Does it actually work?

[ey****]

7 hours ago, JayBrendon said:

I'm gonna be 100% real with u, I think it's expected on a site like this

then your understanding is way off.

like on a site like this consent is front and centre.

I find it difficult to believe so many grown ass men are completely clueless on this. So those who send lewd messages are either (a) too fucking stupid to be dating (b) know full well it's not appropriate but do it anyway. (we could add a (c) they know the person they are messaging would be ok with it - which is different. But the word 'know' is important) 

[Ta****]

Its not for me, I find it rude when someone who doesnt know me, my kinks, triggers or where they might fit in thats if they do fit into my life. Degredation is something to be discussed with limits & boundaries not something to initiate chat with.

[Tr****]

8 hours ago, kindredkinks said:

That is honestly refreshing to read. Anyone can present a body. Very few people present a mind that is intentional, self-aware, and actually aligned with their values. That level of discernment tells me you are not here for noise. You are here for depth.

And you are right.
The psychological dynamic is the foundation. Without mental alignment, the rest is just surface-level performance bullshit.

Wanting to be mentally outmatched does not come across as arrogance. It reads more like intellectual curiosity mixed with trust in emotional structure and connection. That is a rare combination.

The part that stands out most is that you read profiles and look for mindset over aesthetics. That suggests you value presence, awareness, and psychological compatibility over impulse. That is exactly where real connection, and especially any meaningful power dynamic, actually lives.

If BDSM is a mind game, then the real question is not who is the most attractive.
It is who can engage with intention, emotional intelligence, and restraint.

Because the strongest dynamics are not built on control alone.
They are built on mutual understanding, mental tension, and the ability to hold depth without needing constant validation. What do you think? I’m excited to hear what you think.

This is what I am seeking as well all I'm gonna say is good luck I've had almost 10000 visitors to my profile and nothing yet it's so frustrating

[Deleted Member]

Yesterday at 01:08 AM, Noble-SyR said:

I wouldn't know. But I guess it's the same as mentioned receiving a "Hello, how are you this fine day?" from fake profiles...

Yeah that maybe true, however, I think it goes both ways. Even more for women. If a person has to spend more time sussing out if the person contacting you maybe fake then so be it. But give me a break about spending more time with fake accounts.

[Deleted Member]

8 hours ago, Lady_Char said:

I think it's important to bring your own value to BDSM. A sub isn't mindless, or dim, or a wallflower. Knowing who you are and being confident enough in yourself to let someone hold dominion over you is very important, I think.

Of course, we also bring our own pride along. I couldn't sub to someone I thought didn't see me and value me.

Love this. Knowing your own personal value is significant in both domains. But another important aspect is to be able to adapt to a situation or not being so stringent on the roles that one might take. It is imperative to understand that as well.

[le****]

Depends if your into it or not I like it I'm
Sure most guys do but it's understandable for women to feel upset but mostly it's to brake the ice like you seen me now I shouldent be emmbaresed like how that say invasion yourself necked when you are giving a s***ch lol same concept I think

[le****]

S***ch is a bad word??

[ey****]

4 hours ago, leon559420 said:

S***ch is a bad word??

no, but the 3 letters starred make up a bad word

I know

it's fucking stupid 

[wb****]

Yesterday I got a message from a guy whose first message to me was “cream pie and cuddle.” I responded with a simple “wow”. Keep in mind my profile is pretty dang specific on what I am and am not looking for. He then doubled down with something along the lines of; what to graphic; or something like that.
I didn’t even know how to respond. I just sent a “no thanks” and hide.

If that’s what you’re looking for you are on the wrong app.

[Rh****]

I roll my eyes at the males commenting "guys actually think that works" or "thats so insensitive, i would never start a convo like that." " Thats so rude, i block them" this next one takes the cake! "IT LETS ME know she isnt really interested in me or who i am" call me toxic masculinity but I wouldn't think those comments were made by men if it didnt say man. And claiming to be a dom has to be fraudulent . Hell idk maybe im Toxic maybe im insensitive, maybe Im a creep.
BUT LOOK HERE ....Ive HOOKED-EM WITH IT, and realed in a hookless line EVEN more. Might i Catch more fish if i beat around the bush first.. I guess its possible.. But chances are im gonna still send the vulgar message. Im into the true pleasure loving kink freaks. THOSE ARE THE GIRLS that seem to MATCH N VIBE WITH MY ENERGY BEST aswell as turn me in the most. FOR ME TO commit to one. She's gonna have to be a real naughty seXUAl KINK freak. And I figure the vulgarity will weed out the ladies disguised as the kink type as they use an app like this to find love . Which is fine. But we wont create that heightened sexual erotica. Ill be AN over THE TOP DEVIANT and youll be a little to plane.

[Tr****]

22 hours ago, RhinoRock83 said:

I roll my eyes at the males commenting "guys actually think that works" or "thats so insensitive, i would never start a convo like that." " Thats so rude, i block them" this next one takes the cake! "IT LETS ME know she isnt really interested in me or who i am" call me toxic masculinity but I wouldn't think those comments were made by men if it didnt say man. And claiming to be a dom has to be fraudulent . Hell idk maybe im Toxic maybe im insensitive, maybe Im a creep.
BUT LOOK HERE ....Ive HOOKED-EM WITH IT, and realed in a hookless line EVEN more. Might i Catch more fish if i beat around the bush first.. I guess its possible.. But chances are im gonna still send the vulgar message. Im into the true pleasure loving kink freaks. THOSE ARE THE GIRLS that seem to MATCH N VIBE WITH MY ENERGY BEST aswell as turn me in the most. FOR ME TO commit to one. She's gonna have to be a real naughty seXUAl KINK freak. And I figure the vulgarity will weed out the ladies disguised as the kink type as they use an app like this to find love . Which is fine. But we wont create that heightened sexual erotica. Ill be AN over THE TOP DEVIANT and youll be a little to plane.

I do not see the point of being offended when there are so many other things I could be lol after all it is very sexualy charged application I assume it comes with the territory...also if I do get offended 9 times out of 10 if you speak up and communicate and tell them vulgarity is not your jam they apologize and stop

[Tr****]

March 1, wbl51265 said:

Yesterday I got a message from a guy whose first message to me was “cream pie and cuddle.” I responded with a simple “wow”. Keep in mind my profile is pretty dang specific on what I am and am not looking for. He then doubled down with something along the lines of; what to graphic; or something like that.
I didn’t even know how to respond. I just sent a “no thanks” and hide.

If that’s what you’re looking for you are on the wrong app.

I understand you have specific likes etc stated but I'm curious why you say that this is the wrong app for specifically asking if you like cream pies and cuddle? Cream pies is a choice to pick when you fill out your likes and dislikes turn on etc... I would have appreciated the honest question instead of deception he could of pretended to have other intentions
Is it possible you misinterpreted his intentions I think cream pies is a kink and this is a kink site I mean no disrespect just curious is all

[Sa****]

On here I expect it. Let's be honest we all know why we are here. Would I prefer you at least say hi firsr..ya but I dont expect it HERE!

But out irl its so disgusting. If you cant say it to your mom then dont say it to me until I show interest.