Weightloss and "The Lifestyle"

[Sc****]

I would like to hear some experiences of folks who entered into (honestly any, vanilla included) a relationship in the midst of a weightloss journey. I am concerned about my current appearance changing with time and whether others have had similar concerns or experiences around that context. I'm not ignorant to the many nuances of society's view on weightloss, and appreciate all outlooks

[AKA_Copper]

I would be sceptical of anyone in my life who wasn't supportive of any goals I had set myself be that in relation to my appearance, education or anything else I wanted to achieve that I'd (emphasis on I'd) determined was to better myself. I'd certainly be considering whether they had a place in my life if they weren't supportive.

[DarkArts1066]

Well said Copper. As always.

If I were in a relationship - with anyone, and also on a weight loss journey (I’m
male, 60 and retired…. I am CONSTANTLY on a weight loss journey, who am I kidding.)
I’m pretty certain that my partner would be aware of my goals.
I would hope, dare I say - expect them to be supportive of my intentions, however practically successful I am.

You -as the OP, seem to be honest and open about your journey -which is good, and in my view the right way to approach it.
You don’t mention whether you do have a partner, or whether this is a more generalistic viewpoint, but I would agree with CopperKnob above, in that I would expect the people around me to be supportive of my journey.

Be safe, and be happy, and good luck 👍🏼

[ra****]

What is "society's view on weight loss"? I'd love to know. Seems like you're throwing negative shade on it. Listen, lose weight if you need to. Being healthy is like number one on the list of living... Orrr, be fat if you want to get fatter if you want to it's your life but one thing is for sure stop caring what other people think and if other people do not agree with what you are doing then leave them alone quit being so timid and worrisome

[Deleted Member]

I'm a recent gym rat convert. I'm already going to the gym for around one and a half hours every four days. I'm considering adding a yoga class that would bump it up to going 5 days every week.

If any man doesn't support me then he is kicked to the curb.

Though I'm more into gaining muscle than losing weight.

[Ha****]

I read this and I thought, “okay, they are a fellow fatty worried that without the weight they wouldn’t be as insert a description”… because that’s really what it. Without the weight, will you still be yourself? With that self be desirable? As funny? As whatever adjective you hold close as a Fat person… because for so many with weight, our personalities are tied to our size. This is something you have to figure out how to deal with, relationship or not; because without the extra pounds there’s no where to hide. I lost relationships at every size but realized it wasn’t my weight that was the cause, it was me. My outlook changed. My confidence grew; I was always confident but with a curvier body—unstoppable! My attitude those in my life made it hard for those who treated me badly. It’s easy for folks to blame the weight but honestly it’s harder to blame the fact that the person in the weight loss journey is now ready to hold all parts of their lives accountable and at a higher standard. Weight loss folks are amazing! We are determined to change our bodies—no time for extra pounds or BS!

[Ha****]

44 minutes ago, TheMacabreBrat said:

I'm a recent gym rat convert. I'm already going to the gym for around one and a half hours every four days. I'm considering adding a yoga class that would bump it up to going 5 days every week.

If any man doesn't support me then he is kicked to the curb.

Though I'm more into gaining muscle than losing weight.

Commenting only to say yes to the yoga! I’m starting my yoga routine back up and forgot how much I loved it. Happy to give suggestions on how to make it body friendly if you do end up taking the class

[Sc****]

1 hour ago, detkmd36 said:

What is "society's view on weight loss"? I'd love to know. Seems like you're throwing negative shade on it. Listen, lose weight if you need to. Being healthy is like number one on the list of living... Orrr, be fat if you want to get fatter if you want to it's your life but one thing is for sure stop caring what other people think and if other people do not agree with what you are doing then leave them alone quit being so timid and worrisome

To be clear, I meant that as "you're safe to say letting yourself rot is bad"

[di****]

I have.
Lost a 165 pounds for me. The journey is amazing. The amount of self-confidence. After losing the weight, it makes you want to do different things with your partner and outside with your partnbring.Ing other people into the bedroom for fun because I had extra skin removed on my stomach aka my hood lol mean able to go on top without the extra skin hitting the other person

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, HappyFatLady said:

Commenting only to say yes to the yoga! I’m starting my yoga routine back up and forgot how much I loved it. Happy to give suggestions on how to make it body friendly if you do end up taking the class

Thank you. That would be amazing. I have never done yoga officially but have always thought that it equally looks cool and I would never be able to do that 😅

[Ma****]

Sadly my weight loss has done nothing for my self esteem. I still have that mentality. I hope the best for you.

[Ha****]

22 minutes ago, TheMacabreBrat said:

Thank you. That would be amazing. I have never done yoga officially but have always thought that it equally looks cool and I would never be able to do that 😅

Ohh yeah, it never looks cool 😂 but your body will feel more flexible!

[pa****]

Im currently taking Mounjaro and have lost 4.5 stone (30kg) since november. Ive not posted any pics because its not making any difference to people wanting to chat or meet me. You are doing this journey for you and your health, dont worry what others think. If they are nice people they shouldnt care but actually be supportive. But most on here only go on looks, and they are not worth worrying about.

[pa****]

2 hours ago, dieppe41080 said:

I have.
Lost a 165 pounds for me. The journey is amazing. The amount of self-confidence. After losing the weight, it makes you want to do different things with your partner and outside with your partnbring.Ing other people into the bedroom for fun because I had extra skin removed on my stomach aka my hood lol mean able to go on top without the extra skin hitting the other person

Fantastic and well done.

[re****]

I love seeing a goal reached and giving rewards. Working out together Is amazing

[Johnathan-9864]

I just want to congratulate all the people who wanted to lose weight and have done so. I have never been fat, but I love to see people try to get healthier and take care of themselves. No shade on people who are fat, my mom was 4'11" and weighed over 300lbs when I was growing up. Seeing her struggle to get to a weight she wanted was hard. She would try something, then give up after a month or so. Since I've become an adult, she is down to about 120 or so. And she says it's the best she has ever felt in her life. She has all the saggy skin, but if you're already with someone, or you find someone after the weight loss, it doesn't matter. They are invested in you, not what you look like. Looks don't last, they never do.

[Da****]

Right now I'm in a kinda different scenario I've been with my daddy 5 yrs I lost 60lbs after meeting him but as of the past year I gained the exact weight back and it's so disappointing 😞 he says he's going to try and help me and support me through my weight loss journey even though he loves me at any weight he knows how bad it makes me feel mentally and physically

[Ki****]

I recently concluded a 120 lbs weight loss journey. The thing that really motivated me was the liberation of my own body. I'm able to do things with my subs that I only dreamed of before. I understand the *** of your partner changing their perception with your appearance.. but you have to lose weight for you not for them. Fill your own glass before filling the glasses of those around you for when your glass is full you have more to give.

[Deleted Member]

7 hours ago, Johnathan-9864 said:

I just want to congratulate all the people who wanted to lose weight and have done so. I have never been fat, but I love to see people try to get healthier and take care of themselves. No shade on people who are fat, my mom was 4'11" and weighed over 300lbs when I was growing up. Seeing her struggle to get to a weight she wanted was hard. She would try something, then give up after a month or so. Since I've become an adult, she is down to about 120 or so. And she says it's the best she has ever felt in her life. She has all the saggy skin, but if you're already with someone, or you find someone after the weight loss, it doesn't matter. They are invested in you, not what you look like. Looks don't last, they never do.

I am probably the odd one out, but I also don't see myself as fat. Yes I don't like my arms and my tummy could be flatter. But I don't want to change too much about my body. I have never been told that I'm too fat (outside of doctors 🙄). Guys have always called me very sexual names, followed me around, and never leave me alone. Hell I wish that I could do something to make myself Invisible 

[ch****]

Only chase after baddies and you won't have to worry if you're just getting better and better looking

[Deleted Member]

I joined this app in the process of a journey and I have not talked to anyone who hasn’t been supportive. Anyone who doesn’t have your best interest in mind, isn’t someone who you want talk with anyway.
Good luck on your journey and don’t forget to stop and smell the flowers along the way.

[di****]

Friday at 01:51 PM, pauld999 said:

Fantastic and well done.

Thanks

[pr****]

I've run into the same issue. I've lost 120lbs over the last 3 years and there are definitely men who have matched with me expecting me to always be plus sized and are disappointed to find out I'm losing weight. "You better not lose those curves" I feel very fetishized when they say things like that.

[An****]

When I first started dating my ex wife, I was 300 pounds. I then lost 120, but the fact that I was so obese when we started the relationship gave me a good sense of security about my weight in that relationship

[dr****]

I’m trying to date and lose weight at the same time, but not having much luck