Public signs a person may enjoy BDSM

[Deleted Member]

I was always curious, are there any general tells or indications an individual may like kink sex which they display in general Public?

Im only interested in women but in my case I can't really think of anything I do which would show my interest in sexual domination. Is there an appropriate way to hint at it in a general setting?

In any relationship sitting down eventually and talking about your kinks is required, but I'm considering better ways to prefilter and select women who are more likely to share my interests before I get to that point.

[Deleted Member]

I have seen some people wear badges/buttons and stuff with symbols, and sometimes at pride parades I have seen people publicly presenting themselves as kinky. But in daily life, I think it’s hard to tell. If you’re looking for real life contacts, I think events and stuff are the best way to go, though I also wonder if there’s some other way

[da****]

There are a few signs for people who are really into the lifestyle. There is the ring of O and the triskelion. There is also day wear for subs. Good subs should wear their collar everywhere but their leather collar may not be appropriate so there are chains they can wear in public.

[DonnaH]

I love having a secret sex life. No one who knows me knows anything about any of this

[Deleted Member]

8 minutes ago, DonnaH said:

I love having a secret sex life. No one who knows me knows anything about any of this

I honestly would prefer to be completely open but saying you're into restraining women and making them orgasm has a potential to cause some very uncomfortable conversation in a general setting 😂.

Edited June 27, 2022 by Deleted Member

[ey****]

walking down the street you would have no idea.

While someone might have a shirt with a triskelion on, there's every chance they just thought it was a cool design

someone might wear a collar cos they are submissive (and, usually an owned sub) or cos they're Goth or punk or just like the fashion.

Unless someone is wearing something explicit (say a t-shirt like "cum inside me, hubby will clean it up later" - which do exist) then there's not really anyway to tell.

----

but in public there is a way to spot someone who is kinky - like if they happen to be buying something in a sex shop or are in a munch or fetish club 

[Deleted Member]

They might wear a clinging to the neck close fitting heavily starched stiff collar formal shirt, with a very tightly snuggly knotted necktie in place to add further restriction. The neck is very sensual. Shirt collars these days can be very strict and high, I.e 2 button or 3 button collars rather than a 1 button collar so somewhat severe and challenging to wear, especially all day long from morning to night.

Such strict and tight and restrictive stiff extreme no wiggle room fitting shirt collars that wrap and cling around the neck are essentially a form of predicament bondage. When I wear a tight shirt collar If someone speaks to me I can't for instance just turn my neck to face them, I can even turn  my head around I have to actually swivel my whole body around.

In an office or business setting the very wearer can go unnoticed as an actively participating bondage enthusiast right under peoples noses in the public arena. Wonderful really???!!!!

Edited June 27, 2022 by Deleted Member

[BigPolly]

13 hours ago, dallas809 said:

Good subs should wear their collar everywhere

Not all subs wear collars in or out of the bedroom. 

[sm****]

in the past lots used to use the triscilion symbol as in my profile pic, but over time it's become a lot more mainstream even though the people wearing it have no intentions of being in the scene and can easily be confused as a lot now take it on as a celtic style fashion item. 

The same for collars, it's become a fashion item now and becoming  a more grey area trying to distinguish who is or isn't.

Edited June 30, 2022 by smeagol

[oldsauerkraut]

Being new to the Lifestyle I also wonder ?? I notice the Goth Movement with makup and clothing.. I wonder if Piercing and Tattoos identify BDSM leanings ..  At least for some, Which is the hard part .. Human nature being what it is makes it very difficult to separate and define the individual ..

[sm****]

23 hours ago, oldsauerkraut said:

Being new to the Lifestyle I also wonder ?? I notice the Goth Movement with makup and clothing.. I wonder if Piercing and Tattoos identify BDSM leanings ..  At least for some, Which is the hard part .. Human nature being what it is makes it very difficult to separate and define the individual ..

in the distant past it might have been a bit of a  sign/clue, but they have become so mainstream now as fashion it's muddied the waters quite a lot.  Even in my home i know quite a lot of the scene but you wouldn't know this as they just look, dress and act the same as the nillas in public.  Last month there was someone sporting a cull on metal and O ring collar, but they were as nilla as Mary Whitehouse lol

[oldsauerkraut]

That does make things difficult ..  But there is an inventive individual out there that will come up with a small signal to pass the message ..  Then the community just needs to adopt it ..