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Why age isn’t the point!


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Something I’ve noticed over time.

A lot of younger subs who reach out to me aren’t looking for intensity, bravado, or someone trying to impress them. And they’re definitely not all looking for a DDLG dynamic.

What they seem drawn to is steadiness.

Calm leadership.
Clear boundaries.
Someone who isn’t reactive or performative.

In my experience, it’s less about age and more about how power is held. Being settled. Being consistent. Knowing who you are and not needing constant validation.

For some subs, especially younger ones, that feels grounding. Safe. Intentional.

Not controlling. Not loud. Just… present.

That’s been my experience, anyway. Curious how others see it.

SD

Good info. I’m new being a dom and I admit there is a lot I have to learn.

I dislike DDLG, but I do give a good bit of wiggle room on age if they meet the criteria in other ways. From my experience older dominants are more calm and ready to lead. They lead not to have control in this one area of life but because they’re comfortable and confident in themselves as a whole. This is extremely attractive to me because I like being able to trust my partner has a handle on themselves as well as me in the moment.

I am also a new M/D, and I have limited experience.

The younger subs I've encountered were chasing a fantasy but didn't really know what they wanted.
However, since I myself lack consistent practice with a sub. I haven't found my footing to even know exactly what boundaries to establish. So, although my demeanor is calm, firm, and nuturing.
I am lacking due to inexperience.

2 minutes ago, MonaR said:

I am also a new M/D, and I have limited experience.

The younger subs I've encountered were chasing a fantasy but didn't really know what they wanted.
However, since I myself lack consistent practice with a sub. I haven't found my footing to even know exactly what boundaries to establish. So, although my demeanor is calm, firm, and nuturing.
I am lacking due to inexperience.

I’m guilty of chasing fantasies, it’s healthy for me to hear a lot of this from others perspectives. Like I said, I have a lot to learn about being a M/D

That makes so much sense. If you were to read my ad, I’ve made that a focus as a Dominant. It was great to read this perspective.

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