Sub life

[Deleted Member]

What are people thoughts on 24/7 submissive what are your pros and cons of it

[to****]

Not for me. Don’t go for TPE either. I want my sub/partner to live her own life, fulfill her goals and dreams. I’ll help if possible.

[Deleted Member]

Best thing ever 🥲

[Cheekysub247]

I personally need a 24/7 relationship as this has been me all my life and no switch off valve.
Pros and cons are there for everything and everyone, depends on the individuals involved and the arrangements they have.
Some People still have careers in a 24/7, still have children ect. Personally for the type of 24/7 i need i would have to wait until my son has flown the nest.

[EMandM]

A few people seem to like the idea, until it maybe becomes life, then it wears thin after a couple of weeks. Only done online 24/7 Domming, it's hard work! ☺️

[PandoraNuada]

Here's the problem for me. When does a kink become abuse? When it's a 24/7? When he's "just being a Dom" and 18 things have already went to sh*t and I *really* don't need his a** adding to my stress. Then it would start to irritate me to the point that I would f**king drop his a**. If I am not in an emotional state to have him be an a**hole (because adding to my stress right then is being an a**hole) will make me hate him because he is never emotionally supportive.

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, PandoraNuada said:

Here's the problem for me. When does a kink become abuse? When it's a 24/7? When he's "just being a Dom" and 18 things have already went to sh*t and I *really* don't need his a** adding to my stress. Then it would start to irritate me to the point that I would f**king drop his a**. If I am not in an emotional state to have him be an a**hole (because adding to my stress right then is being an a**hole) will make me hate him because he is never emotionally supportive.

I think that’s where a good balance comes to play coz sometimes for me even as a dom it’s hard to keep the dominance up without feeling like is it to much so for me personally the communication after a kink session is key and after care is always a key even in 24/7 but this is my opinion on it

[Deleted Member]

I'd just like to point out, based on some of what's been said in just the few comments already...

Being a 24/7 submissive doesn't automatically make you a slave with no choices, that you are their object & not a person & that your dom will be an inconsiderate ass hole who will abuse & bully you - it also doesn't mean your sub can't have a life, can't have family, can't have a career, can't have goals, targets & dreams for their lives & to suggest so, shows a lack of knowledge & understanding & frankly is talking utter crap

[No****]

Then find a proper Dom. Most think being abusive and being forceful is what being a Dom Is all about when it is not.

A real Dom does care about his/her partner and many will dispute this.

They respect the others wants and needs and if they match in Kinks then it’s the better experience for both.

[Deleted Member]

14 minutes ago, NorskViking said:

Then find a proper Dom. Most think being abusive and being forceful is what being a Dom Is all about when it is not.

A real Dom does care about his/her partner and many will dispute this.

They respect the others wants and needs and if they match in Kinks then it’s the better experience for both.

For a dom sub to work efficiently there has to be the trust and respect I totally agree with you a dom that dosent respect there sub are they even a dom yes there is some aspects of kink that make it seem like there is no respect but that’s where the trust and respect are most vital

[to****]

Exactly correct, NordkViking. A Real Dom adjusts to his sub as well. Every body, every personality, everyone’s emotions, are different.
Want to be the best Dom possible? Learn your sub and adjust your approach.

[No****]

Learning to adjust is important also.

But during vetting you get to know each other your likes and dislikes.

During vetting and you agree to meet up for a coffee and talk more then you can hash out anything that’s on your mind.


Once vetting is done and you both have an agreement then you should proceed.

Never end vetting unless you are certain as your safety is number priority!

Trust-Loyalty-Respect and Care.


Only if someone wants someone to be an ass to them or be abusive is that acceptable if it’s what they wanted.

Remember you can adjust to your Sub and their needs at any stage; but make sure these are followed at all times.

Trust-Loyalty-Respect and Care.

[Deleted Member]

I mean, just like all things kink, it comes down to the individuals. For me personally, I could never be part of a 24/7 lifestyle, but that's because my day to day attitude and demeanor is very laid back. I only like to bring out the more dom side when it's time.

But for some, there's probably a huge appeal to have someone take control of all aspects of their life for them.

The biggest thing I would think, is exactly what has been said...respect and care for the sub.
Controlling aspects of your subs life, is not the same as being an ass about all aspects of your subs life.

One thing I think would be very important, is make sure he/she has a friend outside the relationship who still knows about what is going on.
While granted, if she doesn't feel comfortable enough to tell you that she isn't ok with something that's happening, then you've messed up as a dom...but always make sure she still has someone to go to that could also fill you in that the sub is having an issue.

[Da****]

19 hours ago, PandoraNuada said:

Here's the problem for me. When does a kink become abuse? When it's a 24/7? When he's "just being a Dom" and 18 things have already went to sh*t and I *really* don't need his a** adding to my stress. Then it would start to irritate me to the point that I would f**king drop his a**. If I am not in an emotional state to have him be an a**hole (because adding to my stress right then is being an a**hole) will make me hate him because he is never emotionally supportive.

I would suggest you setup a safeword for the days when you need a partner not your Dom...or you need some leeway.

[BadDesires]

I think the fantasy of 24/7 sounds fun but I expect the reality could prove more challenging. A lot of it would probably depend on having the right partner. Then I'd expect building up in bursts starting with a few weekends, then a week and so on. If you begin to miss it then you can choose to go longer if the rest of life allows it. External factors could always be accounted for within your dynamic.

[Quikin]

I’ve been 24/7/365, from 1980 till present, it’s like any other relationship, you don’t just jump in head first, we were together for 5 years before going 24/7, and no things don’t always go smoothly but you sit and talk them through.
I will add that quite a few of my friends are also in 24/7/365.

[ey****]

one of the things about 24/7 is that it is a generic phrase.

It can represent different structures to different people - so I guess a simple downside is two people not being on the same wavelength

The other thing is that some people see 24/7 as either a holy grail or a starting point - and certainly if it's people not used to this it can be a recipe for disaster - and of course the whole concept of looking down on other structures is toxic.

Now; to spin things.  I am married, this 24/7.  We are still married when I am at work. We are still married when they are out.  We are married when we're having sex together... and married when I am f**king someone else... or they are f**king someone else - we're married when I'm having drinks with a prospective partner. We're married when they're with their girlfriend.    You get the picture.

Of course; there are rules and boundaries we follow at all times.

24/7 in D/s terms is not dissimilar - but I think some have unrealistic expectations and/or think it should be done a certain way.   And, the level of protocol can vary between relationships and this is all valid.

It can be exhausting for both or either party to feel they have to be a certain way or have to respond in certain ways : it can also be very easy for one or both to ease out a little over time which can negatively affect the other.   Relationship challenges happen in every relationship but adding an extra layer is likely to involve extra work.  

[Mz****]

For some 24/7 isn't possible due to living arrangements, kids if single parenting and some don't want the dynamic 24/7. There are pros,cons and personal choice. Each dynamic picks what is right for them. It is not the holy grail or the only way

[Go****]

It’s a lot of responsibility for both parties. I wouldn’t doubt that the pressures and weight of it all could become quite cumbersome if it’s not a true calling.