Bedroom only or inherent part of pur personalities?

[Deleted Member]

8 hours ago, MarriedCouple said:

As someone who identifies as a dominant, this is transcended through every aspect of life and always has been.

With my wife, she is very dominant in her career field and is dominant towards other females when we play. However, she has only allowed her submissive side to be exposed to me, which for her is a big part of trust and understanding we share, based on the bonds weve established with each other over the last decade.

You are couple goals. That sounds lovely

[ju****]

I like to be dominant outside of the bedroom to my babygirl can and will earn and receive punishments anywhere not just the bedroom

[ro****]

I’m very versatile in my submission, but mostly it’s an “in the bedroom” release, my partner must view me as an equal. My husband is not a typically masculine person, but definitely dominant in the bedroom. I think people are all different and what people derive pleasure from is very diverse, some require a very strict definition and others require fluidity. I’ve seen it all and been in many dynamics, and I think it can change with time, or life circumstances.

[Ch****]

So I'm not dominant in either place, but the submission I would like in the bedroom would be too much for me in regular life. There are aspects I'd like in both--feeling safe, understood, cherished, protected, and praised. But the physical submission would be unpleasant for me 24/7.

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, rogue_fae said:

I’m very versatile in my submission, but mostly it’s an “in the bedroom” release, my partner must view me as an equal. My husband is not a typically masculine person, but definitely dominant in the bedroom. I think people are all different and what people derive pleasure from is very diverse, some require a very strict definition and others require fluidity. I’ve seen it all and been in many dynamics, and I think it can change with time, or life circumstances.

Hi thanks for responding. I really like what you said in regards to diversity and fluidity. I think my sole take away from this thread is what someone wrote above about it all being subjective. Thanks for sharing 💖

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, Cherryblossomgirl said:

So I'm not dominant in either place, but the submission I would like in the bedroom would be too much for me in regular life. There are aspects I'd like in both--feeling safe, understood, cherished, protected, and praised. But the physical submission would be unpleasant for me 24/7.

Hi thanks for sharing with us 💖

[Deleted Member]

That's complicated, but yes and no. Being in control is nice, comfortable, familiar. I do it by default, I do it *very well,* and it is an inextricable part of who I am. Dominant in my social life and relationships, very much yes - unless my partner prefers I take the submissive role. And when I do, I love it. Generally, whether my partner is submissive/defferential or dominant/assertive, be it in the bedroom or other aspects of life, I end up in control one way or another. I have yet to see someone want to take that control from me, earn it, and keep it, but I imagine it may happen some day. That's my input on it. It depends, person to person.

[Ch****]

So if I am doing the D/s thing it's hard for me to keep it strictly bedroom. It can be done but I prefer lifestyle.

[Sa****]

I am dominant in the bedroom, and often throughout my relationship, but the question of whether that is intrinsic to my life, it is hard to put a solid yes or no on it. I feel like I have to say yes. But that is because the dominant side of me follows rules that I have had in place ever since I got into this lifestyle. I am very dominant, but dominance is never a given. It is to be earned, and consent is incredibly important. So, when someone gives me that power, I take it, but I also don't just assume dominance, until told otherwise, making it so most people in my life likely see me as mildly submissive and deferential. Taking charge is my initial instinct, but I also respect the act of submission too much to simply take that from someone. I think this might be more of an old school train of thought, but being a sadist, I deal with a lot of self-loathing, and this form of respect helps me to see the good and decent side of who and what I am. But maybe that's just me.

[Sc****]

For myself, bedroom only.

[Th****]

Mostly in the bedroom, but it is sexy to do some things in public!

[ma****]

I am opposite, dom irl and more sub in the bedroom. My wife is mostly sub in both. It's our opinion that it is a very individual basis.

[Fr****]

I have had to be dominant and assertive professionally, so the idea of being submissive to the right person in the bedroom or elsewhere is exciting.

[Ma****]

I do get the feeling someone who has an imposing dominant vibe both in and out the bed could be... A lil bit too much.

[Deleted Member]

23 hours ago, SadisticDaddy89 said:

I am dominant in the bedroom, and often throughout my relationship, but the question of whether that is intrinsic to my life, it is hard to put a solid yes or no on it. I feel like I have to say yes. But that is because the dominant side of me follows rules that I have had in place ever since I got into this lifestyle. I am very dominant, but dominance is never a given. It is to be earned, and consent is incredibly important. So, when someone gives me that power, I take it, but I also don't just assume dominance, until told otherwise, making it so most people in my life likely see me as mildly submissive and deferential. Taking charge is my initial instinct, but I also respect the act of submission too much to simply take that from someone. I think this might be more of an old school train of thought, but being a sadist, I deal with a lot of self-loathing, and this form of respect helps me to see the good and decent side of who and what I am. But maybe that's just me.

Thanks for sharing this. You sound like a good Dom. 

[pl****]

Me personally in my everyday life I’m more dominant. When it comes to a man… I’m weak. Like so weak not sure if growing up old school Baptist ways plays into that or not. But when I’m with a woman. I’ll dom her all day and no way will she be worthy to touch me. But a man. I’m weak all the way through not weak as in weak but weak as in will to show, prove, provide, nurture, care for. Idk. Now that I read this out out loud…. I’m now confused lol idk who I am other than Watika

[pl****]

I’m a boss at work, always financially supported the family. I can change my own oils, brakes and tie rod ends. When it comes to a man… all my senses go down the drain and I need but for me the need of him is empowering

[Ms****]

I'm not bedroom only...I can have sex with anyone at anytime. Domination is all encompassing for me.
Not one dimensional...

[Deleted Member]

22 hours ago, pleasurenewbie said:

I’m a boss at work, always financially supported the family. I can change my own oils, brakes and tie rod ends. When it comes to a man… all my senses go down the drain and I need but for me the need of him is empowering

I like being the boss, but I swear to god when I need something from the top cupboard or the light bulb changing at the top of my landing due to being demi in stature...I so need a man in my life.

[Deleted Member]

I'm a sub in the bedroom because I have too many responsibilities out of it. I work full time, run a house and car and I need to be able to give up control somewhere

[Deleted Member]

10 hours ago, BomshellBettie said:

I like being the boss, but I swear to god when I need something from the top cupboard or the light bulb changing at the top of my landing due to being demi in stature...I so need a man in my life.

You simply need a man you can direct, when he's not already anticipating your needs.

[ul****]

Bedroom fun is my favourite

[Deleted Member]

It's part of my personality.  I started as a submissive, because I was taught that that's how women should be.

But I hated every second of it. 

Thankfully, I learned that I'm much better being the one in control.

[Deleted Member]

Freak in the sheets, queen in the streets 👸

[pl****]

I’m dominant when it comes to providing & protection to work, life, family & home only bc I’ve been single so long but I was born a fighter, survivor and it’s that desire to find my home..(papa/sir) In the bedroom I’m naturally sub sometimes I get this cocky itch and I’ll sit naked on a man’s back while he is naked on all fours (plug sometimes) with the leash in my hand and even through alllllllll that by the end he must rise up and take his dominantacy back, we can play and I most definitely can dish out but it’s important for me that by the end of the session I’m weeping in his arm pit. 🤷‍♀️. This is just me