How do you handle an overthinker?

[ki****]

Oh i am a terrible over thinker. The one person i am 100% honest with is my bf. I am always open and upfront w. How i feel

[To****]

As a sub communication?.. even if it's a simple hi or.. hey I'll be gone for awhile, it's reassuring without just leaving us in the dark

[jo****]

honestly solves and quells the anxieties , pls don’t lie to me

[rg****]

I think it's about setting that expectation while assuring it has nothing to do with loosing interest in them but just life. Given the over thinking, this won't settle easily but slowly getting the point across carefully might eventually get to the finish line! I am still an over thinker but have jumped through a lot of hoops to validate what I just suggested!

[Ro****]

For me, I cope better when there's a regular routine. I know that, for example, I usually get contact first thing in the morning. I wake up, there's a message there. Once a routine is established and I know when to expect contact, its fine. One Domme I played with had her own requirements for contact in that she wanted a daily Good Morning message. Thinking about it, that might be a good solution to the stated problem. Set times of day when the sub is not only allowed to send a message but is expected to. I used to find myself looking forward to being able to send that message. Some days it led to long conversations, other days only a brief acknowledgement depending on how busy she was. Pf course, this can also be part of play if done sensitively. Anticipation of a message arriving or being able to send only at limited times can put some into a submissive frame of mind.

[ra****]

Ask him to tell you around when he will have you again or communicate with you. Allow him to live his life while he builds up his desire to take you again. Relish it don't stress about it

[br****]

So this has been particularly hard for me because the dom I was talking to KNEW my abandonment issues and the way I over think, and still absolutely ghosted me. Leaving it VERY hard for me to even try building anything with anyone else let alone being open about those issues.

[uk****]

I all depends on the dynamic but if your established "routine" is about to be disrupted you should be letting them know in advance. A quick message like "I have work stuff going on tomorrow so might be awol until the evening" will do the trick. Obviously there may be exceptions due to unforeseen circumstances but they should be very rare. If you don't think your sub is worth doing that for you probably don't deserve them (not judging you, just saying)

[Ph****]

I'd overthink so much i can even feel my prefrontal cortex 😂

[le****]

I am upfront with new doms I’m interested in that I DO overthink and need a daily check in at the least. Even if it’s just a quick hey it’s a busy morning and we will connect later. I actually just dealt with this today. Have gone out with this dom 5 times. I invited him to a theater production and he said it’s not my thing, which is fine and I simply said no problem I’d ask a friend. His responses were “uh oh”
And “is he better looking than me”. When I repeated it would be a friend he told me “I was overthinking”. “It was meant to be tongue in cheek” quickly followed by “you do what you got to do”.

Bottom line if the bare minimum is too much, they’re not the right person for you