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It’s not… (consent)


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It’s not consent if…

I’m too inebriated to say no or know what I’m doing or know what’s happening

I’m in a physical, mental or emotional state where I may not remember the following day or where I can be persuaded

you need to cajole me in to it

you manipulate me

I'm scared to say no

I'm scared of the repercussions

I'm doing it to prevent a fight

it’s “because that’s what married/couples do”

I don’t want it

In short it’s not consent unless I explicitly say it is consent.

I shouldn’t be made to feel I’m not good enough or that I’ve done something wrong by saying no or stopping.

There shouldn’t be a (petty) argument about something unrelated because I’ve said no.

You do not have the right to be pissed off with me for making a decision. Likewise I shouldn’t fear that side of you and take it into consideration to influence my decision.

In simple terms unless I say yes and understand what I’m saying yes to it isn’t consent.

I shouldn’t have to ask to not be abused, it shouldn’t have taken me this many years to realise that what I was doing was wrong and the way I was being manipulated was wrong. But it has and I can’t change that.

What I can do though is try to put myself first in future and make decisions based on me and my feelings, thoughts, wants, needs and desires.

If you want to join me for the journey - great. But we both need to actively consent.

Wow that's a lot of info for the very simple answer of
These are my boundaries if they can't be respected by u then I can't be with you
Wow u have broken this down for me btw thamks . I didn't know this either x
Unfortunately, it’s all too easy to get drunk on power
Sad that ppl have to post this , everyone should kno wat consent is wats goin on in this world
If its not a "hell yes" its a no
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