Does it actually work?

[Au****]

I find it weird, I can send tons of messages asking about something in their bio. which is a common interest with no reply but a hey goddess or hey slut get way more responses.

[ki****]

51 minutes ago, ChicagoSub90 said:

Personally, no. It's one reason I get so tired of these sites.

Could not agree with you more! People need to put the time in if they want to see the return. I support what you’re saying.

[Mo****]

A woman wants to know she is seen and seen as a human not just some sex doll or sex toy. I love sex and yes I love being slutty but that does not mean I want a guy to speak to me with respect. Show genuine interest in me as a person, another human being, I enjoy intellectual conversation and will show respect where respect is given.

[da****]

Yes it works because some women don’t take themselves as seriously as you do lol, I send lewd message, they send a lewd message back. We’re on a app to fuck, not have philosophical debates about how to approach women on a literal kink app

[pe****]

I keep it clean too later on you know if you decide to turn that way then I'll join in but sometimes the ads they put out there saying it themselves that's when I might say something to that effect in return

[No****]

I wouldn't know. But I guess it's the same as mentioned receiving a "Hello, how are you this fine day?" from fake profiles...

[No****]

*as men receiving...

[Mo****]

Yes we are on a kinknsite but I personally have to have a connection with someone I'm going to have fun with. I need to feel safe with someone I'm planning to give my body to. Lewd messages can come later. I don't object to them. I object to that being the way a man approaches me. I love when men get butthurt when a woman has standards for herself. In the bedroom is one thing, after yall have spoken and learned a bit about each other if yall are down for lewd messages then hell yeah! But don't start a convo by being lewd. Have some respect for her and for yourself for that matter. It makes men who do that look like toxic shovanistic pigs. Not all men are like that of course and yes there are women that are cool with being approached with lewd comments etc and toneach their own but have some respect and read people's profiles and respect what it says on them. If you dont like it you have the choice to move on and choose someone else. No one is forcing anyone to message anyone else.

[Mo****]

8 minutes ago, Noble-SyR said:

I wouldn't know. But I guess it's the same as mentioned receiving a "Hello, how are you this fine day?" from fake profiles...

Its dumb they dont have a way to stop bots. Ill bet a lot of men think most of us women here are bits due to that

[Lilacs_and_Lust]

1 hour ago, vvhitelie said:

Toxic guys are really outing themselves on this post 👀

Maybe that was my evil plan all along! You’re welcome everyone >;3 (jk it’s just an expected side effect)

[Ph****]

Even as a man if the first thing a woman said to me is something about her pussy I’m not into it. I think probably most men on here are overly sexual and a bit creepy. I’ve been around on fetlife since long before they had an app and it’s always kinda had that feeling.

[No****]

il y a 20 minutes, MoonlightTemptress said:

Its dumb they dont have a way to stop bots. Ill bet a lot of men think most of us women here are bits due to that

No, we can tell. Unfortunately, as in many things in life, the right prospects happen to be out of reach...😉

[Lilacs_and_Lust]

35 minutes ago, davidtafahema1989 said:

Yes it works because some women don’t take themselves as seriously as you do lol, I send lewd message, they send a lewd message back. We’re on a app to fuck, not have philosophical debates about how to approach women on a literal kink app

You seem really triggered by a question asked in good faith. I’m genuinely curious to know people’s opinions on this and your answer, though snarky, is enlightening thank you.

[Lilacs_and_Lust]

I really appreciate all of the varying opinions! It’s just fascinating to hear from different perspectives :3
I will just say that I do feel like some people are tapping on a point I’d like to throw out there for general consideration. There seems to be a lack of acknowledgment that sometimes, no matter how much effort is put into a message, the person on the other end is just not attracted to you.
I have received many engaging, thoughtful messages from people but that does not change that fact I did not have any interest in them visually (if that’s available and if it’s not it’s almost always a no from me) that could be another question of “if you haven’t sent something that offends that specific person would you want a message gently rejecting you rather than silence?” Maybe I’ll make another thread sometime but yeah thanks for the responses!

[Ar****]

1 hour ago, GoodGirlBetterBrat said:

Yeah but you can buy me ice cream next time I visit instead 😂

That seems more than acceptable 🥰

[Ar****]

47 minutes ago, Noble-SyR said:

I wouldn't know. But I guess it's the same as men receiving a "Hello, how are you this fine day?" from fake profiles...

It is absolutely not the same. Depending where you are and the content of the message one is potentially a malicious communication open to criminal charges if it causes distress to the recipient (and that's even if they don't cyberflash as well), whereas the other may be ill-intentioned but isn't actually illegal.

[La****]

2 hours ago, MisterSatisfaction said:

Maybe I could’ve said it differently. I watch hot guys send lewd messages or just “Hey” and have a success rate much higher than my success rate when sending the same messages plus messages that are thought out, done with effort, and from a place of wanting to converse and get to know someone.

Their success rate isn’t 100% because there are women who will block and report. But their success rate is still much higher than guys who aren’t hot.

Perhaps I'm unusual, but I don't think so. I don't respond to hey or hi or any kind of bland opening. I also won't respond to anything remotely sexual.

I wouldn't send messages like that either.

Do you have evidence to support these assumptions?

[No****]

il y a 53 minutes, Aranhis said:

It is absolutely not the same. Depending where you are and the content of the message one is potentially a malicious communication open to criminal charges if it causes distress to the recipient (and that's even if they don't cyberflash as well), whereas the other may be ill-intentioned but isn't actually illegal.

Showing your cock in public is illegal so, it could be debated.
I meant the same as in; disappointing, waste of time, annoying, etc.
Are you always this condescending, boy?

[Inquisitor4One]

1 hour ago, Lilacs_and_Lust said:

I really appreciate all of the varying opinions! It’s just fascinating to hear from different perspectives :3
I will just say that I do feel like some people are tapping on a point I’d like to throw out there for general consideration. There seems to be a lack of acknowledgment that sometimes, no matter how much effort is put into a message, the person on the other end is just not attracted to you.
I have received many engaging, thoughtful messages from people but that does not change that fact I did not have any interest in them visually (if that’s available and if it’s not it’s almost always a no from me) that could be another question of “if you haven’t sent something that offends that specific person would you want a message gently rejecting you rather than silence?” Maybe I’ll make another thread sometime but yeah thanks for the responses!

I think that would be a great question, that would get a lot of different responses.  I would actually prefer, that if someone appreciates the effort I put into a message, to send me a polite rejection.  But then again, I can take rejection.  Many people seem to be too sensitive, or have weak egos.  

[Lolitakitty86]

i HATE instant lewd messages. Even the people i am in relationships with don't talk to me that way unless i have consented to being their sex toy. Sometimes I ignore those messages, sometimes I toy with them till they get mad and block me. Either way i win and occasionally i enjoy myself.

[Mi****]

1 hour ago, Lady_Char said:

Perhaps I'm unusual, but I don't think so. I don't respond to hey or hi or any kind of bland opening. I also won't respond to anything remotely sexual.

I wouldn't send messages like that either.

Do you have evidence to support these assumptions?

I use a lot of different dating apps besides this one and on all of them no matter how much thought I put into opening messages or how much I genuinely try to have a conversation where I get to know someone the results are always the same. That’s why I kind of stopped sending well crafted thought out messages that showed my interest. That’s a lot of work to keep doing over and over for no return.

Meanwhile, I have hot guys friends who find partners/dates off dating apps and they legit don’t give much of a damn about connecting with women. They just want physical or emotional connection without having to do all the work of building a connection. So they will just get straight to the point in their messages, either physical (i.e. lewd-ish) or will just small talk and then quickly suggest meeting up.

I’m not speaking for everyone, but I just know in my experience I will do the things that are said to be the right way of doing something (have a decent bio, friendly pictures, find things in women’s profiles I’m intrigued by, then craft a message that’s witty and open ended), and not just because I think they’ll work but because I actually agree that that’s the right way to treat people and is how I want to treat people, and yet I have apps with close to zero matches and inboxes with unreplied to messages to the matches I have on rare occasion gotten