Housemate

[Deleted Member]

I've been living in this house for a few months now, and I realised very early on that I'm extremely attracted to one of my Housemates.

I find myself fantasising about both him and my partner fucking me- I tried to wait it out, see if the sexual attraction would go away with no success... So- instead I want to ask for help in how I can practically tell my Housemate (who currently knows nothing about my relationship dynamic) that I'm sexually attracted to him without causing any problems.

[Ar****]

What does your partner think about this?

[Mo****]

To go with the line put up by Arcues, what has your partner said when you raised it with him? And further to that, does your partner know fully about your interests in kink? Without him knowing about what you would like to happen, it is not a good thing for us to offer up advice, because what we offer MAY end up spoiling what you already have.

[ke****]

I say just bring it up to both of them

[Mo****]

12 minutes ago, keelo43 said:

I say just bring it up to both of them

Mate without knowing about the partner side of things, when you say raise it with both, you may potentially be putting the current situation at risk and losing both.

[Matttster]

If you are in a dynamic, I will make the assumption that your partner is OK with you pursuing your housemate. If not, that is where to start.

So assuming your partner is OK with it, I think you need to feel your housemate out to determine their feelings about threesomes and the type they may be interested in (mff or mmf for example). So perhaps starting a casual conversation about sex to try to determine your housemates general feelings about threesomes. Something like building the conversation to see if they have ever been in a threesome, if no, is it a fantasy or not. Then you will need to determine whether the person is open to a threesome with (assuming your partner is a man) with two men and a woman.

[Deleted Member]

I suppose its a case of unless you ask, you'll never find out, bring it up in a casual conversation would be the best option In my opinion, good luck

[MissTakenDeep]

I’m presuming because you’re not asking how to tell your partner, that your partner already knows and you’re wondering if the housemate would be up for it?
My honest opinion would be to be careful how you approach the housemate, it’s easy to presume he’d be flattered, but he might not be. I’d maybe mention your relationship is open and see if he then starts showing interest towards you. You’ve got to live with this man, so I’d say just becareful you don’t unintentionally make it difficult living conditions.

[xTx_or_Sir_John]

Hope it works out well for you. I was in a polyamory until recently when it fell apart. An increase in number or unbalanced strengths of emotion are always risky. Love x T x T x

[Deleted Member]

My partner is very aware, in fact he's the reason why I'm on this app to be sexually active. In a sense, we are sexually open but emotionally monogamous. Anyone who is brought in knows fully that it's a friendship/sexual relationship only.al relationship only.

[UK****]

I would start by being a little 'open' in conversations with the housemate (if the opportunity exists).  Let out that you are in an open sexual relationship.

After all, if they can't accept that is ok, then they are never going to be open to involvement.

They may ask questions to dig deeper into how you decide who you play with.  Then you can ask if they've even been in that sort of dynamic and if they have ever been in a threesome etc.

With luck the questions will naturally move onto a flirty conversation.  Then you can assess if you should raise it.

The issue you need to judge is if they aren't open to it and you offer it, will the dynamic with your housemate make living there a problem.  That's the downside, th upside of course is far nicer :-)

[Deleted Member]

A reminder. If this does not work out, you or he might have to move. Is this worth a chance of moving?.