Da**** Posted March 19 Author Update: I have been in contact with her today. Her job has had her doing 16 hour days revamping a location.. she has been training new staff and will be moving to her own store in the near future. What was to be a 2 week job of traning a new manager shifted on her suddenly to a bottom up retrain and restarting do to failing to meet standards by previous management.. damn even typing that made me tired..but the question is still valid, not for this situation but in general.. I agree with a number who have answered. Communication is important so are having realistic expectations especially in a D/S relationship. The question is out there.. let's keep the discussion going.. how can such situations be minimized? How do you open the topic of priorities? Not just in an ldr situation but any relationship where cohabitation is not currently in the cards.
ey**** Posted March 19 1 hour ago, Dash121 said: Update: I have been in contact with her today. Her job has had her doing 16 hour days revamping a location.. she has been training new staff and will be moving to her own store in the near future. yep, that'll explain it 1 hour ago, Dash121 said: How do you open the topic of priorities? Not just in an ldr situation but any relationship where cohabitation is not currently in the cards. carefully because it can come across entitled and needy. Like her job is currently demanding more of her attention for now - but also it's her job that, well, pays the bills. If you decided to end because you're not a priority, then, she needs to pay her bills. If she pushes back on her job then - yeah, career stagnation and so forth. The time demands won't be permanent.
Da**** Posted March 19 Author Well said.. she pays her bills and it is her career.. she wants to transfer closer next year, but she has to put in the time first...and I admit I have higher communication expectations then any previous partner in and out of the lifestyle.. so I know that is also taking getting used to
an**** Posted March 19 Im struggling with unmedicated adhd or something of the like and if something or someone isnt right in front of me, i can forget they exist. I dont know if thats her deal but i thought i should throw that random piece of useless info out there. I forgot about my aloe vera plant for like a year and god help anything that ends up in a box in storage
Es**** Posted March 20 1 hour ago, anonfor2day said: Im struggling with unmedicated adhd or something of the like and if something or someone isnt right in front of me, i can forget they exist. I dont know if thats her deal but i thought i should throw that random piece of useless info out there. I forgot about my aloe vera plant for like a year and god help anything that ends up in a box in storage That 100% sounds like ADHD we often struggle with a variation of object permanence. It's not so much we forget it exists. But that we forget it needs us. Lol
vv**** Posted March 20 It could be communication burnout. I also have unmedicated ADHD and while sometimes I just reply to texts in my head instead of actually replying, I also get completely burned out by staying in constant contact. I don’t know if that’s an ADHD specific thing or just introverted behavior or what but it definitely happens and I’ll feel bad about disappearing for a few days.
cu**** Posted March 20 I’m really bad at that… I always put partners first… and I get obsessive and attached quickly. I have no advice, other than to try to be forgiving, and try not to stress
Ro**** Posted March 20 Tell her, if someone I'm seeing was feeling this way, I would want them to say something. It may not be within her capacity to keep contact at the moment if other things are overwhelming her. Don't approach as if she lacks in her part. Approach out of concern for her mental well-being. Let her know it's been noticed and you miss her. If you get minimal response, accept it. Life changes. Do not take it personally, it is not meant that way.
Deleted Member Posted March 20 Hi mate, If it’s to hard it’s to f*cking hard. Stop wasting your time and move on there are heaps of women out there get one that lives closer to you too and she replies back to your messages in a heartbeat. Got a suggestion join Fetlife online.
Al**** Posted March 20 yeah just tell her you are not upset with her but you need more than she's ready to give .
Jo**** Posted March 23 If she’s focusing more on work than you and you’re portraying yourself as Dom. Life comes before work for mental sanity. Always. If she wants work more than you- move on.
de**** Posted March 23 Id just be straight up with her.. tell her how you feel where you want to be and see if that's an option. It seems like you like her or wouldn't be asking here, so.. I mean if your the Dom in this relationship id definitely be saying something 🤔
Ga**** Posted March 24 Ill just say as generaø relationship advice: kommunikative is important, reflect on how you feel and tell her how you feel. Discuss with her where you are in your relationship and life and what wishes and priorities you both have. Be it D/s, a friendship or romantic relationship, the rules are kind of the same in everyone involved need to be on the same page, a one sided relationship is an unhappy one.
su**** Posted March 29 Idk what to tell you bc for me work comes above all else bc I am the only one supporting me and paying my own bills. Im poly and my bf is the same way. It sounds like you need to have a conversation about expectations and see if she can accommodate your need but if she cant, you'll have to see yourself out gracefully or make concessions.
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