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Dealing with bad interactions


br****

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Posted
It’s been hit or miss for me. A couple of great experiences
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Honestly only recently I've only been able to meet and talk in person to people but honestly keep at it you only truly give up when you stop trying
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A lot of people don't have social skills. I'm new on here, so far I've made a connection for cyber domming and made a plans to meet a different person for a vetting/intro drink. They deleted their account so, yeah! Mostly I just get ignored.
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Personally I find no one ever talks on here, or hear stories of bad interactions in the lobby chats, I just turn off my phone and sleep or go out shopping
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Never met any through this or any other fet app. I meet most fet partners on tinder (I have an openly kink friendly profile). This app in particular seems terrible for accounts that just disappear
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Sorry to hear that! One of the problems I’ve been having is that the people I actually connect with and want to meet are too far away for irl. I’ve been hearing from other kinksters that there is a lot of toxicity from massagers (esp male to female) so you’re not alone, but that sucks. But I can say that I’ve made genuine connections here and have found it to be worth the time spent.
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Hey BK, I’ve met a few people from this app, and each time it took a few important ingredients:
1. A Dom who leads the interaction and can work out/focus on logistics
2. A sub who is happy to help work out/focus on logistics
3. A willingness from both parties to want to meet
4. Mutual respect (some guys/girls/nbs lack this skill)
5. Recognizing that “getting to know each other” is better done in person (in semi public if desired) than over silly texting (70% of communication being nonverbal and all that)
Usually it takes me, a guy, about a month on average to actually meet someone when searching. For a girl, it’s likely to take much less time but it’s more important to filter for the guys who aren’t off the rocker
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It is a normal thing here, so many fake subds and doms. But I don’t lose the hope
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Nobody wants to talk and find out anything about anyone. I've messaged many women on here in 5 years, most will just come look at your profile and say nothing. I've had very few ever make the rare first interaction, I could count on one hand. Nobody is willing to put in time or effort with conversation....this is the instant world we have,it doesn't work too well
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I've met three subs/bottoms from this site, and played (more than once) with two of them. I've also met non-playmate contacts. Politeness, respect, flexibility and practicality are the key elements in early chats. I've been disappointed too often to expect great things but I enter each new possibility with optimism.
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I feel that that’s the danger of online connections. You don’t know the state of mind of the other person and it’s really hard to tell what the other persons mind is when they go through somebody else’s profile. I’m sorry that you have to deal with that. On the other side, I get something similar where there’s no interactions where there is interaction and then block for no reason at all or maybe not replying fast enough it’s always unclear. My perspective as a man there’s times when I jump on this and I am aggressively horny, other times I just wanna talk to new people. Hopefully whatever I said, helps you better navigate.
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I've developed a few friends on here, but it's taken a while, started a few conversations that have petered out, sent many hellos with no replies, there are people out there interested in chatting, and meeting, just have to find them.

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Personal experience. I've been on this app for over a year. I've met 2 playmates. Dated one for a while and went on 2 dates with the second who ghosted me afterwards. Recently I was messaging with someone and it seemed to be going very well and then they dropped off the face of the earth. Shortly after that I've had issues with scammers also. All dating apps are like this unfortunately. Every app presents itself as "different" they are all plagued by these issues. Don't feel discouraged. You are just going to have to be proactive. Good luck and stay safe out there!
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Yeah, I know what you mean, I came here hoping to find my Goddess to worship at night, and instead, I get left on read with no reply. I think people don't like to read or write; but how else will you connect if you won't even right back.
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My experience seems to be unusual from what I see here. Have had a lot of what is described here, certainly. Have a few people that I have been talking with, and a small number that I have met in person (both to vet and play). Haven't really tried out other apps, so maybe I need to look on those also. I would say that things have gone well overall with the people that I have met with. I'm a relative newb to the online dating thing (much less so to BDSM overall), but I find that there are people here that want to connect and develop different types of relationships. Maybe because I'm new to this, my expectations are modest.

This online stuff is pretty odd to me, and I'm still working to understand how it all works. The anonymity seems to both breed some disconnection and some individuals feeling comfortable approaching and talking to others in ways that they wouldn't in person. Those may be the bad interactions you are describing. I'm sorry that you have had so much of that. Really, I'm sorry that each of the people who've responded have had that.

I have some people that I will probably only ever meet over chat, but we have had engaging discussions. Some that we may only vet and then we may not get to the next step. And so far, 4 that I've had the pleasure of playing with in the last year and some months. That, for me, is a pretty good average.
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The "sensation" of pic exchanges and cyberfun or having bad interactions?
If it's the former, I don't participate or enjoy either.
If it's the latter...I've went from first starting and giving everyone the time of day, trying to be as polite in my replies as possible, to just not giving that same energy out to any and every message, especially when rude or immediately sexual.
ive
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19 minutes ago, LittleSoulTease said:
The "sensation" of pic exchanges and cyberfun or having bad interactions?
If it's the former, I don't participate or enjoy either.
If it's the latter...I've went from first starting and giving everyone the time of day, trying to be as polite in my replies as possible, to just not giving that same energy out to any and every message, especially when rude or immediately sexual.
ive

I've also started to go on this and other social media/dating apps less, which has honestly helped me a lot. That, alongside reassuring myself, I don't HAVE to reply to every single message, and immediately, all of the time. Not pressuring myself internally has made a huge difference!
I hope this helps if that's the question here and hope things improve.

Posted
I think standards and really listening to your gut about people is paramount in these places! One should feel excited every time you get a little message icon from someone but ALSO there is a LOTTA learning people need to do before even meeting. I think some people kinda take the first day of interaction as like “ok, this is who this person is always”. And a lot of the time, they are just not so dig dig and just take your time. EVERYWHERE is hard so this place or that is just the same as that place or this🤷🏻‍♂️🤷🏻‍♂️🤷🏻‍♂️🥰🥰🥰
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In my experience this app is mostly a place for exes you’ve blocked elsewhere to find you again lol. They’re coming out of the damn woodwork
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😅😅😅 hey! I do Woodburning so don’t give woodwork a bad name like that 🤨🤨😋😋😋🤪🤪🤪🤪
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I have made 1 amazing IRL connection and have hope that it will continue into something long term. I have plans to meet a new person in person this week for a vibe check date so, we'll see how that goes. However in the months that I've been on here most people don't vibe or they're not very active. Some have been very crude msgs from random guys but, overall this app is hit or miss.
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