Inappropriate comments on peoples photos (opinions)

[Just_A_Good_Boy]

First off, yes I am aware this site is for kink and fetishes BUT I often see comments on mostly female photos straight up saying "I want to fuck you" or "love to slap your ass" or more vulgar things of that nature.

For me, even as a guy, I find these odd to say to someone you don't even know (even on a site like this). You could maybe just say nice photo, cute etc or similar.

My question is, what are peoples opinions on this? And for the women, do you like getting comments such as these?

[Deleted Member]

I think there ought to be a setting to disable comments on photos. I have had some sordid comments and no, I don't enjoy them. Anymore than I enjoy total strangers messaging me with similar comments. (strict filters help with that)

[Ma****]

I dont think that women enjoy these comments. They simply lack respect and I think that there isn’t a quicker way to make a Bozo out of yourself than to write a comment such as “i want to fuck you now, text me” or “I’m sure I’d be a great dom for u message me…” Honestly, it is the reason why I tend to stay back from commenting on pics, even tho I like it usually - or even leave a funny comment idk… BUT these comments are something u see very often and imo the mods should give some people timeouts for being complete degenerates.
Thanks for bringing this up, it has been bothering me since I registered on here…

[ey****]

At the risk of being passive....   it's not just photos but on some statuses and walls - and even away from the downright inappropriate, it's a lot of the same names.

I'm not sure if some of the guys in particular realise how counterproductive this is - because as well as being an "ugh - ffs" from many of the women; anyone who might be somewhat interested can see these users have done the same to half the people on the site - which is often a turnoff in itself.

[Ba****]

I agree with you, its cringeworthy behaviour you wouldn't say that to a random lady in the street. I think that's probably more a reflection on them than the site or the life, they seem to think they are safe making comments like that here or even that those comments are wanted. Guess its a good way of knowing who to avoid at all costs

[Just_A_Good_Boy]

3 minutes ago, Marcoo71 said:

I dont think that women enjoy these comments. They simply lack respect and I think that there isn’t a quicker way to make a Bozo out of yourself than to write a comment such as “i want to fuck you now, text me” or “I’m sure I’d be a great dom for u message me…” Honestly, it is the reason why I tend to stay back from commenting on pics, even tho I like it usually - or even leave a funny comment idk… BUT these comments are something u see very often and imo the mods should give some people timeouts for being complete degenerates.
Thanks for bringing this up, it has been bothering me since I registered on here…

Completely agree! I think people feel because of the type of site this is, they can just say anything to anyone and it's okay to do so. Also, no problem with bringing it up, I've seen it often so I figured I'd ask around ^^

[Damon68]

Your right this is a specialist site, but the simple word Respect should still apply. It seems to be missing from the wording and intentions of some of the comments, certain people post. If you don't respect the person you are talking to, how can they trust you.

[Sassi-3310]

As a female who posts pics on here regularly it’s very hard sometimes not to get the odd offensive comment however my experience on here has been fine, I appreciate the levels of respect given. If someone were to post something offensive then yes it would trigger a reaction but I can’t blame people for their reactions to my pics as I am presenting myself in a provocative manner…. I have to take the rough with the smooth. I don’t condone misogyny but I can’t escape it if it happens to me. I’m actually super liberal and so if a guy wants to tell me what he’d like to do to me then that’s fine - it’s their fantasy. If they overstep the mark then I deal with it. And yes not everyone can deal with inappropriate comments it’s a by product unfortunately of being on a site like this, everyone should feel safe and everyone has the right to express themselves - appropriately.

[ge****]

Whilst I don't condone it in any shape or form - I do think it serves as a good filter too - sadly it's the nature of sites like this that some (and let's face it it is mostly men) men lose sight of values such as respect and decency and are blinded by the "sex site" sign and think it gives them a licence to behave inappropriately.

When I first started using another well known adult site about 6 years ago I was shocked at the way some could behave despite being supposed adults who really should know better.

I think partly it comes down to the relative anonymity that the Internet affords, and gives people a licence to say outrageous things to others without *** of reprisal - sadly nor sure there is a great deal that can be done about it other than continually reporting offenders.

[Ar****]

1 hour ago, eyemblacksheep said:

At the risk of being passive....   it's not just photos but on some statuses and walls - and even away from the downright inappropriate, it's a lot of the same names.

I'm not sure if some of the guys in particular realise how counterproductive this is - because as well as being an "ugh - ffs" from many of the women; anyone who might be somewhat interested can see these users have done the same to half the people on the site - which is often a turnoff in itself.

Very much what I was just thinking! How cringe-inducing is it when you scroll down your news feed and literally see every single newly posted photo/group of photos commented on by the the same chap, with the exact same lechy message? Or perhaps the message is an instruction to contact them, or even occasionally one which on the surface seems fairly innocent - until you've scrolled past it for the eighth time in under a minute 🤢

[Deleted Member]

7 minutes ago, Aranhis said:

Very much what I was just thinking! How cringe-inducing is it when you scroll down your news feed and literally see every single newly posted photo/group of photos commented on by the the same chap, with the exact same lechy message? Or perhaps the message is an instruction to contact them, or even occasionally one which on the surface seems fairly innocent - until you've scrolled past it for the eighth time in under a minute 🤢

Nail on the head

[Du****]

Any excessively crass comment on my photos is a guarantee that I will never interact with that person. As you say, yes, it’s a kink site but for goodness’ sake, manners should prevail. Being kinky doesn’t mean one is indiscriminate. I appreciate that you notice and care about this.

[Deleted Member]

Some guys use it as a way to get around filters too - I've had young guys comment on mine before 🙈

[Winston60]

I will often comment on photographs, mainly of womem, but sometimes men. However, when I do, I always try to be complimentary, supportive, chatty, etc. Not only does this seem the polite thing thing to do, but I get quite a few responses and have made good friends this way. When I was first on this site and F'life, I think my comments may have been a bit more direct, but never as crude as the examples you give. It astounds me that people post these frankly, but I assume that doing so is all the social interaction that they are capable of.

[Goober-9862]

Kind of a catch-22.

Images posted publicly are open to all sorts of comments, whether wanted or not.  If certain types of comments are not wanted, should it be on the owner to post only privately?

Does that negate the need for normal human decency or the ability to manage the post, I don't think so, but my behavior is mine and I care how I behave.

But I do think if you are going to post publicly, you need to be prepared for whatever may happen.

[Du****]

6 minutes ago, Goober-9862 said:

Kind of a catch-22.

Images posted publicly are open to all sorts of comments, whether wanted or not.  If certain types of comments are not wanted, should it be on the owner to post only privately?

Does that negate the need for normal human decency or the ability to manage the post, I don't think so, but my behavior is mine and I care how I behave.

But I do think if you are going to post publicly, you need to be prepared for whatever may happen.

It’s just as unwelcome in private as it is in public. It’s perfectly possible to convey appreciation without being disgusting. I love to engage in a bit of filthy talk - but as with anything else, I’ll decide when and with whom.

[Goober-9862]

6 minutes ago, DuchessFeuille said:

It’s just as unwelcome in private as it is in public. It’s perfectly possible to convey appreciation without being disgusting. I love to engage in a bit of filthy talk - but as with anything else, I’ll decide when and with whom.

I don't disagree.  At least private images, should only be accessible to those you see fit to share them with.  Which, probably not always, should help alleviate some of it.

[Goober-9862]

5 minutes ago, Goober-9862 said:

I don't disagree.  At least private images, should only be accessible to those you see fit to share them with.  Which, probably not always, should help alleviate some of it.

And by no means do I believe that absolves the commenter of anything.

Love, kindness and respect I hold dearly, but that is me, not the other idiot ;-)

[Deleted Member]

29 minutes ago, Goober-9862 said:

Kind of a catch-22.

Images posted publicly are open to all sorts of comments, whether wanted or not.  If certain types of comments are not wanted, should it be on the owner to post only privately?

Does that negate the need for normal human decency or the ability to manage the post, I don't think so, but my behavior is mine and I care how I behave.

But I do think if you are going to post publicly, you need to be prepared for whatever may happen.

I don't think posting a public photo means I have to prepare myself for sordid comments. I couldn't disagree more. Bad behaviour is on the person who commits it. Always. It's akin to saying that a woman wearing a short skirt in public is asking for cat calls and ***.

[ge****]

33 minutes ago, Goober-9862 said:

Kind of a catch-22.

Images posted publicly are open to all sorts of comments, whether wanted or not.  If certain types of comments are not wanted, should it be on the owner to post only privately?

Does that negate the need for normal human decency or the ability to manage the post, I don't think so, but my behavior is mine and I care how I behave.

But I do think if you are going to post publicly, you need to be prepared for whatever may happen.

Whilst I can kind of see your logic and acknowledge that nothing can really be done to stop the type of comments referred to, and agree there has to be a level of acceptance that they're likely to happen, there's also a part of me that thinks why should people have "to be prepared for it" - by accepting that kind of behaviour from what after all are grown adults (or supposed to be) is akin to condoning it to a degree.

Now as I said, there really isn't a lot can be done apart from either not posting those pics, only posting them privately (as you suggested) or reporting the worst offenders

I do also think having the option to turn off comments would be a good halfway house at least - and I commend threads like this that highlight the issue, although sadly the kind of person that leaves that kind of comment is unlikely to read this, or if they do, pay attention to it.

Perhaps others commenting on the same pictures calling out comments like that would be a way to go, but that will often descend into nastiness and end up detracting from the site.

So sadly it comes down to having to try and ignore, or educate where possible, neither of which are things that should *have* to be done with grown and supposedly mature adults.

[Deleted Member]

3 hours ago, Sassi-3310 said:

As a female who posts pics on here regularly it’s very hard sometimes not to get the odd offensive comment however my experience on here has been fine, I appreciate the levels of respect given. If someone were to post something offensive then yes it would trigger a reaction but I can’t blame people for their reactions to my pics as I am presenting myself in a provocative manner…. I have to take the rough with the smooth. I don’t condone misogyny but I can’t escape it if it happens to me. I’m actually super liberal and so if a guy wants to tell me what he’d like to do to me then that’s fine - it’s their fantasy. If they overstep the mark then I deal with it. And yes not everyone can deal with inappropriate comments it’s a by product unfortunately of being on a site like this, everyone should feel safe and everyone has the right to express themselves - appropriately.

Why should you have to put up with sordid comments because you've posted a photo? The provocation is in the mind of the viewer. They're not justified in posting comments that show no respect to you. It is their problem. Their fault. You can absolutely blame people for reacting to your photos with sordid comments which you don't consent to. Others choose to react with pleasant comments or react without commenting at all. Nobody who posts photos of any kind on this site deserves these kinds of comments but what a surprise it's men who post them on women's photos. Pure misogyny.

[Goober-9862]

9 minutes ago, Dragonflylover said:

I don't think posting a public photo means I have to prepare myself for sordid comments. I couldn't disagree more. Bad behaviour is on the person who commits it. Always. It's akin to saying that a woman wearing a short skirt in public is asking for cat calls and ***.

I don't disagree. 

Playing devils advocate, if you will.  Does, location and content of the post matter?

I'm willing to bet there is a high percentage, likely of men, here on this site, that want the quick score and think it is cool to be stupid.  I can only hope that percentage drops as they realize, being here is not necessarily everyone's goal.

We cant solve the idiot problem, because they keep being born.  We can ignore, we can block and others suggest, stand up say something, report them etc. 

I'm not saying take it in shorts. 

[Du****]

16 minutes ago, gemini_man said:

Whilst I can kind of see your logic and acknowledge that nothing can really be done to stop the type of comments referred to, and agree there has to be a level of acceptance that they're likely to happen, there's also a part of me that thinks why should people have "to be prepared for it" - by accepting that kind of behaviour from what after all are grown adults (or supposed to be) is akin to condoning it to a degree.

Now as I said, there really isn't a lot can be done apart from either not posting those pics, only posting them privately (as you suggested) or reporting the worst offenders

I do also think having the option to turn off comments would be a good halfway house at least - and I commend threads like this that highlight the issue, although sadly the kind of person that leaves that kind of comment is unlikely to read this, or if they do, pay attention to it.

Perhaps others commenting on the same pictures calling out comments like that would be a way to go, but that will often descend into nastiness and end up detracting from the site.

So sadly it comes down to having to try and ignore, or educate where possible, neither of which are things that should *have* to be done with grown and supposedly mature adults.

Like other situations where women’s* freedom is compromised by men’s* behaviour, it shouldn’t be for the woman to have to modify herself. If men other men being offensive, overbearing, disgusting, unwelcome - call each other out. Perhaps they’ll listen if they realise that EVERYONE thinks they’re a dick…

*not always but usually - you know exactly what I mean 👍

[ge****]

12 minutes ago, DuchessFeuille said:

Like other situations where women’s* freedom is compromised by men’s* behaviour, it shouldn’t be for the woman to have to modify herself. If men other men being offensive, overbearing, disgusting, unwelcome - call each other out. Perhaps they’ll listen if they realise that EVERYONE thinks they’re a dick…

*not always but usually - you know exactly what I mean 👍

Absolutely and agree with everything you've said completely - the *only* people who should have to modify their behaviour are the protagonists themselves - sadly though they tend to be the kind of people who won't ever change or would even listen regardless of who calls them out on it.

Not saying they shouldn't be called out and indeed have done so but they propensity to actually listen and act on what they hear is often minimal at best.

What the answer is I really don't know and despair of the fact I don't.

[AKA_Copper]

It might bother me for maybe a moment but, you can delete comments on you status and pics if they're that vulgar or unwanted so, at a click of a button they're gone