Demisexual

[Du****]

Are there any demisexual people here? How do you go about finding your kinky person?

Happy to receive advice from men or women.

[Deleted Member]

I'm just honest from the get-go. I both have it on my profile and make it clear in chats if necessary. Like if someone starts talking with normal conversation and I decide I'd like to engage, I don't bring it up. But if they come in trying to send me pics, get pics from me, have me watch them, immediately meet up to fuck, etc., I politely let them know why I wouldn't get any pleasure from it as they would. Zero shame as to what they like, to each their own, I just don't operate the same way. Then I just wish them happy hunting lol.

[Deleted Member]

Even the demis don’t know! It’s a lottery. Make lots of friends... 👍

[3u****]

I often find myself trying to gratify people in the hopes of making a connection. But I can tell you that approach has not worked.

[lo****]

August 23, 3u33les said:

I often find myself trying to gratify people in the hopes of making a connection. But I can tell you that approach has not worked.

I tried that a while when I was young, before I wound up taking a HUGE step back to examine myself and figure out why I was getting almost no pleasure from my encounters.
I literally was solo for 5 years, because I was so fed up with the whole casual encounter thing.
Hate it still. I need more. If it works for others, more power to them. I'm just not wired for it to make me happy.
As to the question of what pings my interest? Every person is different. 2 different people can approach using the same or very similar ways, but only one may feel to us like someone we can connect to. It's VERY rare for us to immediately connect to someone on a level that we would be able to be both intimate and happy, and many loose patience with us before we are ready, or even tragically just as we start really thinking about them in those terms. That's a huge disappointment, but it helps to tell yourself if they were in too much of a hurry for you to get comfortable enough they were not meant to be the one for you.