Why sissification is so connected to ***?

[si****]

I am very inexperienced when it comes to kink. However, I do know what I like and I have a bit of experience there. However, whenever I go online to read and whatnot about sissification, a lot of is always about the sissy being humiliated, ***d, being cruel to the sissy, blackmailing, being cock obsessed, or the sissy just being a knock off woman.

This makes it seem like being a sissy is a bad thing and something people should be ashamed of.

I know there are people who are into all of those things I mentioned above, and that’s fine, but why is it that it seems that you can’t be a sissy unless you are also into all of those things as well?

[Ra****]

You know there could be a lot of answers to this. But I'll throw in my $0.02 as someone that used to refer themselves as a sissy but no longer does.

I'm definitely one of those people that doesn't love how the lifestyle sometimes takes a definition and says you have to do this or be that to fit the description. It's funny because it's out of one side of their mouth many of these people say we should be able to like what we like as long as it's between consenting adults but from the other side they condemn other people for liking what they like if it doesn't fit their strengths definitions of a certain term. To me it's slightly hypocritical.

I think you can identify as a sissy and not be into all of those kinks. We are all individual people with different likes and preferences and you can be into some of them but you don't have to be into all of them. What's important is what are your own personal boundaries and what are your own personal interests.

For me one of the reasons I moved away from referring to myself as a sissy is because for me it is a little bit more tied too sex and domination. Once I started realizing I wasn't dressing up anymore for scenes and more dressing because that's who I felt I was, I started relating more to being a trans woman then a sissy.

[ey****]

like a lot of things, sissy is a bit of a tangled web

and a lot of what is on the wider internet is often a mixture between common fantasies, and what sells

This doesn't invalidate what being a sissy means *to you*

Especially, as there are a lot of problematic elements to sissy play, some sometimes linked to the above depending on overall context.  

[Ra****]

Just now, eyemblacksheep said:

like a lot of things, sissy is a bit of a tangled web

and a lot of what is on the wider internet is often a mixture between common fantasies, and what sells

This doesn't invalidate what being a sissy means *to you*

Especially, as there are a lot of problematic elements to sissy play, some sometimes linked to the above depending on overall context.  

This gentleman summed it up in way less words than me. Lol

[Ms****]

I think this happens with anyone who is walking in a "known" identity. In the end, you get to decide the decorum, limits, boundaries, and expression of your identity. If you enjoy being a sissy, it can be whatever experience you desire, despite what is the "norm".
I was going to go into the psychology of how women are seen and treated in society, but Im not sure that is helpful for answering your question.
I wish you the best in finding what makes tour heart sing.

[Ra****]

1 minute ago, MsRed32514 said:

I think this happens with anyone who is walking in a "known" identity. In the end, you get to decide the decorum, limits, boundaries, and expression of your identity. If you enjoy being a sissy, it can be whatever experience you desire, despite what is the "norm".
I was going to go into the psychology of how women are seen and treated in society, but Im not sure that is helpful for answering your question.
I wish you the best in finding what makes tour heart sing.

It may not be relevant to this discussion but if you were to create your own forum post discussing this I think it is still a worthwhile discussion and point.

I did not realize a lot of these things that I think you're going to say until I started becoming a woman on a more full-time basis. It was definitely eye-opening to the trials and tribulation women face everyday.

[ja****]

Where I am from sissy is a thing you say to a weak pathetic man, even outside of bdsm context, from there it would be implied sissyfication is making someone a weak or even weaker and more pathetic man and taking away the manlyness, the whole panties and girl clothes comes second to further make him weaker and more pathetic and to humiliate him… also why sissies are not considered trans women imho… another example is that for me sissy implies ***d bi stuff, very much unlike trans women… so yes I think there is a cruel and *** aspect from the history of things and where it comes from, otherwise what would be the difference to being trans or cross dressing?

[Go****]

First and correct me if I’m wrong. I see trans and sissy completely separate. To me sissy seem grounded in misogyny. Not kink shaming just not my thing.

[Ra****]

1 minute ago, GoblinB1 said:

First and correct me if I’m wrong. I see trans and sissy completely separate. To me sissy seem grounded in misogyny. Not kink shaming just not my thing.

Definitely one of the reasons I moved away from identifying as such once I started presenting as female in public.

[si****]

1 hour ago, jackyandhide said:

Where I am from sissy is a thing you say to a weak pathetic man, even outside of bdsm context, from there it would be implied sissyfication is making someone a weak or even weaker and more pathetic man and taking away the manlyness, the whole panties and girl clothes comes second to further make him weaker and more pathetic and to humiliate him… also why sissies are not considered trans women imho… another example is that for me sissy implies ***d bi stuff, very much unlike trans women… so yes I think there is a cruel and *** aspect from the history of things and where it comes from, otherwise what would be the difference to being trans or cross dressing?

For me sissy is just in the bedroom liking to wear feminine clothes and acting in a submissive manner. I don’t know much about the history of “sissy”, but I do know it is used as an insult.

It is possible I am using the wrong term for myself, and I am more of a CD. But I was never a fan of trying to find the exact label that is right for me

[Ke****]

1 hour ago, GoblinB1 said:

First and correct me if I’m wrong. I see trans and sissy completely separate. To me sissy seem grounded in misogyny. Not kink shaming just not my thing.

Thats exactly right, being trans and sissy are 2 completely different things. Sissy is more of a role where as trans is a total life change and not fulfilling a role

[Ro****]

There has been a shift in attitude since the trans community became more visible and accepted. I was never comfortable with the *** aspects and actually felt my cross dressing was more aspirational than humiliating.

[DrStarlight]

To me I find sissification inherently misogynistic as it implies being feminine as week. I prefer feminization play as it can be freeing and empowering for the sub.

[ey****]

7 hours ago, GoblinB1 said:

First and correct me if I’m wrong. I see trans and sissy completely separate. To me sissy seem grounded in misogyny. Not kink shaming just not my thing.

So. Yes. For the best part trans and sissy are different. However, there are some people who experiment with different forms of feminism or gender play, including sissy play, as part of coming to terms on if they are trans.  Though that is something that some people do and isn't universal.

Sissy play over the years I've met some awesome sissies with great attitudes and approaches and some where, yeah, there is misogyny at play - any form of play which is "feminine is lesser than masculine therefore being feminine is humiliating" ties in with that.  Equally a lot of the "real woman" thing within some forms of gender play can be quite problematic also - I am not saying it's always the case. 

Some sissies with a positive attitude feel there sissy persona is MORE than they are.  Equally, also a sissy attitude of being beneath both men and women is also a common trait.  That the sissy may be a servant or maid to women, they are beneath them in the heirarchy. During play, at least.  This is something which does get played on in a lot of online content. 

This of course said, whilst not really my place to speak I am aware of trans women who have had struggles where they know they are not a man but sometimes feel they're not "good enough" to be woman which in itself I'm sure is a horrible place to be but not really linked to role play or online content.

[Ro****]

8 hours ago, DrStarlight said:

To me I find sissification inherently misogynistic as it implies being feminine as week. I prefer feminization play as it can be freeing and empowering for the sub.

Yes. This resonates with me. I became a cross dresser because a dominant decided she wanted me as one and I always enjoyed the dressing and play but necmver saw it as humiliating. Is this what you mean by gender play?

[DrStarlight]

8 hours ago, RoseSatin said:

Yes. This resonates with me. I became a cross dresser because a dominant decided she wanted me as one and I always enjoyed the dressing and play but necmver saw it as humiliating. Is this what you mean by gender play?

For me, I engage in it if my sub wants to explore their more feminine side. It’s not a requirement for me when I dom someone. Some have realized through feminization play that they have realized they identify as trans/gender fluid after. I think it’s because I’ve created a safe space for them for explore.

[Ro****]

1 hour ago, DrStarlight said:

For me, I engage in it if my sub wants to explore their more feminine side. It’s not a requirement for me when I dom someone. Some have realized through feminization play that they have realized they identify as trans/gender fluid after. I think it’s because I’ve created a safe space for them for explore.

Yes, early on I did explore gender identity. But realised it wasn't me. It's very much a private thing for me.

[al****]

19 hours ago, DrStarlight said:

To me I find sissification inherently misogynistic as it implies being feminine as week. I prefer feminization play as it can be freeing and empowering for the sub.

Exactly this. Every single time. When I engage in talks with sissies, it always ends up in some form of "not good enough to be a man" of "not a real man" or "like to be dominated by real men." They most certainly imply feminine is inherently weaker, lesser, and inferior to "real men." It's an insult to all women, cis and trans.

[Ra****]

2 minutes ago, alexisleigh1100 said:

Exactly this. Every single time. When I engage in talks with sissies, it always ends up in some form of "not good enough to be a man" of "not a real man" or "like to be dominated by real men." They most certainly imply feminine is inherently weaker, lesser, and inferior to "real men." It's an insult to all women, cis and trans.

I'm with you girl. And to be honest it's way more fun and way more interesting to be dominated by a "real woman" lol 😂

[si****]

6 minutes ago, alexisleigh1100 said:

Exactly this. Every single time. When I engage in talks with sissies, it always ends up in some form of "not good enough to be a man" of "not a real man" or "like to be dominated by real men." They most certainly imply feminine is inherently weaker, lesser, and inferior to "real men." It's an insult to all women, cis and trans.

I may have the wrong term for me then 😂, because I don’t think like that at all!!

I am not interested in men (not even in getting pegged by a woman 😅). But the thought of getting dominated by a woman makes me weak in the knees.

The dressing up as a woman while in bed is just an added bonus that makes it even more fun

[DrStarlight]

7 minutes ago, alexisleigh1100 said:

Exactly this. Every single time. When I engage in talks with sissies, it always ends up in some form of "not good enough to be a man" of "not a real man" or "like to be dominated by real men." They most certainly imply feminine is inherently weaker, lesser, and inferior to "real men." It's an insult to all women, cis and trans.

That’s why I have sissification as a limit on my profile.

[Ms****]

20 hours ago, DrStarlight said:

To me I find sissification inherently misogynistic as it implies being feminine as week. I prefer feminization play as it can be freeing and empowering for the sub.

Very well said, 100 % agree

[al****]

1 hour ago, Raven_Sinclair said:

I'm with you girl. And to be honest it's way more fun and way more interesting to be dominated by a "real woman" lol 😂

Especially where I am. Most of the "dom" men say they are dom because "i take what I want" or "I like rough sex." They are so mid or cringe or ratchet or whatever the word is today.

[Ul****]

While things are evr evolving, there are a few folks that don't understand where things come from and the history behind them.
The term sissy in a derogatory manner is an old 19th century insult towards boys and men who didn't conform to the masculine standards of the day.

Now, in terms of kink.. It is more often used within the gay community and, in turn, by those who are very submissive and enjoy *** kinks, and it has been for many years. It was never about wearing pretty dresses and bows in your hair, though many who described themselves as being a sissy would do this, as it was a male feminization of themselves. (As someone already pointed out, it is a misogynistic view, seemingly from previous generational views of women being weaker.)
This is where the confusion comes from. If you call yourself a sissy and others who have been part of the kink scene or gay community for a long time, see this, then they will see you and treat you accordingly. Even today, where a lot of sissies wear the pretty dresses, it's still seen as a very submissive position to take, so again, don't be surprised if you're treated accordingly.
What a lot of people has described as wearing women's and girls clothing and not being submissive or gay is being a transvestite or transvestic fetishism (something that doesn't have anything to do with being trans or gay, but many men who do this feel empowered by wearing women's clothing)
You may feel like this should change, but then that would be invalidating all those who described themselves as being a sissy, are submissive, and enjoy being degraded and the struggles and hardships they have faced to be accepted.

[piaggiomp3]

I embrace being a sissy it take away any manlyness making you look small and pathetic the dress short enough to show what ever your made to wear underneath , I guess i just like to submit and not have the power of a real man