While I doubt I'll be as poetic as PleasantlySatified was, I'll try to give my take on it. I have boundaries that I en*** on myself , and I'm very strict with my boundaries. I tend to get attached to people, because I always think people are like me. I tend to get surprised when that never turns Read more… out to be the case. So, to protect myself, I keep certain aspects of the BDSM lifestyle to only the women I am with. There are some things that will be solely for a relationship, while other things I can do with anyone.
Light bandage, ***, and being slightly rough (choking, spanking with hand, that kinda thing.) I can do with anyone.
If we're going to go really hard, or use a blindfold, spitting, fisting, using toys, whips or canes, extreme bondage, all of those things I will have to be in a relationship with. Because those are the things that build such a strong connection, that it is something special and should only be shared with someone special.

I've been in relationships where I've cheated, and the chick was okay with it, but I wasn't after and broke up with her. I've also been on the other side of being cheated on. I guess if you aren't married, it's better, but while married that's a huge no for me. The only time it becomes okay, is if Read more… both partners are aware that cheating could happen, and are okay with it. Otherwise that's not really a kink, it's no self control.

Communication. Being able to tell someone the good and the bad and have a real conversation about those things. Not run away if something isn't working or not up to a standard, but explaining what the problem is, so it could be worked on. It's strange to think that this has become rare.
Respect Read more… for each other, and each other's boundaries.
Taking the time to say thank you for something that was done, not in a Dom/sub way, but in a decent human way.

I just want to congratulate all the people who wanted to lose weight and have done so. I have never been fat, but I love to see people try to get healthier and take care of themselves. No shade on people who are fat, my mom was 4'11" and weighed over 300lbs when I was growing up. Seeing her Read more… struggle to get to a weight she wanted was hard. She would try something, then give up after a month or so. Since I've become an adult, she is down to about 120 or so. And she says it's the best she has ever felt in her life. She has all the saggy skin, but if you're already with someone, or you find someone after the weight loss, it doesn't matter. They are invested in you, not what you look like. Looks don't last, they never do.

For me, it is a bonding experience and a trust building thing. If I'm going to get kinky with someone they need to trust that I won't hurt them to an extreme extent, and will comply with the safe word. On the other hand, I need to trust they wouldn't let me push them to a point where it's going to Read more… change them for the worse.