Autism/ADHD and BDSM

[ap****]

How does structured Vs unstructured intimacy affect your emotional regulation?

[ju****]

I’ve got really bad adhd and for me I prefer unstructured as my brain cannot cope with a well thought out plan. It’s not ideal but I’ve found over the years with friends and partners that if we talk of structure at the beginning in parts or smaller doses it’s a lot easier for my brain to process/ handle

[in****]

Honestly I never really thought about that. It seems like to me im just addicted to intimacy and end up seeking as much of it from anywhere I can find it

[ap****]

3 minutes ago, infinityreaver said:

Honestly I never really thought about that. It seems like to me im just addicted to intimacy and end up seeking as much of it from anywhere I can find it

So you've never seen it as a form of emotional regulation? Do you think you feel unregulated without intimacy Vs regulated with it?

[in****]

Definitely unregulated without. Its a source of loads of dopamine

[ap****]

4 minutes ago, infinityreaver said:

Definitely unregulated without. Its a source of loads of dopamine

So would you say that now you see it like this that it could be used as a strategy for you to emotionally regulate? I'm a psychology student and autistic and BDSM is definitely a special interest, I love connecting dots 😊

[ju****]

5 minutes ago, infinityreaver said:

Definitely unregulated without. Its a source of loads of dopamine

I agree for me personally it’s over whelming feels like I’m on the verge of a panick attack

[ap****]

15 minutes ago, justin267 said:

I’ve got really bad adhd and for me I prefer unstructured as my brain cannot cope with a well thought out plan. It’s not ideal but I’ve found over the years with friends and partners that if we talk of structure at the beginning in parts or smaller doses it’s a lot easier for my brain to process/ handle

Yeah I have adhd and autism, my ADHD craves chaos and unpredictability, my autism is the opposite 😂

[ap****]

2 minutes ago, justin267 said:

I agree for me personally it’s over whelming feels like I’m on the verge of a panick attack

So you feel emotionally unregulated without intimacy and more regulated with? But the ADHD aspect cannot handle structure? This is so interesting x

[in****]

My adhd requires predictability and routine to function but at the same time I absolutely hate repetition

[ju****]

10 minutes ago, aporianoctis87 said:

Yeah I have adhd and autism, my ADHD craves chaos and unpredictability, my autism is the opposite 😂

How the hell do you survive 😂 I mean I’m a sub because of it because I love the Cahos 😂

[ap****]

3 minutes ago, justin267 said:

How the hell do you survive 😂 I mean I’m a sub because of it because I love the Cahos 😂

My sub side craves the structure 😂

[ap****]

9 minutes ago, infinityreaver said:

My adhd requires predictability and routine to function but at the same time I absolutely hate repetition

Do you have ADHD or autism or both?

[in****]

Adhd formally but I suspect some autism was went undiagnosed

[ci****]

Intimacy only comes from loyalty

[ju****]

9 minutes ago, aporianoctis87 said:

My sub side craves the structure 😂

Hmm interesting that it’s the opposite 🤷🏽‍♂️

[ap****]

8 minutes ago, cincinnatiSBM said:

Intimacy only comes from loyalty

That wasn't my question 🤦🏻‍♀️

[ap****]

1 minute ago, justin267 said:

Hmm interesting that it’s the opposite 🤷🏽‍♂️

I'm autistic, we crave structure x

[ju****]

1 minute ago, aporianoctis87 said:

I'm autistic, we crave structure x

Oh okay I understand tbh I’ve got a fun pegging session with someone tomorrow and she has a small amount of autism this post now is making me question 😂

[ap****]

1 minute ago, justin267 said:

Oh okay I understand tbh I’ve got a fun pegging session with someone tomorrow and she has a small amount of autism this post now is making me question 😂

What's it making you question?

[ju****]

5 minutes ago, aporianoctis87 said:

What's it making you question?

The Cahos as there will be one for structure and other for Cahos I’m sure it will be fun regardless

[ap****]

3 minutes ago, justin267 said:

The Cahos as there will be one for structure and other for Cahos I’m sure it will be fun regardless

Definitely enjoy it, just because she might or might not be structured, that doesn't at all mean you will feel it, I'm internally structured and people still see me as chaotic 😂

[ju****]

12 minutes ago, aporianoctis87 said:

Definitely enjoy it, just because she might or might not be structured, that doesn't at all mean you will feel it, I'm internally structured and people still see me as chaotic 😂

I mean I ain’t complaining for obvious reasons and I don’t think I’d ever say no to anyone plus it’s always a nice feeling when people want to see more of you so on that note let the structured Cahos begin 😂

[ap****]

5 minutes ago, justin267 said:

I mean I ain’t complaining for obvious reasons and I don’t think I’d ever say no to anyone plus it’s always a nice feeling when people want to see more of you so on that note let the structured Cahos begin 😂

Structured chaos is still structure 😉 Enjoy your playdate!

[Am****]

I have autism so I just assume I never have no partner to play with. Hence single and have been for a long time