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Newbie mentors


Curvygirl1

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Posted

Is there a possibility for us to offer mentorship to newbies?

 

I'd be happy to help newbie subs.

Posted

This is something you can certainly both list on your profile that you'd be willing to do; and of course to reach out to others.

Though mentorship can be very laborious, and there are a lot of newbies

Posted
1 hour ago, FETMOD-KF said:

This is something you can certainly both list on your profile that you'd be willing to do; and of course to reach out to others.

Though mentorship can be very laborious, and there are a lot of newbies

I have done it before,  i figure there is lots of us that could do this

Posted
Brilliant idea. The subbie ***hood/brotherhood should rally round and keep the newbies safe and educated. Yes it is a lot of work, but between you all it will be a valuable contribution.
Posted
56 minutes ago, TheScribe said:

Brilliant idea. The subbie ***hood/brotherhood should rally round and keep the newbies safe and educated. Yes it is a lot of work, but between you all it will be a valuable contribution.

Dear Scribe

I actually hope some D types will also help out newer D types so they can benefit from info on various things D types like eg rope play including types of ropes, ties, emergency releases, where to tie, etc just for starters

Posted
40 minutes ago, Curvygirl1 said:

Dear Scribe

I actually hope some D types will also help out newer D types so they can benefit from info on various things D types like eg rope play including types of ropes, ties, emergency releases, where to tie, etc just for starters

I am sure some of the more experienced riggers will help out. For my part I don't have a clue about rope, as it has never been my thing (shock horror) yet I have approached a ropemeister on another platform for help...it is time I learned and added to my skillset x

Posted
50 minutes ago, Curvygirl1 said:

Dear Scribe

I actually hope some D types will also help out newer D types so they can benefit from info on various things D types like eg rope play including types of ropes, ties, emergency releases, where to tie, etc just for starters

I personally wouldnt mentor someone in rope, especially online and would rather point them to peer rope groups to get the training they need.

Besides there are a lot of "riggers" on here who post pictures that i wouldnt trust to tie a dog to a post nevermind a human being, and will give people dangerous tips and potentially cause serious ***.

Posted

rope was just an example to get the conversation started

Posted
3 minutes ago, TheBookCollector said:

I personally wouldnt mentor someone in rope, especially online and would rather point them to peer rope groups to get the training they need.

Besides there are a lot of "riggers" on here who post pictures that i wouldnt trust to tie a dog to a post nevermind a human being, and will give people dangerous tips and potentially cause serious ***.

That is exactly the point, fella, an experienced rope user would direct a newbie to somewhere appropriate to get REAL training.

Posted
5 minutes ago, Curvygirl1 said:

rope was just an example to get the conversation started

I understand that, and i was making the poimt that there are elements of this lifestyle that you couldnt mentor someone in.

The other issue with mentoring is that people can get bad advice, who polices the mentors to make sure the advice they are providing is good advice and not bad advice.

Posted
1 minute ago, TheBookCollector said:

I understand that, and i was making the poimt that there are elements of this lifestyle that you couldnt mentor someone in.

The other issue with mentoring is that people can get bad advice, who polices the mentors to make sure the advice they are providing is good advice and not bad advice.

Everything you are saying is valid, fella, however none of it offers POSITIVE advice or solutions? This is a good thing here, and from what I gather you have been around a fair while, so will know of a time when the ***hood took care of its own. It is exactly what something like this needs..those with real time experience and not keyboard warriors. If CurvyGirl needs help, then the old guard need to step up.

Posted

I think while you can't mentor *everything* online, this certainly doesn't mean to, instead, do nothing

mentoring could be "there is a peer rope event coming up near you.  I recommend you attend"

mentoring could by psyching someone up to go to a munch (and telling them the craic)

mentoring could be giving someone some tips on approaching someone they like

mentoring could be suggestions for toys

so on

 

Posted

For me.

Every now and then someone will ask me to mentor them - to date, it's always been a no - because it's usually someone I don't know and - I think, it's not really in my appetite - knowing how time consuming it can be.    There was someone a couple of years ago I was giving a lot of mentor-like support to and then one day, without a trace, they deleted their profile never to be seen again - and it felt emotionally draining

So, I dunno - I kinda do mentor indirectly via stuff like blogs, and forum posts and replying on topics 

It would really have to be the right person to do any form of one-to-one mentoring with.

All power to you.

Posted
I think it is a great idea obviously nothing has guarantees it’s just the nature of it but about a year ago I looked for something like this here but had to leave the site to find other avenues for info. I think anytime there is an interaction and sharing of ideas and motivation it brings growth on all parties
Posted
From a D type perspective I was mentored and I’ve also mentored I stopped for the simple reason it just felt like people just wanted the bits that interested them or they saw as helpful not the whole picture. Then your truth that was hard earned became their truth to get the bits they wanted. The difficulty weeding the wheat from the caff is hard and takes up so much time and let’s be honest here in this day any age time is important. A great deal of new people just want the information spoon fed their not prepared to go out and do the groundwork seek out the basic information that’s freely available online now then bring that back and get a more in-depth explanation. They just want the juicy stuff yeah it a sweeping statement but I can only say as I see. When I stated out there wasn’t the info there is now you earned trust then worked for the information so it has value. I really enjoyed mentoring I found it rewarding to pass on what I know but after time the ones that want just juicy bits and want it now become a pointless exercise and a waste of my time.
Posted
I’ve been searching for a mentor for a long time, starting to lose faith in the process
Posted
Anyone who wants a mentor could mention it in their profile, same as someone looking to mentor another. I’d suggest stating exactly what are the minimum requirements you’d accept, such as distance from your location, gender (if that’s important to you), type of bdsm/D/s, whether you are looking for skill development or just ideas, and how much time you think you might need or could offer.

If enough people are interested, it could spread as we recommend the idea to others, who may not fit the brief.

Just my thoughts.
Posted

Always happy to consider assistance or mentoring but the offer is often misunderstood. 

I think this is something rhe mods could look at. 

Posted
52 minutes ago, oldfellow said:

Always happy to consider assistance or mentoring but the offer is often misunderstood. 

I think this is something rhe mods could look at. 

I think they already left it up to us. See the first response.

Posted
2 minutes ago, CopperKnob said:

I guess the issue could also be, some people offering to be mentors who may not be the appropriate people to do so

I think you are right there. I would suggest thst D types mentor D types only, so as to avoid the cases of "selective" mentoring for other purposes. Thoughts people?

Posted
21 minutes ago, TheScribe said:

I think you are right there. I would suggest thst D types mentor D types only, so as to avoid the cases of "selective" mentoring for other purposes. Thoughts people?

I agree in part, however i would say that i would have found it really useful to have had a d type mentoring me as an s type, it would have potentially helped me understand the whats and the whys a little better

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