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Busy Means Busy - Right?


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Yesterday at 07:49 AM, thePapaPanthers said:

If this was a 30 minute later response, the question really became could your daughter have waited after all you did make an appointment to be with the sub. And flip-flopping can definitely frustrate somebody. Especially somebody you've just met. In one respect I understand fully family first but it depends on what the situation is. If Daddy I got a hangnail and I need you clip it for me that can wait. But Daddy my car broke down and I'm in the middle of nowhere can you come get me, that's a little bit more important. But then that should have been explained and then you should have just said can we meet an hour later. It really comes down to what the situation is and how to handle it. I'm with you on family first, but I also understand other people had expectations set by you to be fulfilled.

Exactly this is what vetting is. If someone is flaky from the beginning… it’s a non starter for a lot of people. I’m a parent to and my kid comes first for me, but if I have made a commitment to another person that is also valid. That’s also something I would like to teach my child, commitments matter. If she was absolutely mentally hysterical or ill and needed me those commitments would be dropped. If she is just not feeling mom tonight I would probably say, “I do have plans tonight, is this an emergency?” It doesn’t mean my family doesn’t come first it means that I want to respect the time I have commited to another person. That’s a balance and whether you are in an LTR or FWB if you are spending time with someone then they also deserve to feel that their time is valued, especially if power is exchanged. If someone said “oh I can see you” then 30 minutes later they cancelled on out second time meeting up it would red flags. This person is vetting you and you are vetting them. It’s seeing if you can trust each other with intimacy of BDSM, that’s a pretty big deal.

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