What's your number?

[La****]

Apropos of a conversation about safety.

What's in a number? Its no big deal.
If you don't like me, you can just block,
right? The gaslighting starts right there.
Because what you're really saying,
in that innocuous little question is:
You're over reacting. Hysterical female.
Drama queen. Don't you trust me? No.
Of course I don't. I don't know you.
If i don't trust you to bind me, or blind me,
then I don't trust you enough to give you access
to me. To my life. My privacy. The block?
What bullshit. When you have my number,
you have my number. And I can block yours,
but I can't block your work phone. Your
friend's phone. The phone in the bar
where you know the barman and it's cool,
man. There are a million ways you could call,
am i supposed to block them all? I can't.
Don't give me your number, because
There is a question there, too. An expectation.
Tit for tat. My 393 for your 707. Subtle
pressure. Quiet manipulation. You don't mean
anything by it? You're a nice guy? Trust you?
Trust me. We've heard that all before.

[60****]

Damn seems like u been through a sticky situation

[WaterDude]

Some dude never learn! This whole game is about trust! Trust each other, and you will get more respect. Act a douche, and you will be rejected. Be a gentleman, and I mean, gentle...man! Even the toughest Dom knows when to be the person their sub needs. Trust, be good little humans.

[Sm****]

It's to a point where I rarely give my number out to anybody anymore just because of how unscrupulous people are nowadays. 🫤

[Sm****]

And I definitely do not give my number out to anybody I can't first video chat with at least a couple of times on the app.

[Gi****]

Make a fake number and use that app to make phone calls and video calls, please. With your phone number I can pull public information down to your address and square footage of your home! Email addresses you have used, relatives, and people suggested to be acquainted with you.

[Sm****]

I use a Google Voice number.

[Aphorisms]

That is an interesting debate... To give your phone number out or not to... As some of the people above have said get a voice app like Google voice and etc or use the app here... I have encountered plenty of fake people on this app.... When this lifestyle is about freedom and acceptance of all situations. Being in this lifestyle for 30 years ive seen a lot of changes throughout the years....  There is no way anyone should attempt to build a relationship whether it be D/s  or whatever through text messaging.. That is a complete red flag for me...With it being 2025 you have video and voice chat through an array of applications to further your relationship with whom you consider... 

[Gi****]

Yes! Once a report is built ... which should be the goal.

[Gi****]

Do you guys remember those "fake numbers" you could give out moons ago and if the person called they would be calling into "the rejection hotline" 🤔

[Sm****]

Gigglez, are you a PI or am I that out of touch with the free flow of info on the interwebs? 😂

[Aphorisms]

lmfaoooooooooooo yep i remember those fake numbers back in the day....  i use google voice for a lot of things...  and they allow  you to have multiple numbers 

 

[Sm****]

2 minutes ago, GigglezMe said:

Do you guys remember those "fake numbers" you could give out moons ago and if the person called they would be calling into "the rejection hotline" 🤔

I remember hearing about them, but never got to experience one first hand.😏

[DJWolfDen]

I totally get and agree with the personal safety and it should always be your choice whether to give out a phone number or not.
I think the one thing for me is getting to know a submissive that's at least close by to me who I want to invest my time in eventually I would want us to be able to meet up face to face and then exchange phone numbers that's just an idea. Of course I have expense extensive time getting to know a person to where we both have enough trust in each other to give each other our phone numbers to continue discussions but that's just me.

[La****]

21 minutes ago, DJWolfDen said:

I totally get and agree with the personal safety and it should always be your choice whether to give out a phone number or not.
I think the one thing for me is getting to know a submissive that's at least close by to me who I want to invest my time in eventually I would want us to be able to meet up face to face and then exchange phone numbers that's just an idea. Of course I have expense extensive time getting to know a person to where we both have enough trust in each other to give each other our phone numbers to continue discussions but that's just me.

This really is my key point. Of course that's the aim, but there is a constant expectation that numbers will be exchanged very quickly. I prefer to get to know someone before exchanging my phone number, and I have received a lot of push back and criticism for that.

[Ch****]

Good for thought for the day .

[Aphorisms]

Lady_Char that is exactly why i said this is an interesting debate...  The reason why is if you were born from the early 80s on down, getting to know someone was over the phone as there wasnt text messaging then. Because i come from that generation myself i believe you cant actually get to know someone through text.. The reason why i express this is there is no expression at all through font... Im sure all of us has typed something in text and the person on that other side of that text has taken offense, but had they heard your voice actually say the same exact words that you had typed it wouldnt have been offensive at all. Through voice you can hear if someone is offended by what you say and correct it. You can truly hear if someone is happy or sad or discouraged or etc.... This is all interesting to me and i enjoy seeing everyone's input on it... My personal preference will always be getting to know someone over the phone and then figure out if i want to proceed to actually meet them or whatever... 

[La****]

2 minutes ago, Aphorisms said:

Lady_Char that is exactly why i said this is an interesting debate...  The reason why is if you were born from the early 80s on down, getting to know someone was over the phone as there wasnt text messaging then. Because i come from that generation myself i believe you cant actually get to know someone through text.. The reason why i express this is there is no expression at all through font... Im sure all of us has typed something in text and the person on that other side of that text has taken offense, but had they heard your voice actually say the same exact words that you had typed it wouldnt have been offensive at all. Through voice you can hear if someone is offended by what you say and correct it. You can truly hear if someone is happy or sad or discouraged or etc.... This is all interesting to me and i enjoy seeing everyone's input on it... My personal preference will always be getting to know someone over the phone and then figure out if i want to proceed to actually meet them or whatever... 

Apps have the ability to video call and voice note. There really is no reason to have a phone number, and it is much more *** than voice or video chatting on this app, or even WhatsApp.

[DJWolfDen]

Yeah there are voice apps to use and I have discovered that you can send voice messages here on this app

[Aphorisms]

Lady_Char now that i agree with... if any application has voice and video chat in it then at that time there isn't a need for exchange of phone numbers immediately... .  

 

[Du****]

“I’m thinking about deleting this app, my number’s 077—— if you want to keep chatting” - nope, I didn’t ask for your number and I won’t be using it. Don’t press it on me without permission. I’ll chat with you here, on this moderated platform where it’s safer, or I won’t chat with you at all.

[Th****]

I learned the hard way that you can block numbers but they still go to your voicemail. Blocking numbers don't fully block them unless you contact your service provider. The only way you can fully block a number is by using one of those apps like Google Voice 

 

[Sa****]

Who knew raging to you about this topic while walking around Target would spark this marvelous piece! You are the only person on here that I wholeheartedly trust and I’m thankful you are my best friend.❤️

We have an underlying *** of what if. What if they spend $2.99 on a number search and discover everything about me. What if they show up at my home or work. What if they follow me around. What if they blackmail me. What if they have nothing to lose.
Trust is earned and should not be easily given away like a series of numbers.

[Th****]

Factual also not correct. Yes you can block numbers but if someone calls anonymous that’s that.

For me it’s a red flag if someone can’t accept that my number is only available after we had an in person vibe check.

The vibe check is after we have chatted, voiced and / or video called .

It does not matter if someone likes that or not . If there’s no patience we are not proceeding as you can’t seem to accept boundaries and / or have empathy .

And . It’s all fun and dandy until you say it’s not working and you want to stop communicating. Had someone this week who started calling me at random times and when I said it’s not working all the best, he texted me on ALL THE APPS.

Go figure . It’s just a number .

[Deleted Member]

I don’t give out my number bc your number is attached to everything. So if they wanna move off app get a texting app. Stay safe and trust your gut