Make or break?

[xR****]

Slightly misleading title. What is something that would make or break your relationship? Not necessarily just from a d/s perspective, but a relationship in general? Something that would either make you stay or make you leave?

I'll go first:

Touch. Touch is a sense of security for me and my love language. Without touch, I feel alone and secluded. Even in a relationship, if that is not present, I don't feel like I am even with someone.

Another is consistency and follow through. If you are going to say you are going to do something, do it. If you set rules, make sure they are abided by. Without structure, I tend to withdraw.

So, what are yours?

[stenli]

For me it will be breaking if she doesn’t follow any of my main rules and instructions

[ra****]

Dependence. I have no desire to be everything for one person nor do I expect one person to be everything to me. That requires altering who I are which we all see with to say we won’t change ourselves for another.

[Ve****]

Dishonesty, unreliable. Cheap with their emotions, *** or energy. Unhealed trauma. Do the work on yourself rather than perpetuating, unhealthy or toxic relationship.

Green flags are authenticity, integrity, resilience, a sense of humor, and a sense of joy.

[metronome]

Lies. Period. Once there's lies, it's no longer a relationship but a manipulation.

[lo****]

I so agree about touch. Touch is my love language too, and without it the emotional connection fades fast. The other, obvious deal breakers, like lying, go without saying. Once the casual hand on the back or quick kiss stop happening, the distance between us grows quickly.

[Ro****]

For me, it’s respect for my solo poly lifestyle. A relationship works or breaks based on how a partner honors my time, attention, and autonomy. Talk is cheap—I look for consistent actions that show they truly understand and value my independence.

[PL****]

I have a few 1. Lies 2. Cheating and 3. Ignoring my needs

[Mr****]

If dishonesty comes into play it causes me to rethink everything else that has happend (I hate Hate second guessing and over thinking is what the person has told me the truth or lie.) disloyalty is an automatic deal breaker.

[va****]

Lying/dishonesty. It just shows a complete lack of respect and it almost never works out in our favor in the end anyways.

[so****]

Cheating/dishonety.
If you for example are in an open relationship that’s not cheating because you were both honest about what is going to happen
But if you agree to monogamous relationship and then have relationships with someone else that crosses a boundary and breaks the trust

[Deleted Member]

Be honest with me open minded I never judge so don't be judgemental if we're doing anything together please be yourself know how to enjoy yourself cause I want something different and special

[ja****]

Lies and lack of being open and honest with your partner... It's what ended my last relationship.

[ba****]

Lies,trying to change people and not being open and honest and don't be judgemental.

[ma****]

Not being open and honest from the start. Just put your cards on the table at the outset, saves us both from having to reevaluate later on

[Fa****]

Communication and sexual compatibility require honesty and open communication when appropriate. For me, there must be genuine enjoyment and a natural connection during sex, with no faking. Both partners should be able to truly let go and be on the same page.

[Br****]

For me one of the most important things are that I am not the only person putting any effort in. As when I am the only person initiating conversation or making plans, it makes me feel like they don’t care or used.

A relationship should be where both sides put in the effort to do things. It can’t be that only one of us puts in all the effort

[dr****]

My love language is being honest and open minded about things that make you feel like a slut in public but not in private so I can be aware of the consequences if I have an attachment to you and I have only 1 beak and that’s being left in the dark

[to****]

With a man if he's not ***ful enough I want a man to smack my a** yank my hair a bit to let me know he's the man .with a woman If she's to quiet I'm not the most talkative person so she needs to be at least a bit more talkative then me also if she won't share her sexy clothes 😉

[un****]

I'd say there's only a few. 1. Don't lie to me. You simply don't have to. 2. Cheating. It's really easy. If it's time to cheat, it's time to leave. (And I'm not talking ethical non monogamy. ) A3. Equality. No one person should have to bear the whole burden. You're a couple. SHARE. Can't figure it out? Grow the hell up. 5. PLEASE DO NOT argue with me in public. Im NOT saying don't disagree. I'm saying that in public, we need to have a united front. People PREY ON WEAKNESSES

[Ra****]

I had a girlfriend way back when that I decided not to sleep with just yet, and she responded by telling me if I won't have sex with her she is going to find someone that will, and then she ran up to a group of guys around the same age and I went back to where we were staying with friends and I was pretty ***ed off and didn't know what to expect. 6 hours later she returns, giggling and unable to wipe a smile from her face. She then sits in front of me and as she looks into my eyes, tells me in detail that 6 guys took her back to their motel rooms and ran a train on her for the entire time she was gone. I was in love with her so it hurt to be told that, but I also found it turned me on a lot too, but felt really ashamed that I was and would have been judged and teased if I told anyone. I was hurt and really angry at her, but I also really wanted to be inside her.
I was what lead to me ending it with her a month later but if I knew what I know now back then, I think I may have stayed with her.

[Nv****]

Consistency 100% this ghosting society is wild. Talk every day then make plans and its crickets.

After that touch is important as well as the ability to communicate

[Ra****]

Don't ghost me. If we meet and you're not into me then don't have sex and then ghost me. So immature.

Laughing with me every day and being a confidant that will listen and work through a problem are both very important to me.

[Sc****]

I find it impossible to connect with someone if I can’t TOUCH them.

LYING/CHEATING; as a dom I will offer plenty of opportunities for play time with others both men and women. If there is someone you want to sleep with, let’s talk about it. Doing it behind my back is not going to be ok.

Breaking the same rule over and over and over….

[Md****]

Lying, cheating, not being who you claim to be online.