Free use

[Ca****]

I wonder how common these free use fetishists are. I am intrigued by the idea of having such mastery over a partner that they don’t refuse anything. The idea of just being able to make use of each other casually and at will seems like it’d be quite fun.

[PhoenixRise]

My sub is free use. She will do as she is told, when she is told. Regardless of where we are. She trusts me to make good decisions. This also extends to others. She will service anyone I instruct her too. Although I'm to possessive and that doesn't happen often.

[ge****]

If you find them, or expect to find them then I'd respectfully suggest that 99.99% of the time both you and they are on the wrong lines and need to take a step back, or you're being scammed.
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There will always be boundaries and limits to mean that "they don't refuse anything" will never happen and anyone that tells you they have no boundaries and limits is either deluded or lying.
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About the only time you may have a situation where "free use" may exist safely is between two people that know each other very well and have agreed a Master/Mistress and slave type relationship, but even that will be guided by boundaries and limits that have been agreed.

[ey****]

I won't say they don't exist. But.

The majority of what you would call "free use" it's usually been something which has been worked up to as part of a relationship - the trust has to be there that in the subs willingness to never refuse, a trust that you would never ask of them something harmful (in a number of ways) or so on.   This is never going to be an instant thing and it could be a goal of a relationship but many won't make it that far and some of this is as much on you, as them.

There are environments which are usually a bit more fair game.

There are Femdom clubs which sometimes have either communal subs (which can be used by any lady for almost any reason) and some where the rules are that any sub is automatically communal if not already in service to someone - but limits often still apply.

On the flip there are CMnf style nights - but these are rarer and will usually be attended by M/f couples - some of which have subs who can be used by the other Dominants as seen fit - but usually there is a level of trust between everyone before they're given out.

[ca****]

This slave enjoys his mistress dictating his every use at whatever for whoever she decides
Who am I to refuse mistress commands

[ma****]

I seriously wonder why people write these things yet never meet with people that have same situations..

[Deleted Member]

In my personal opinion. If I sub says “you can do anything you want” is dangerous. What if he wants to cut you just to watch you bleed? Boundaries are a must when I play.

[ey****]

4 hours ago, massageTherapist said:

I seriously wonder why people write these things yet never meet with people that have same situations..

Because it's mostly said by fantasists.

And that can be either side of the slash

So the idea you can say something to someone and they will do *anything* you ask is hot as Hell - but it's thwart with it's own problems and is something which is a destination rather than a starting a point

and the kinda subs who use this as a starting point.... "I'll do anything" - OK, sell your possessions, a slave does not need possessions, send all the *** to me a slave does not need ***... what, this isn't what you want?  

[PhoenixRise]

4 hours ago, Torrie said:

In my personal opinion. If I sub says “you can do anything you want” is dangerous. What if he wants to cut you just to watch you bleed? Boundaries are a must when I play.

This is key. Good communication. If my sub says I can do whatever I want I know where the line is and what she enjoys/won't tolerate!!

[ge****]

5 hours ago, carlisle177 said:

This slave enjoys his mistress dictating his every use at whatever for whoever she decides
Who am I to refuse mistress commands

So you'd not refuse if your Mistress wanted you to have "Cum Dump" tattooed across your forehead? Or perhaps wanted you to amputate a finger that she could wear on a chain round her neck?
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Extreme examples I know, but there to make the point that you have it within your power to refuse her plenty of things if she stepped outside your boundaries and limits.

[po****]

6 hours ago, Torrie said:

In my personal opinion. If I sub says “you can do anything you want” is dangerous. What if he wants to cut you just to watch you bleed? Boundaries are a must when I play.

in any kind of play there must be SOME blundaries... I've had an experience where it's been a "Do anything" but I know where the limits are from discussion and trust with the partner. it's all contextual (and obviously consensual even if CNC)

[Deleted Member]

6 hours ago, Torrie said:

In my personal opinion. If I sub says “you can do anything you want” is dangerous. What if he wants to cut you just to watch you bleed? Boundaries are a must when I play.

Definitely 

[ey****]

55 minutes ago, pocklington134 said:

in any kind of play there must be SOME blundaries... I've had an experience where it's been a "Do anything" but I know where the limits are from discussion and trust with the partner. it's all contextual (and obviously consensual even if CNC)

this feels a bit similar from another thread

but

We all have limits in the sense there are things we are physically or otherwise limited to do

I guess for an anecdote - there's a guy I met who is a bit of an extreme masochist and he build all sorts of weird and wonderful devices.  Some of the things he does he has been working towards for years and he also has a lot of upper body strength

A few of his contraptions literally involve someone hammering nails through his nipples into a plank of wood 

Now, he has been training his nipples for this for years - most people are not going to be able to get a sizeable nail through their nipples, certainly not enough to properly support a plank of wood

It also involves a lot of upper body strength him avoiding the plank from dropping - quite simply for most people if they dropped the wood, through it's weights, they are going to tear their nippes and need a trip to A&E

Now, obviously there is a trust a Dominant isn't going to tell you do something daft like that - but - someone incorrectly bigging themselves up

But, another one...

anal / strap on /fisting

an acquaintance of mine has been struggling with hospital after he ruptured his colon during anal - now, he is someone who has anal trained for years and can take huge toys.

I have come across too many people who have either tried to ram oversized toys in people or talk up the size that should be pushed into them - we all have a physical limitation on what we can take and going too big too quickly can cause serious damage and be life threatening

So yes. No matter how willing. No matter how much you want to talk up... whatever... we all have limits.

It is important we only engage with people who respect these - even in CNC or 'slave' arrangements. 

[Deleted Member]

The way I see it; a Slave will do anything, including “jump off that cliff”.
But with the understanding that their Master is _not_ going to order them to jump.
Their Master might order them to do things they don’t want to often, but ultimately their Master will protect them.

The trust to give up your freedom completely comes over time.
It is a goal, not a starting point.

[Su****]

Honestly, I’m into it. I’d really enjoy that. But I feel like with the wrong person things can go really bad.
Guess it all depends on if you trust that person fully or not.

[Ir****]

In my experience, free use was a lengthy conversation ahead of time. The person I was with was very aroused by just being used at my discretion but had some things they didn't want to be surprised with (They were also shy so not in public). These boundaries would change as they became more comfortable with certain things. Its like everything with cnc arrangements, communication and consent needs to be crystal clear. But once that is established... yeah... its as ***istic as you can get!!! Big fan personally!

[Ca****]

Tuesday at 11:34 PM, Ironhide said:

In my experience, free use was a lengthy conversation ahead of time. The person I was with was very aroused by just being used at my discretion but had some things they didn't want to be surprised with (They were also shy so not in public). These boundaries would change as they became more comfortable with certain things. Its like everything with cnc arrangements, communication and consent needs to be crystal clear. But once that is established... yeah... its as ***istic as you can get!!! Big fan personally!

I would imagine this is closer to reality. This is my first post and I was vague, as I’m just dabbling in fetish stuff. I, not being the sadist type, wasn’t thinking in terms of danger or intending to hurt anyone. I was in the mindset of more vanilla stuff, but given this community, I know there are some people that have way different definitions than I do, and also people that have to be careful of ill-intentioned predators that sneak into these communities. So I appreciate the thoughtful responses.