesterday, I, as the dominant, I didn’t communicate well and was insensitive to the possible impacts on my wife / submissive feelings in a conversation about us both to meet up with another submissive. It was unintentional but as her husband and dom, I should have foreseen this and should have had more sensitivity to it. So, I’ll be communicating more thoughtful and thoroughly in this area of our dynamic in the future. As doms, our decisions have a tremendous emotional impact on our submissives and it’s important also recognize that.
Wow... like to see this. A space for vulnerability and accountability .This is a great example of a loud apology without it being obnoxious. Kudos to you for acknowledging the situation and really handling it like a true DOM. may your Sub really feel the sincerity 🪄💫️.
This hits home. I have set rules for a D/s relationship. One of those rules is called King and Queens rule. Basically I need to treat you like a Queen in order to earn the right to be treated as a King.
In this rule pertains a no yelling at each other with the punishment being maybe 2 hrs of anal training (buttplug). Well, one day in a heated discussion my octaves raised a bit. Now the truth was I wasn't yelling, I had no intention of yelling, nor was I angry for any reason.
She called me out and said I needed to put it on.
She was coming from her feelings. As a Dom I should have said OK Im sorry and put it on, but instead I said the truth and ignored her feelings simply because I thought she just wanted an excuse to punish me for her own pleasure.
That moment alone damaged our trust in the rules we were living by and in turn put a strain on our relationship. Saying that the rules were only catered to me. She was hurt.
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