Sub or Slave, what's the difference ?

[Deleted Member]

I've been thinking on this a lot lately, what is the difference between labeling yourself as a submissive versus slave? How do you know whether you're a slave or submissive? I used to consider myself just a really good submissive but now I realize I may just be a slave with opinions sometimes. I'm not sure how to differ the two or how to label myself, sub or slave?

[Julesz]

A slave once agreeing to the contract of being your slave and all that goes with it no longer has a right to say no. A submissive can always say no respectfully (with good reason). That's the easiest way of defining the difference.

[Ni****]

I mean technically it’s up to interpretation but I believe subs are more of a volunteer as a slave is not. Or the fact that a slave is submissive but a sub isn’t always a slave there’s a degree of separation between the two. Hope that helps it’s early my mind isn’t sharp right now

[Deleted Member]

Traditional response would be something like:

A sub makes choices on whether to serve/obey within each instance.

A slave has made that decision only once.

…but I do find that a bit dated. Consent is an ongoing deal, and shifts in circumstances can certainly mean reassessing that commitment (otherwise you’re bought into a potentially abusive Master).

So I feel it’s more a frame of mind and an ideal/standard which is set between both parties, where a slave really has shifted the power and decision making entirely to the Master. But it varies from arrangement to arrangement on any case.

[bl****]

⬆️ correct

[DeviantInside]

Much like everythjing else in this world... it varies from person to person. Every dynamic will be slightly different and everyone wil have their own interpretation of what either term means. For some the are synonymous, for others completely different. For some they have an inherent attraction to one label and/or an inherent anhorance of the other. For some sub can mean more of a play partner and slave mean more of a commitment, particularly with a collaring cermony etc (which again has varied levels of meaning and commitment from person to person). I have used the term slave in committed relationships to change from a play partner to a 24/7 (ish) "no limits, no rights, no safeword"... but those are very much in inverted commas because the reality is they knew I would look after them and trusted me to do so... and knew that if it came right down to it they knew I would listen and stop and that they could stop things at any moment. So that was only done after trust and understanding was built up anyway, I would be wary of that sort of edge play until you really know the other person a lot better, if at all, I'd be particularly wary of anyone who pushes for it from the off. Some people use contracts, some don't. Some interchange slave with service submission. There is a whole myriad of potential meanings and understandings, so work out what you feel it means for you and what appeals to you more and then communicate with your partner what it means for your individual dynamic.

Edited November 16, 2022 by DeviantInside
typo

[Deleted Member]

Being a sub is more of who you are personality wise. Being a slave is a submissive action or something you actually are doing for your dom at his request within the boundaries you both set.

[Ch****]

How about a sub with slave tendencies 😊
Just know what you it all means to you and make it clear to who you speak to.
Slaves can have hard limits x x

[en****]

Whilst I would agree the definition of submissive vs slave is easiest in terms of the limits, safewords and ability to say no etc which is quantifiable.
There could be other less easily defined elements such as the level of ***/*** involved meaning that the term slave seems a more relevant descriptor but with still the limits etc more associated with a submissive. (it might just be me but I sometimes associate the term slave with *** etc and submissive with more elegant bondage kinds of activities), basically are you using the term to describe who you are, what you do or just what you want to be referred to as irrelevant of the first two.

[Deleted Member]

Both can mean the exact same thing to some people, while others would say they are entirely independant roles. At the end of the day its what they mean to you. But for a very broad definition, slave would be a role based more around servitude of their d-type, as opposed to being submissive to a d-type. But the term slave would fall under the general umbrella of submissive.

[Lord_Talion]

A slave is a type of sub where as sub is an umbrella term that covers all types of subs. Just like Masterbis a type of Dom where as Dom is an umbrella term that covers all types of Doms

[sh****]

To @kinkywitchbitch A lot of people have that problem the way I figured when I was being in that situation that you have been is do you like having the power over that person more than being controlled over someone else I love being the power over that person it turns me on more than anything else in the world that's how I figured that I am a mistress

[ma****]

A bottom - someone who only submit during sex or certain scenes.

A submissive - someone who has is naturally a submissive in general in a relationship (they don't submit just in bedroom, but out of it too). They usually want to keep some areas of their life they keep control on. For example, parenting is one area that I refuse giving up control, or body modification or my finances.

A slave is someone who has got no limits and no safewords AND a slave is a property. Unless someone is a M/s dynamic, they are not slaves. A single person can never call themselves a slave. A submissive can only become a slave in the moment they enter a M/s dynamic (and M/s dynamics should only develop from a D/s dynamic, after at least of a few years of power exchange dynamic with their Dom). There are TPE dynamics too where the sub gives up control all her limits and doesn't have safewords, but they aren't properties; in that case, they are just submissive even if it's a TPE dynamic.

[Ma****]

1 hour ago, TheHandThatFeeds said:

Both can mean the exact same thing to some people, while others would say they are entirely independant roles. At the end of the day its what they mean to you. But for a very broad definition, slave would be a role based more around servitude of their d-type, as opposed to being submissive to a d-type. But the term slave would fall under the general umbrella of submissive.

I disagree with "it may mean something different to some". Yes indeed but that doesn't make it right.
And "what they mean to you"
It a definition and definitions make up our language which gives us ability to communicate.
Its a very popular modern thing these days to "fill in your own definitions"
So what the world defines as red I define as blue.
Gay is attracted to the same sex, not what it means to someone.
If we all start filling in our own definitions then our communication is lost.
Slave is a definition.
Like you said it falls under the umbrella term sub.

Where a slave gives more power to her/his Master.
A slave gives up more control to her/his Master.
A slave is lifestyle, where submissive could remain some power or control at certain areas /times/exceptions.

[VK****]

Quite a lot of definitions here and when I explain it to Subs I tend to split it into a few definitions. Firstly it's more Subserviance than Submission, the slave denies herself to serve her master. Then there is the BDSM loose term of it being a 24/7 arrangement versus the Gorean Kajira type slave, collars, numerous positions, ways to address her Master etc, which can be bedroom only.
Google
Gor Wiki
ontario gorean assembly
For more info on the Kajira dynamic.

[LS****]

I think of “slave” as a subcategory of “sub.” When referring to a sub as a slave, I think there are implications of certain power dynamics like ***, punishment, denial and service. Of course it’s subjective, but I would treat a sub very differently if she labeled herself a “slave” as opposed to something like “service sub.”

[MrJim]

I think the main difference between sub and slave is the amount of time spent living the lifestyle, slaves tend to be 24/7 and subs are usually just in the bedroom

[Ch****]

The way it was explained to me was that a submissive would not jump off a cliff if told, a slave would.
.
So a slave should only became a slave once they have complete faith in their master/mistress.

[Deleted Member]

I see it as a continuum ... The more one is toward the slave end of the continuum the greater the surrender of what the power and control encompassed over the life of the sub/slave to the Master or Mistress

[uc****]

Which are you kinky witch?

[Deleted Member]

A slave is usually someone looking for a 24/7 relationship. I’m looking for a slave. I submissive could be anyone from someone who likes to bottom, to a masochist, to someone who wants to be dominated and may or may not want a relationship. At least that’s how I look at those words.

[sa****]

Submissive sounds more consensual and less “degrading” than slave. In my opinion 😉

[ma****]

12 hours ago, MrJim said:

I think the main difference between sub and slave is the amount of time spent living the lifestyle, slaves tend to be 24/7 and subs are usually just in the bedroom

If someone likes submitting just in bedroom, they are bottoms not submissives. Submissives tend to be 24/7. The difference is that submissive keep their limits and safewords, while the slaves don't have any apart of those of their Masters. Also, slaves are properties.

[MrJim]

I think of it this way a slave is a sub but a sub is not necessarily a slave. A sub may only want occasional play, a slave wants every aspect of their lives under control.

[MrJim]

@maryioni, not always my slaves can use a safe word anytime they feel they need to. Slaves just tend to keep the persona in the real world not just at home, yes we say they are property but they are people and treasures to be cherished. So they are not ***d or mistreated