Anonymous hotel meet

[AnonDaddy]

Hi, first ever post here so please be kind! 

I have met a girl online who stays completely anonymous (as do I). We cover our faces when video calling and love the idea that it can be anyone on the other end. We've talked about her getting a hotel room, letting me know the room number and blindfolding herself before I get there so we can fuck and she'd never see me. Has anyone tried this? Any hints or tips on how to be successful? She's very submissive and likes to please so feel free to suggest anything based on that. Thanks! 

[Superfreaky]

Yes, please be safe prop the door open before you completely enter check out the room and any closets and CHECK YOURSELF if the adjoining room door is locked. If all are good lock the door and proceed.

[ey****]

I've fantasised about similar - but - not to the extent of trying to make it happen.  There's a lot can go quite wrong.  Firstly, you both need a lot of trust that neither will peek and that also both of you are who you say you are.

there's a lot of excitement in not being able to verify this - but also a lot of risk; which would be embarassing to explain if it did go south.

[AnonDaddy]

Thanks for the tips. I'd definitely be nervous going up to the room, but I'm starting to trust her enough that it might happen. I'll keep you updated! 

[TxxxTom]

I did something like this except we both knew each other

[ca****]

17 hours ago, TxxxTom said:

I did something like this except we both knew each other

^ Interesting take on the situation ;)

[Deleted Member]

I like the idea.

dont see why its not safe with the amount of securtiy camera in this country it would be stupid to try anything?

good on you if you go through it....she love sthe excitemnt of a stranger fucking her thats all...if its a she ?

[ey****]

9 hours ago, FabSeverus said:

dont see why its not safe with the amount of securtiy camera in this country it would be stupid to try anything?

and yet crime still exists.

 

[Deleted Member]

Yes in some place by certain kind of criminals, not a woman who use a fetish website who’s got a registration details with her IP adress, who book and pay hotel room with a bank card in her name and will check in with the camera recording her face, leave her finger print all over the counter and on the magnetic card etc... and all for ? Killing or robbing the poor chap 

maybe it’s her last kink... 

 

[ey****]

safety isn't necessarily about being killed or robbed.

And safety is a two way thing.

Woman checks into a hotel in her own name.

Waits in room blindfolded for guy.

Guy walks in, bypasses front desk - goes in, knocks on the door blindfolded - goes in.

Both have a great time.

Scenario 1 :

Several weeks later, the lady returns online claiming she'd changed her mind and that he refused to stop and ***d her.  She cannot give any form of reasonable description - but of course, he is on CCTV - that's the best they got.  If she didn't report it straight away (and for many reasons, many don't) there'll be no evidence they even had sex and she'd not be able to give details of any identifying marks to prove otherwise.  There'd also be those who dismissed it as "wasn't that her fantasy" and a blaming mentality of "shouldn't be meeting strangers in hotel rooms"

The guy of course can now be identified via CCTV and whilst the law favours him (such is the world in which we live) it'd certainly put doubt in at least the minds of some, whether or not he had done anything wrong.

Scenario 2 :

Several weeks or months later, the guy logs onto his online bank or credit card statements and spots a load of things he didn't recognise.  She'd taken a copy of card details and been making online purchases - the cards would have enough details to pass most websites.   To report to the bank he now has to explain the embarrassment he met someone he didn't know for sex and that she'd taken a note of his details and made the odd purchase/payment here and there.  

Scenario 3 :

An agreement to wear a condom wasn't actually met - and now she is pregnant or one or both has a STD.

The list kinda goes on.

[Deleted Member]

eyemblacksheep if we start to extrapolate with "if scenario 1/2/3/ etc...well we may as weel stop doing bdsm all together cos it could happen to all of us....so lets stop the paranoia and lets enjoy ourselves

[ey****]

it's not really paranoia

it's risk management

we all *should* know that the majority of activities in BDSM carry a risk

I also appreciate that the risk is an attraction for some people (at least until something goes wrong)

so it's important to know what the risks are and how to mitigate them

there was a case hit the papers recently of knife play gone wrong where two people had just met and the guy accidentally killed the lady -and ultimately this was an unfortunate accident - but if you sit an unravel it, neither of them knew what they were doing and now one is dead and the other is in jail for manslaughter.

Had *either* of them clued up, then this probably wouldn't have happened.

Basically - it's not about paranoia, it's about having a fucking clue - it's about taking steps to get what you want whilst mitigating the risks.   Shit still happens. But you've gotta be able to look someone in the eyes and say either "I knew what I was getting myself in for", or "I took every precaution" 

if you do shibari you keep safety scissors to one side.

needle play, the needles are sterilised and you've a first aid kit at hand

flogging, you know where you can't hit

this is something everyone should strive to know or have enough trust in another person that they know they won't be let down. 

I get the excitement of risk taking - but let's be honest, no fucker is gonna be in your corner if your risk fails and they deem you didn't take due precaution 

[Deleted Member]

RACK - Risk Aware Consensual Kink.  

Being risk aware, as @eyemblacksheep says, is essential. You need to know them so you can mitigate them. BDSM activities are risky, no denying that, so all people involved need to know the risks and how to minimise them/what to do if things go wrong. 

The OP was asking for tips and advice, which are being given.  

Being Risk aware is essential, not paranoia. 

[Deleted Member]

On 10/28/2018 at 8:40 AM, VictoriaBlisse said:

RACK - Risk Aware Consensual Kink.  

Being risk aware, as @eyemblacksheep says, is essential. You need to know them so you can mitigate them. BDSM activities are risky, no denying that, so all people involved need to know the risks and how to minimise them/what to do if things go wrong. 

The OP was asking for tips and advice, which are being given.  

Being Risk aware is essential, not paranoia. 

I don't need you to remind me about RACK, I practice knives play, ropes, strangulation, breath play and my subs are still alived and happy and safe.

the op didnt get any tips or advice other than open the door wide, or scared him about doing his fantasy.

I read his post and what I thought was that they chat and skype numerous times,  and that he mentioned shes very submissive to the point of doing that fantasy. Its not like its on their first comms they decided to do it. So I assumed maybe wrongly they are was enought trust between them two. We didnt get any more details regarding how long they had comms between them before deciding that risky frisky kink.

So maybe here is the tips and advice.

Ask someone you can trust to wait for you at the hotel or near by. 

Do this kind of fantasy if both of you agree to leave their driving licence to a third party.

Agree to film the session and sign an agreement, then delete the video after a month.

 

Now for the sake of proving my point, you could assess all the risk you want, accidents still happen. You have your sub tied to a chair and suddenly the chair break and she land on her side cracking ribs or even the clavicule. Or lets say you had a sub for a year , done all sorts of kink, involving *** play, whipping etc, then one day after a year you have a knock at the door then you see the blue light outside. She accused you of *** and physical ***. 

Thats why I mention paranoia...

 

[Deleted Member]

Yes, accidents still happen, that is why it's Risk AWARE Consensual Kink and why talking about all the possible problems etc is helpful.  When you're doing something risky, there's always a chance of something going wrong. That's why you need to have thought that through in advance. 

[ey****]

when you cross a busy road; you use a crossing to reduce the risk.

You can still be hit on the crossing.  Someone nudged into me through red lights.  My brother ended up in hospital being hit when he was crossing using a traffic island.

So the risk doesn't go away, but you reduce the risk by using a crossing and waiting for the signal.

Of course, it may be you actually really know the road and know when it's safe to duck across - but if you were giving someone advice, you'd tell them to wait for the signal.  

But, we all still cross roads despite there being a risk.

Talking to someone online over a period of time does lessen risks - but - some of the biggest scams have been from people who've built up an online relationship over a period of time.  This doesn't disregard due precaution.

If the two would be blindfolded this would suggest that in the time chatting online they've never actually *seen* each other.  Never actually did any form of video chat.  So, it adds to the excitement but also the risk.

Certainly an easy way for both people to be able to call for help - and help can mean a number of things.  Also - practising things like putting on condoms blindfolded, to make sure they can be opened and placed on without splitting.   And both being able to go into the room with minimal belongings - because obviously if arriving/leaving blindfolded it might be missed if something is dropped from a pocket accidentally.  

And, at least a voicecall - both up front and on the day to say that she is in the room, it's ready/safe and any info he might need to navigate blindfolded