"Cade", in Three Acts.
Three things you should know if I interest you: 1. I am a sadist, 2. I am polyamorous, and 3. I am for real. The following blog post will explain why these are important if you are interested in striking up a friendship with me, or more. Above all else be aware that I value experience and truth, and am willing to prove my integrity. Trust is created for me through one's actions matching their words, and as such, must be built over time.
I'm a sadist. A sadist is someone that gains pleasure from pain, typically thru inflicting. That is no less true for myself, and I use mental exploits like humiliation and objectification, as well as, physical acts like caning and needle play or cutting. I enjoy bruises and welts, and tears turn me on intensely. Of course, I have strict safety rules for play and interactions, and am constantly looking to increase my experience and knowledge in risk assessment and other safety concerns/disciplines. I belong to a community of like-minded individuals which can provide my character references, both personal and professional...and I am a member of multiple groups that participate in spreading acceptance through education of alternative relationship dynamics. If you have questions about my fetishes or background in sadism, please feel free to ask.
I'm polyamorous. The literal definition for polyamory is "many loves", but I think it's better summed up as having the capacity to love and be loved by more than one person in an open and honest manner. As such, I would say it is important to know that I am in a relationship with with a female, living with me. The female is my collared submissive, being trained as my slave. she has proven her obedience and worth as a servant, and I am honored to have her in my life. Despite this, we are looking to add another submissive female to our House. I like to think I am a unique and exceptional individual, and know for sure the others in my relationship are...you will meet them if you prove yourself worthy and prospective enough that I might add you to our lives. Their safety is paramount.
I'm real. The points this blog outlines are not details of role playing or the way I dream of living my life; they are the actuality and truth of my existence. This is my lifestyle...I choose to live my life by alternative methods. My lifestyle identifies and honors each of our intrinsic values as dominants or submissives that threads through every aspect of life, in the vanilla world as much as the animal kingdom. After reading all this about me all I ask is that you don't judge me. I am as human as you are and am just trying to find happiness just like you. I will be tolerant and respectful of your life choices because you have to live by them, and my choices will never effect you unless you allow them. Thank you for reading through this, I hope it is helpful in deciding your interest in me.
The undiscovered (and elusive) 4. You. If you've really read this far in all this rabble, then you're probably wondering what I am expecting from interactions with you, what I want, or what my ideal individual is that I'd like to meet. Let's be frank, this is an online/mobile networking site designed to allow people to meet across distances. You can be anyone and anything a mind can think of and words can describe, your intelligence and mastery of this vocabulary seem crucial to being able to express yourself and your desire succinctly. Among being intelligent, I should hope that you are open and accepting to the world I may be introducing you to...however, if you are not real, that will become obvious eventually, disappointing everyone involved. Know who you are and be confident in your experiences...it's good to stop seeing mistakes negatively and identify them as chances to learn. Going to more personal considerations, you would be a submissive/masochistic female, know why you identify as such, approximately age: 25-35 and happy.
Our desired relationship is a poly M/f/f triad.
The Secret of S/M; www.fetish.com/community/topic/5058-the-secret-of-sm/
Dominants ARE real, being a mentality that finds satisfaction in leading another through consensual means. We find that elements of D/S thread through all aspects of life, from the animal kingdom to the very vanilla business world; in one, we call them alphas, in the other, leaders. The key of all Read more… these roles though is the simple fact that there are specific behaviors to watch for (even over how much might profess how "dominant" they are). Anyone can say they are a "dominant", but if their actions contradict that, they will never be seen as a dominant - in this case, actions really do speak louder than words!
In my opinion, they are similar, but also very different, just as the focus of each role is different. They are similar in the manner you achieve the headspace from specific interactions and exchanges with others, but obviously, those specific interactions and exchanges are different for each role Read more… - where as a submissive may achieve subspace through being directed and commanded by their dominant, a little may achieve little space through acting at a younger age.
Of course, I concede that I don't actually include "daddies/mommies/littles" within BDSM, although certainly a viable fetish for some. No doubt it can cross over depending on the dynamic, itself, but on its own, I just don't see the similarities to include it inside BDSM.
Perhaps we should reconsider the vocabulary.
The terms "control" and "power" seem too vague in this application, often meaning consent or merely self discipline (for which both the dominant AND submissive should be equal in). For the sake of this discussion, let's instead consider the term Read more… "authority", the question then becoming "Whom has the authority?" If the submissive give her authority to the dominant, than it's easy to understand the dominant is in authority - the power or right to give orders, make decisions, and enforce obedience (Google definition).
Keep you chin up, first and foremost! Although it can feel like the end of the world with the loss of a d/s partner, I assure you, it's not. After my slave of seven years asked for her freedom to pursue an outside relationship I wouldn't condone, I thought for sure I was simply done. What I did Read more… instead was take a bit of time to myself so that I might reaccess my life and lifestyle goals. I used the time alone to improve upon myself without outside influences. I prepared myself for my next dynamic, not that it was certain there would be another, but more so that if it did, I could be in a place in which I was ready for the relationship.
Honestly, with no judgement on your previous dominant, it really seems like you weren't really getting what you needed/wanted from that dynamic, anyhow. Count yourself lucky! You had years to meet someone that couldn't seem to find the time to meet you, now you have the glorious freedom to begin again - hopefully with someone with the same priorities as you.