Intimate Doms

[Deleted Member]

Some men call themselves Dom to gain access to women. They don't want connection, they just want sex. Equally I don't see why every authentic Dom would be offering love - not everyone is seeking that.

[Ka****]

The way I see it Intimacy can be worked into any dynamic, it’s about how the dom/sub work it to their routine. I understand how some will not implement it, and that is a choice. Some Dynamics need to grow just like any other relationship.

[Deleted Member]

yes i get you!! i have a hard time finding a proper dom as well

[Nddd]

Its all about the build up process. A lot of doms just want to wreck somebody but don’t want to build up to that moment. Your statement about confusing dom with slave master kinda sums it up already.
Sounds like you just didnt find the right one yet…

[ki****]

I feel like a lot of it comes down to what many are like anyway right now. Quick in, fast build, casual, and bounce. I have experienced this quite a bit as well. They seek a fast jump in, and hand me your submission, but aren't willing to build trust, take time to get to know someone, and it's many who self focus most. I want to better self in the process as well, so I'm not rushing and can't be bullied into it, which I have had a couple experiences with "Doms," doing. Quotes because they made clear they used the term without the understanding of being one. If casual is all one seeks, or a quick submission, more power to them and I wish them the best. It's just not for me, and I'm not the fit.

[Bu****]

Yes! Lots of times when I reach out to people, it either turns out to be a scam, or they’re looking to get paid for something. I just want a dominant partner, who’s able to take care of me, is that too much to ask😅?

[Po****]

Dom is a role that's attractive to people that don't understand kink and are insecure in their masculinity, so you can often run into these people. Don't bother with them, it's going to be a bad time

[Deleted Member]

Experienced Daddy Dom / Pleasure Dom here.

For every actual Dom there are 99 wannabes. Hold out for a Dom that respects you first and more importantly respects the value of the gift of your submission. If they don’t treasure that and protect it with their life they will never respect you.

[bi****]

I used to be classified as an intimate sub until someone broke me. I healed myself and I naturally switched to Domanency. I am not a typical "dom" either. Alot of doms take the Intimate subs for granted.

[Deleted Member]

Just to find any female dom whos not scared of a wheelchair user would be a start. Far to many people dismiss and underestimate our ability to serve. If you can be a little creative we can be very attentive. I think i have more chance of winning the lottery than finding a true intimate dom and i dont play it 🤣 but thats just my experience.

[Lo****]

The build up to intimacy is often the most erotic part of intimacy and anyone who doesn't want to take the time to build the bond of trust needed for real physical surrender and intimacy is not worth anyone's time.

I think it's also very important for a submissive to remember they actually control a D/s relationship through boundaries, limits and consent.

A Dom only assumes the illusion of control.

[La****]

1 hour ago, med1974 said:

Well read it and first a pic would be nice but as I read your privilege it's not all the doms fault it's alksi what you say but yes most 9f theses so called does are fake

Personally, I don’t post pics because I’m attractive and ppl will waste my time an never get to know me. I’d rather they read thru my bio and then reach out. The main problem besides ppl using the term “Dom” to be an inconsiderate ass is there aren’t many BBC. I’ve met a few passionate Doms they just aren’t my type🙃

[La****]

1 hour ago, KandBs006 said:

Wow. I’m seeing a lot of unhappy subs. This hurts my heart.

Many compassionate Doms are older white men. Unfortunately I’m a young blk woman an I like young blk men an there are few tht calls themselves Doms an even less that actually are. I’ve been talkin to subs responding and it’s just a lot of power hungry men in general.

[La****]

1 hour ago, Unikyro said:

Depends on the type of Dom
Soft Dom
Hard Dom
primal Dom etc

For some the intimacy is less necessary
And for others it's a priority

Sadly there are often less softdoms compared to harddoms


Lack of aftercare is a massive red flag to me though tbh, decompression and discussion are a must

Tht isnt the problem I can understand if we tlk for a sec n your interest ain’t aligning. I’ll move on but I’m tired of random spicy pics and “when you gon let me fold you into a pretzel” an they ain’t seen my face. You can be hard or soft but get to know who you fucking pls. I feel like a deer in headlights not a doe. I’m scared 😭😭

[Ka****]

10 minutes ago, Lavish-Ly said:

Many compassionate Doms are older white men. Unfortunately I’m a young blk woman an I like young blk men an there are few tht calls themselves Doms an even less that actually are. I’ve been talkin to subs responding and it’s just a lot of power hungry men in general.

Maybe it’s time for a change of requirements.

[La****]

59 minutes ago, kittygotclaws said:

I feel like a lot of it comes down to what many are like anyway right now. Quick in, fast build, casual, and bounce. I have experienced this quite a bit as well. They seek a fast jump in, and hand me your submission, but aren't willing to build trust, take time to get to know someone, and it's many who self focus most. I want to better self in the process as well, so I'm not rushing and can't be bullied into it, which I have had a couple experiences with "Doms," doing. Quotes because they made clear they used the term without the understanding of being one. If casual is all one seeks, or a quick submission, more power to them and I wish them the best. It's just not for me, and I'm not the fit.

THISSSSS. I never get passed the first day cuz it’s always fast-paced day one A then falls of immediately. Like plz just say y’all controlling men tht want a one night cuz after I express it’ll take time before our first meet it’s crickets after they’ve complemented me and blown smoke up my ass for the last 3hrs

[Lo****]

All I can say is that the person you're looking for is out there.
Find them and don't settle or sell yourself short in the meantime.

[La****]

Thank all the DOMs for giving there piece, I appreciate the outlook. Hard or soft your subs appreciate you and your dedication to them. Keep being you💙

[fl****]

Just my 2 cents, but it sounds like you need the right kind of Dom. As a pleasure Dom, I love giving a partner affection and intimacy while maintaining the firm hand. For pleasure Dom’s, it’s all about giving what a partner needs and craves, including intimacy and affection.

[ki****]

1 hour ago, Lavish-Ly said:

THISSSSS. I never get passed the first day cuz it’s always fast-paced day one A then falls of immediately. Like plz just say y’all controlling men tht want a one night cuz after I express it’ll take time before our first meet it’s crickets after they’ve complemented me and blown smoke up my ass for the last 3hrs

That exactly, haha. "Oh my god you're so perfect." Until they need patience longer than a few days. Suddenly the insults come, and we're a horrible person. Makes me grateful for the decent people, but it's never fun to deal with the bad.

[de****]

It sounds like you you’re looking for a true pleasure dom!

[Deleted Member]

I can’t really specify the type of dom I am but I can say I gotta be able to cuddle ya and stuff after having some rough sex 😅

[Deleted Member]

Yes i do have a hard time to

[ta****]

Not just you! A friend of mine, and I, have finally recognized what we’re looking for and what we’ve experienced are two different things. After over a year, we’re bowing out.

[Submissive_summer]

Just because someone embodies dominance doesn’t mean they embody the kind of dominance that aligns with your needs.....

And Just because someone identifies as a submissive doesn’t mean their style of submission will align with others dominance....

The way you are using quotes around “Doms” kind of implies that those people aren’t actually Dominants...... but maybe they are... just not the kind of Doms that fit your needs...

There are so many different types of D/s dynamics out there...
Thats the beauty of this lifestyle... it’s meant to be built around the people involved.... bespoke to the dynamic partners...

For me.... it’s about connection...not just control..

You can absolutely have a Dom who is caring.... intimate....emotionally attuned and still confident and in control.....

The challenge is finding someone who aligns with your needs.....

Hold out for the connection you want...... It’s out there.... even if it takes a little time to find.... Best of Luck