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How to care for The Brat, by Kink Inc

AKA_Copper

By AKA_Copper
in Online Munch

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AKA_Copper

AKA_Copper

Posted
SATIRE

The Brat is a 'colourful' product made from the petals of the naughty ass flower. It grows more and more infuriating, uh we mean rewarding in time.
However, Kink Inc are aware of various complaints about this product line. What follows are care instructions which serve to prevent any further returns to the warehouse (please, stop sending The Brat back to us, we don't want them!)

The Brat is an 'advanced' product, if you're having difficulties with yours, Kink Inc suggest that you should have opted for the Real Sub product instead, (you made your choice, you've made your bed...etc etc). But, we at Kink Inc have faith in your ability to serve The Brat with these few handy hints...

The Brat always does better with bedazzled hitty things. A bucket of water balloons should be given to her prior to any spanking as, The Brat is inherently unable to safeword (we put that on the box, for you so no whinging!)

Nothing wears The Brat out like obedience so your product will require a minimum of at least one punishment a day. This should also involve bedazzled hitty things.

When untied, The Brat should be stood in the corner, of a room, the other side of the house, on a different floor. She'll most likely throw those water balloons at her sub after a punishment (er, we meant Dom)

After it becomes bored of the balloons you should treat it with Kink Incs new product line, Plenty of Ice cream. This should be enough distraction from what she really wants, that Ted Baker dress. If this doesn't work, Kink Inc suggest you buy the dress else in the morning, you may wake to a missing eyebrow (yours not hers).
Kink Inc will not be held liable for a loss of facial hair, see clause 19 under the Buyer Beware warning on the product box.

Despite its horrible tendency to place googly eyes on your unmentionables, The Brat has many many positives including, bringing fun and glitter in to your household

Which brings Kink Inc to our last care tip. Store The Brat in a glitter free room when not in use. Despite its whines to sleep in the Domly Doms bed, be the strong Dom you are and make it a rule, this habit may cause you to wake with a full face of drag makeup, Kink Inc have warned you, again, check the products box - clause 6 under the Buyer Beware warning!

Research shows that those who have used The Brat for one month feel happier and more ***ed off in equal measure. Those that have had her for more than a year feel more energised and insanely infuriated which is why Kink Inc are giving away their remaining stock of The Brat FOC.
AKA_Copper

AKA_Copper

Posted
  • Author
18 hours ago, TheScribe said:

What could you possibly add to this? ~rolls eyes~

What else needs to be added?

Deleted Member

Posted
32 minutes ago, CopperKnob said:

What else needs to be added?

Nothing at all, my lady, a happy brat is a good brat as they say? I would much rather she sat there purring feeling pleased than sticking googly eyes on my unmentionables. That would just be scary.

AKA_Copper

AKA_Copper

Posted
  • Author
21 hours ago, kree90 said:
I need more of these!

I'm thinking some more up 😉

Deleted Member

Posted
1 minute ago, CopperKnob said:

I'm thinking some more up 😉

~gives up all hope and goes to find a stiff drink~ :P

AKA_Copper

AKA_Copper

Posted
  • Author
1 hour ago, TheScribe said:

~gives up all hope and goes to find a stiff drink~ :P

Its fine if you can't keep up but remember, no one likes a quitter

Deleted Member

Posted
Just now, CopperKnob said:

Its fine if you can't keep up but remember, no one likes a quitter

~laughs~ like most of the D types in here feeling a little brattered :) #sorrynotsorry I shall see myself out shall I..

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