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Question for self identified "caregivers"


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Was trying to be nice and clean my exs room for her and found her little stuff. Then I just loved how sweet and affectionate the dynamic could be and enjoyed looking after a little so much that 12 years later Im still a daddy 🫣

As someone else said, its almost like a drug.
Throughout human history, we've evolved to cooperate with each other, particularly for the capable to take care of the more *** people in society. I believe caregiving heavily leans into this aspect of human nature.
It is a wonderful feeling to feel useful, protective, nurturing and needed for someone else who is either struggling or *** in some aspect, particularly when they respond with gratitude and affection.

I've had a few littles to take care of, and it is the best feeling in the world to feel the trust they put in you and giving them that sense of safety and stability that they need, and knowing you are improving their life.
Making your partner feel needed, is in my eyes, the greatest treasure anyone can give someone else.

Natural empathy, love language is often services for your fellow person of interest out of heart. Seeing someone genuinely happy makes me a happy bedfellow. šŸ˜šŸŒ¹

I always have this tendency and urge to spoiled of someone. It’s so strong. Somehow, having someone ā€˜depend’ or crave on my care is making me tingly. Then I realize it’s more than just an urge but a desire and giving me big sexual fulfillment. Also, seeing someone being childlike and sweet, sulky and being such a spoiled baby drive me crazy. I’m also into dollmaking so pampering is a no brainer.

My validation comes from knowing I’ve done a good job, especially when it’s from offering what I also need and enjoy too. Always want to see a positive outcome from my impact on something.

And the more someone validates me with my desires and needs, the more they’ll get in return.

I wouldn’t say that’s a ā€œroleā€ to play that we are attracted to . Rather it is what defines your character and heavily imbibed in .
It is what described my personality , my show of care for partner , my duty …

12 minutes ago, Dave-Lothbrok said:

I wouldn’t say that’s a ā€œroleā€ to play that we are attracted to . Rather it is what defines your character and heavily imbibed in .
It is what described my personality , my show of care for partner , my duty …

I also believe for it to work it’s required both sides of the coin to work together to stay on that loop of mutual validation/satisfsction.

There has to be that ā€˜want’ there on both sides for their own part in that particular dance.

Agree on the character part, has to be something deep within you

1 minute ago, Loganmjol said:

I also believe for it to work it’s required both sides of the coin to work together to stay on that loop of mutual validation/satisfsction.

There has to be that ā€˜want’ there on both sides for their own part in that particular dance.

Agree on the character part, has to be something deep within you

With all due respect - showing care MUST be free or any expectation of validation . Otherwise it is just a show off

2 hours ago, Lady_King said:

I always have this tendency and urge to spoiled of someone. It’s so strong. Somehow, having someone ā€˜depend’ or crave on my care is making me tingly. Then I realize it’s more than just an urge but a desire and giving me big sexual fulfillment. Also, seeing someone being childlike and sweet, sulky and being such a spoiled baby drive me crazy. I’m also into dollmaking so pampering is a no brainer.

Like actual dolls or is this a kink thing I don't understand?

Honestly, I didn’t even think I was a caregiver until an ex told me I was such a good caregiver. It’s something that’s always come naturally to me and it simply feels good to have someone trust you so much they just relax into your arms and let you tend to them.

I think this is innate to someone's nature really. Some people just do it out of their own nature.

These are all very insightful. Thank you so much for sharing, everyone! šŸ’–

It's hilarious, but I was drawn to it because I deeply enjoyed being a caregiver in my profession. I love to help and take care of someone(physically or emotionally). It makes my heart melt seeing someone happy, so I just kinda wound up here

5 hours ago, BunnyGirlGamer91 said:

Like actual dolls or is this a kink thing I don't understand?

A kink. It’s called dollmaking and I’m a dollmaker. For over-simplified definition; the maker making someone as their dream doll.
Beautifying them, love them, *** them etc. Depends on how the maker wants the doll to be like or how they would treat them. The doll will, well-act like a doll. Inanimate-like.

7 hours ago, Lady_King said:

A kink. It’s called dollmaking and I’m a dollmaker. For over-simplified definition; the maker making someone as their dream doll.
Beautifying them, love them, *** them etc. Depends on how the maker wants the doll to be like or how they would treat them. The doll will, well-act like a doll. Inanimate-like.

Interesting. I've never heard of that.

I am naturally a seeker of beautiful things, beautiful minds, beautiful hearts, beautiful words and beautiful actions.

When I see those things in someone, affection comes very easily to me.

The loving things I say/do aren't dependent on what someone says back, they're my truth about the beauty I see in them.

Words of adoration and cherishment tend to flow like water from a glass because I'm not searching for them or manufacturing them, they're already there.

That's what draws me towards those who appreciate care. I don't identify as a caregiver (per se) as my care is universal for everyone I interact with in all capacities, the bank teller, an email, a client, a sub, a past relationship all met with my highest care no matter what I receive in return.

I genuinely enjoy making people I care about feel safe, valued, protected and cherished, without needing equal repayment for it.

Even when relationships break down, can't exist, or boundaries get crossed, that doesn't require me to rewrite how I feel about someone.

Their access to me may become limited or disappear entirely, but that is a boundary, not a declaration that they suddenly have no beauty or value.

I can love someone and still tell them, you don't get access to me anymore. My boundaries can change. My words will still come from the heart.


When?
I don't remember ever feeling different.


How was it the thing?
I have experience with subs who wanted little caretaking and ones that do not.

Caretaking was very satisfying because there was such a strong amount of contentment for the smallest things. That is the draw.


Feeling needed and the need being simple and the immediate appreciation for a snack or an item, or a drink, or a choice, or anything. And then they act like that tiny thing was an elaborate Christmas gift or new car (big smiles, many thank yous, and a face that lights up). Then repeat that, and repeat that. It's really nice.

For a giver, having someone roll around on the floor just in their own head in la la land while you get to keep them safe and take care of the entire world around them so they can be awareness '***' makes you feel like you are the only person that matters. That is huge for a giver, like catnip huge.

Feels good and "right" if you know what i mean. Things feel correct, as they should be etc. Sense of fulfilment of purpose.

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