Wife submitting to me

[DomAldo]

Hi all, 

 

Well tonight my wife has decided I can take full control over her body and do whatever I want, tie her, gag her spank her use every hole, she has given me a safe word if she has had her enough but, she really wants to me test her tolerances for *** and domination, 

 

I am looking for some ideas and suggestions of things we can do, I have just bought some nipple and clit clamps that she doesn't know about yet and we have a selection or other rolls equipment, but I've never been given free reigh to do as I please so would appreciate any guidance anyone could offer me. 

 

Thanks

[UK****]

Well it's your night, what would you like to do? She's not asking what we want she's giving you the control

[DomAldo]

1 minute ago, UK_Knight said:

Well it's your night, what would you like to do? She's not asking what we want she's giving you the control

Oh I know what I'm going to do I'm just looking for some ideas from more experienced players, hopfully might find a nice surprise for her from any suggestions, no harm in trying to expand my knowledge 

[Deleted Member]

My only advice would be to keep it within her limits and don't take her beyond half of what she can take. If your lucky - She may come back for more. If you push too hard she may safeword and never let you do it again. Respect her boundaries, negotiate first and remember your aftercare! All's fair in consensual kink but she needs to know she can trust you. Once you have that - you'll have her forever and not just the night.

[DomAldo]

16 minutes ago, KinkySirXxX said:

My only advice would be to keep it within her limits and don't take her beyond half of what she can take. If your lucky - She may come back for more. If you push too hard she may safeword and never let you do it again. Respect her boundaries, negotiate first and remember your aftercare! All's fair in consensual kink but she needs to know she can trust you. Once you have that - you'll have her forever and not just the night.

Thank you for the advice we have spoken in depth about this and we have been together for quite a long time I believe she has total trust in me or she won't not let me do this, also I'm confident of knowing her limits, though she has told me to push her limits, which I won't do to far unless she appears to be enjoying it(I'm not naturally dominant I like playing oth sides as does she) , she has a safe word for when she wants to finish so if she uses it we will discuss after about what she liked and what she didn't, we are just beginning to explore more suxail interactions between us so anything we can take from the advice or from me taking control tonight will only make us stronger and help us adapt our sex life to how we want it to be

[Deleted Member]

51 minutes ago, DomAldo said:

Thank you for the advice we have spoken in depth about this and we have been together for quite a long time I believe she has total trust in me or she won't not let me do this, also I'm confident of knowing her limits, though she has told me to push her limits, which I won't do to far unless she appears to be enjoying it(I'm not naturally dominant I like playing oth sides as does she) , she has a safe word for when she wants to finish so if she uses it we will discuss after about what she liked and what she didn't, we are just beginning to explore more suxail interactions between us so anything we can take from the advice or from me taking control tonight will only make us stronger and help us adapt our sex life to how we want it to be

That's a great answer! It sounds like your doing the right things in that case. Really glad you've put the time in before hand to get it right for both of you. You had me worried there for a moment.

Here's a good plan if your a little unsure about what your doing or it comes less natural to you:

If your playing out a scene then discuss the nuts and bolts of it beforehand... like literally face to face before you get down to business! "Tonight I'm going to do this, then this, and this and if your a very good girl i'll even do that other thing you love. Do you understand?"

Remind her of her limits! Trust me, nothing says 'I can trust you' like you saying her limits out loud and take the time now to clarify them if needed. Nothing kills a scene quicker than crossing a boundary and respecting them will help you feel closer and the boundaries to grow.

Rate your play. Choose just a few things you'd like to do (3 or 4 at most!) and rate their intensity. Especially *** play. Start with the low numbers and put the high intensity stuff at the end. Ease in slow, use sensual play to start. Take your time, building suspense, keeping things at a middle intensity as lonh as you both can bare it and then something a little more Intense at the end will be a great ride for both of you.

DONT GO OVER 8/10! Lol trust me. 😏

Good luck and keep us posted with how it went.

[Mz****]

33 minutes ago, DomAldo said:

she has a safe word for when she wants to finish so if she uses it we will discuss after about what she liked and what she didn't, we are just beginning to explore more suxail interactions between us so anything we can take from the advice or from me taking control tonight will only make us stronger and help us adapt our sex life to how we want it to be

I appreciate you say she has a safe word, but if this is her first experience of D/s and she wishes to be pushed, particularly trying new things, you both may find the traffic light system works better than a one word stop.

For the benefit of any reading this who may be unaware of the traffic light system.

Red

Saying this will mean you want your play partner to stop immediately. It should be used when you're not comfortable, things are too much, or you no longer consent.

Amber or yellow

Slow down. Maybe you liked what they were doing but then it became a little too intense, ***ful, whatever, perhaps you're reaching your limit, or are edging close to physical discomfort..(a hold or restraint position, strain on joints etc)

Green 

Go for it. Use green if you like what your partner's doing, you feel totally comfortable, and you want them to continue.

This will help you monitor her comfort levels with both what you're doing and how it feels, also very useful for that talk afterwards you mentioned.

[Deleted Member]

20 minutes ago, MzJax said:

I appreciate you say she has a safe word, but if this is her first experience of D/s and she wishes to be pushed, particularly trying new things, you both may find the traffic light system works better than a one word stop.

For the benefit of any reading this who may be unaware of the traffic light system.

Red

Saying this will mean you want your play partner to stop immediately. It should be used when you're not comfortable, things are too much, or you no longer consent.

Amber or yellow

Slow down. Maybe you liked what they were doing but then it became a little too intense, ***ful, whatever, perhaps you're reaching your limit, or are edging close to physical discomfort..(a hold or restraint position, strain on joints etc)

Green 

Go for it. Use green if you like what your partner's doing, you feel totally comfortable, and you want them to continue.

This will help you monitor her comfort levels with both what you're doing and how it feels, also very useful for that talk afterwards you mentioned.

That's a great suggestion MzJax!

[DomAldo]

30 minutes ago, KinkySirXxX said:

That's a great suggestion MzJax!

Yea it we are definitely going to try using this, as I'm comfortable with having some *** inflicted on me but there's always a level that a tad too much.. 

 

Thank you guys appreciate the simple but helpful feedback 

[17****]

Though keeping the clamps a surprise is a fun idea, for the other ideas you intend to apply I recommend discussing before hand. Make sure that both of you are on the same level about the Risk Aware Consensual Kink concerns.
Once you have the safety protocols in place... enjoy.

[Urassismine]

2 hours ago, MzJax said:

I appreciate you say she has a safe word, but if this is her first experience of D/s and she wishes to be pushed, particularly trying new things, you both may find the traffic light system works better than a one word stop.

For the benefit of any reading this who may be unaware of the traffic light system.

Red

Saying this will mean you want your play partner to stop immediately. It should be used when you're not comfortable, things are too much, or you no longer consent.

Amber or yellow

Slow down. Maybe you liked what they were doing but then it became a little too intense, ***ful, whatever, perhaps you're reaching your limit, or are edging close to physical discomfort..(a hold or restraint position, strain on joints etc)

Green 

Go for it. Use green if you like what your partner's doing, you feel totally comfortable, and you want them to continue.

This will help you monitor her comfort levels with both what you're doing and how it feels, also very useful for that talk afterwards you mentioned.

We use this system and it works well. We actually have a blue, as well. A step above greeen. Not only do I like what you are doing and am totally comfortable with it, I love it, and I’d like you to slowly ratchet up the intensity until a announce a different color.

[UK****]

How did it go?

[Deleted Member]

Yeah we're all waiting to hear how it went... debrief please!🤤

[Deleted Member]

15 hours ago, Urassismine said:

We use this system and it works well. We actually have a blue, as well. A step above greeen. Not only do I like what you are doing and am totally comfortable with it, I love it, and I’d like you to slowly ratchet up the intensity until a announce a different color.

I have come across a number system 1 to 10. Where 1 is hardly feel that and 10 is way too hard risking damage if carries on. She calls out the number and try to keep it at 6 to 7.