How to bring up vetting a third person for play without hurting my LTR sub

[sa****]

Would like to bring in another female sub for play but don’t want to hurt my sub girlfriend? Any help would be great.
Side note my sub was ***d by a husband who pressured her into poly with other men.

[ha****]

Talk about it and see how she feels

[Deleted Member]

Has she expressed an interest in wanting to add another female sub into your relationship or are you asking because it's something you want to talk to her about to see if she is interested in it or not but don't know how best to approach it - the responses/advice will be different for both situations

[Deleted Member]

Communication is key, specifically since there’s been a history of *** in this area. Still, I’ve found that there are plenty of options that do not squelch her spirit and leave her still feeling valued. Every one of them begins with communication.
Perhaps let her choose or be actively involved in the f sub choosing portion ?

[Ni****]

Is she into ffm? If not, don't *** her. But if interested in a ff or ffm scene, maybe suggest that she finds the playmate rather than you? Only had one ffm weekend with my then sub and a bi sub playmate, but I created a private kik group for the three of us to chat in weeks before we met to ensure compatibility, and have a little fun 😉 our playmate, who I found on fetish, was a one off so jealousy not an issue, but be aware of the possibility if becomes more regular. And, as previous post, talk about it with your sub, then talk some more.

[Mo****]

Well Sacramento if you have been around the lifestyle for awhile, you know that this life revolves around Honest & Open communication, and Respect, and obviously, you gave your girlfriend those things in the beginning, for her to want to become your sub, BUT, it seems that she has not sated your desires for more. You have not told us about the length of time your current dynamic has been in place. Now not every time will both parties kinks totally align, and without knowing just how much *** she went through, and what the psychological effects were on her because of that ***. So from my perspective, I can't give you a definitive solution. What I will say is this, "How much do you value her with what she provides you". Is she worth loosing IF your desire goes against her wishes?
Now with dynamics, personal growth is a must, so is she growing and possibly ready to do more, or has she stagnated and just growing with the flow of the current relationship?

YOU need to honestly look at what you currently have, and if you want more, then plain and simple, you have to talk with her, explain the situation and give her time to decide. She will either have an open mind and willingly look at experiencing it, or she won't. If it is the later, then you have to decide are you prepared to forgo your desires and keep her, or are you definitely wanting that 'more' and are prepared to end the relationship? Once again, if it is the later, then explain that to her and prepare her for that end so she doesn't feel like life is just repeating itself at her expense, because she will feel a huge sense of loss if you go that way. The big thing is don't *** her in any way and let her make the decision. Remember, with whatever happens, someone is going to miss out, whether that be her with the dynamic ending or with you not getting your desired 'more',

[Deleted Member]

In my experience your sub needs to be into the idea first. I suggest asking them how they feel about the idea. If she is open to it then you can gradually discuss further but never push the issue. You want for her to be the one that makes it happen and you guide her along the way. If she is interested but skeptical I suggest telling her how hot she would look being with another woman. Once she gets warmed up to the idea then I would let her know that picking someone would be something that you do together. You don’t want it to be all on her and you always want to make sure she is included in the decision. Once you have found someone you both agree on then I suggest meeting in a neutral location to see if it would work out. I also suggest both of you come up with a signal to make to eachother if at any point you don’t think it would work so you can know to end the interaction so she feels safe. If your girl likes her then you’ve done the hardest part and now you can just enjoy the rewards of your hard work.

[Deleted Member]

I would tell her to begin with that you want another person for her, bring her in and let your sub have fun while you tell them what to do. Don’t join in the first time or two, let her become comfortable with the thought of another with you and ease into it. You got it man, just don’t make it all about you, gotta let your sub enjoy themselves every now and then. As a reward for being good

[Deleted Member]

An adept muse who minds boundaries well, knows how to inspire your sub and then makes a well timed exit… well, it’s like magic elixir.

[Ow****]

If your sub is open to the idea. Vet and select together. Then, initially how would your sub feel about taking control of the new “apprentice” sub? After all, she knows what you like. Make her feel important in the process.

[as****]

On 1/10/2022 at 6:56 PM, sacramento102 said:

Would like to bring in another female sub for play but don’t want to hurt my sub girlfriend? Any help would be great.
Side note my sub was ***d by a husband who pressured her into poly with other men.

Don't.

Hey, that was easy!

 

[Deleted Member]

On 1/19/2022 at 8:05 PM, astyn said:

Don't.

Hey, that was easy!

 

Simply this. You are prepared to trigger your current sub to satisfy what exactly? All of the above have hinted that you need to re-evaluate your motives, and I would suggest quite strongly that you do so.

[Ig****]

As long as your current sun knows that you are a team… why not order her to dominate her for you or take care of her?