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Time to move on..

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It is with great sadness that when my membership runs out in December...I will not renew....This website is really good for chatting ..etc...but to meet other members it is so difficult to work out how..Alot of members have mentioned Fet life....It is so much more personal..Where Fetish.com fail..is on the contact side...It is for that reason alone ....I will not be renewing my membership..!..I have tried my best in trying to work out how the contact side works...but it is an area that needs an awful lot of development...So...thank you to everyone who replied to my posts etc...but what I am after....Fetish.com cannot fulfil...meeting local members...whether for friendship....or anything else...Bye....


Hi, Cassie!
I'm sorry to hear you've found the dating part of Fetish.com difficult. Please let me know if you have any questions on how something works, or if there is anything concrete on the site you would suggest changing and how. I'm happy to clarify or try and help you out so that you can hopefully get a better experience when it comes to meeting new people. 

I think a bigger problem is that most of the girls I've encountered on here want cash, regardless of their role. I've met two that were genuine, all the rest are after piggies, or are men LOL
Hope you find what you’re looking for @Cassie34 I guess you encounter problems on all sites whether it be bdsm or online dating. For me Fetlife was the opposite of what you’re finding, the women were ok but the men were all in competition with each other, all thinking they’re something they’re not & I found a lot of bitchyness on there however yes it is great for meets & the social side of things. On here, from a female prospective I find people are wanting to learn & gain advice which is nice. There are a few dickheads but the majority are listening, learning or speaking about their own experiences. It’s so friendly & yes it is more of an online social than a ‘let’s meet’ site but it also has a closeness that I love & some on here are meeting up. Good luck with your new adventures @Cassie34 & maybe we’ll see you back here again one day x
Fetlife I find is very much the opposite but that’s just my vuew

It is so nice to get well meaning replies...wishes..etc...I still have a month before my membership runs out...Not only that, but I still have a lot of points to use up..

Alot of members come across as having partners , playmates..etc...

Is my profile, interview to blame...

Is it because members are wary...I mean..one can say anything about ones self..when looking to make friends...I can appreciate how careful one has to be...one can take all the precautions when meeting for the first time , but how does one get to that stage..Is that person genuine..is he or she who they say they are...Are they looking for something they have not mentioned..

There are so many contact websites...same members...same photos..different names...different locations...all owned and registered at one address in Guernsey...One of those contact websites..at the very end of company details..terms of use mentioned that they use computer generated photos as a way of protecting members..From What...I could spend ages chatting on line to a computer generated female and get automated replies...

I do not want to register with 4 or 5 websites , all offering contact details...I want one website that caters for the whole spectrum ..tastes..lifestyles we all live or want to live ..A website I can trust..

I know Fetish.com is not a contact website and what little there is on that side does not work very well..difficult to use..and does not operate as a contact website within fetish.com..It looks like an after thought..an add on..not thought out.!

There must be so many members who are looking for friends playmates..LTR'S.  not just on-line but in real life..!...It is so so difficult to  meet someone who shows an interest in meeting another member..

Someone mentioned " Money " being asked for..!...I cannot remember how many times I got messages that started off really well..led to money being Asked for..

I even asked a few times..why won't you continue chatting using Fetish.com...Reply I got..FU2..

Deep down I know I would regret not renewing my membership..but I feel that I am left with an on-line presence and nothing else.!

I want to be able to ring a Kinky friend...fancy a coffee etc...maybe with a movie..etc...It is not asking for the earth.!...

I do not want to mislead other members..in why I want to meet other members, develop friendships..

I wonder if this reply could be posted across the Forums..Not everyone looks at all the Forums...It might give Fetish.com a better insight into the failings of an attempt to incorporate  a contact / dating side..within the website...that does not work..!






it'd be a shame to see you go - but ultimately you've got to make sure you're making the best use of your time (and/or money) towards heading in the right direction.

Some points from my view.

- you don't need a paid membership to be on this site.

whilst certainly there are restrictions if you don't, it's not mandatory.  You can also trade in "points" for mini memberships also

- Fetlife (for example) has it's own ups and downs.

One of the few advantages fetlife has to here is volume of people, but than itself creates it's own problems.  It is a little bit better for seeing which events are on and if you find a regionalised board it's a good place to sometimes interact with other people locally - but - messaging random people is certainly more frowned up and more likely to be ignored as a lot of people regularly find their inboxes filled with crap from strangers - so it can be difficult to "stand out" if you're not otherwise known.  Also, when it comes to money - at least on here people with a financial interest are supposed to be marked with a € - I've found fetlife to be far worse for having a conversation with someone and out of the blue gifts or money coming up.  

It (like here) can be a good supplement to real life - but don't expect it to be a quick win or replacement.


Thanks for your reply...It does not solve my problem in how to meet other local Kinsters on a personal level...Don't get me wrong..I do have friends ...but not within the "Scene"...that is what I hope to find...I do not know what I am doing wrong...is it my profile...or is it my interview...or my settings to do with who I receive messages from...My Adds on the BDSM dating side  stay available for about 1 to 2 hours...then disappear..!...I do not want an on-line supplement to real life...The support and replies I get are really appreciated..On line friendship is also  priceless but, I want an on line contact /dating system that works..!..is easy to use and navigate and can  lead to a real life friendships..etc..I am very Tech savvy...thinking about setting up my own dating website...maybe in conjunction with Fetish .com...!

Cassie...I know I am coming across as angry...well...maybe not Angry....more disappointed..!....Sorry...


I think I mentioned to you a while ago that there is a munch in Croydon near where you live - it's honestly the quickest and easiest way to meet people, in your local area, who have a kinky interest.


Thank you...You did and I forgot that you did.!


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