Orgasm during playing?

[Ro****]

Ok, I know it might sounds out of the BDSM universe but not for me. I mean, I can have orgasm during practice, many subs here don't consider BDSM as a sexual side of the relationship, but for my opinion BDSM is also sex. It is so exiting for me to play with my sub so it is normal for me to achieve orgasms, does this happening to you too?

[Sophie58]

Ummmm I Think I’m missing something. BDSM does not mean you don’t have an orgasm! It all depends on what you guys want. For me, I come on demand, so as a submissive, I come many many many many times. And there’s no reason why the Dom should not come to.

It’s up to you and the dynamic you want to experience. I suggest you find what makes you happy and pursue that kink. There are no rules except to be safe, consensual and have fun.

[BadDesires]

BDSM and sex are both independent activities but there is scope for them to overlap. There are plenty of interesting aspects outside the overlap worth exploring in you relationships. Being able to separate the 2 should allow you to form much deeper connections with your partner as you will have a much greater understanding of what they like and enjoy.

[ey****]

different people enjoy kink in different ways.  

For some having an orgasm is vital.  For some not having one is preferred. 

Some are.... down to the context. Whether it's nice, but not important - desirable but no harm if there's not one.

Just so long as folk are on the same page.

--

Of course, there's not necessarily a requirement for the orgasm to be pleasant for the submissive But then that's also it's own thing

[ge****]

Whilst I understand the logic that separates BDSM and sex for some, for me BDSM is just a part of someone's sexuality and a means of heightening that sexuality, so there are definite links between the two and as such orgasm or even orgasm denial are both very much a part of it.

Of course how each individual dynamic and scene plays out and is defined is down to the individuals involved in it and as such there is no right or wrong when it comes to orgasms, only what people choose for themselves.

[Ro****]

On 11/24/2021 at 5:00 AM, Sophie58 said:

Ummmm I Think I’m missing something. BDSM does not mean you don’t have an orgasm! It all depends on what you guys want. For me, I come on demand, so as a submissive, I come many many many many times. And there’s no reason why the Dom should not come to.

It’s up to you and the dynamic you want to experience. I suggest you find what makes you happy and pursue that kink. There are no rules except to be safe, consensual and have fun.

understand, thanks for your answer I really appreciate it

[Ro****]

On 11/24/2021 at 5:00 AM, Sophie58 said:

Ummmm I Think I’m missing something. BDSM does not mean you don’t have an orgasm! It all depends on what you guys want. For me, I come on demand, so as a submissive, I come many many many many times. And there’s no reason why the Dom should not come to.

It’s up to you and the dynamic you want to experience. I suggest you find what makes you happy and pursue that kink. There are no rules except to be safe, consensual and have fun.

do you know what? some peoples that introduce themselves as "sub" even here in this community want to absolutely separate sex from BDSM and follow some restrict and specific rules written by them... ok so please, BDSM is a serious passion, a very important way to explore ourselves together so please, they should carefully think about joining a community like this one

[ge****]

9 minutes ago, RoyalNight said:

do you know what? some peoples that introduce themselves as "sub" even here in this community want to absolutely separate sex from BDSM and follow some restrict and specific rules written by them... ok so please, BDSM is a serious passion, a very important way to explore ourselves together so please, they should carefully think about joining a community like this one

But why should they? They're as entitled to the way *they* choose to define *their* BDSM as *you* are to define *yours* - just because their way is different doesn't mean they're in the wrong, they're just not compatible with you.

It also doesn't matter whether they are dominant or submissive - their bodies, their rules - you either accept them, or at least find a compromise, or move on to someone who matches better.

[CopperKnob]

8 hours ago, RoyalNight said:

do you know what? some peoples that introduce themselves as "sub" even here in this community want to absolutely separate sex from BDSM and follow some restrict and specific rules written by them... ok so please, BDSM is a serious passion, a very important way to explore ourselves together so please, they should carefully think about joining a community like this one

Whys that? What type of community do you believe this to be?

[ey****]

Everybody, regardless of gender, role, honorific, etc. has their own boundaries and what works for them.

Some of this might be general "I do not want sex during a BDSM scene"

Some might be specific "I do not want sex with you during a BDSM scene"

Consent and healthy boundaries are very important in the community....... 

[Sophie58]

Thursday at 03:06 PM, RoyalNight said:

do you know what? some peoples that introduce themselves as "sub" even here in this community want to absolutely separate sex from BDSM and follow some restrict and specific rules written by them... ok so please, BDSM is a serious passion, a very important way to explore ourselves together so please, they should carefully think about joining a community like this one

Hah! I just noticed this gentle poke at me. That’s fun. So, for me BDSM, in its fullest expression is a true exchange of body mind and spirit between two people. At that end, it becomes more organic and utterly sublime. But getting there takes a ton of self discovery, emotional maturity and absolute trust between both the D and the s. Having strong rules can be very helpful in that journey, so please, do you. And for me, except for safety and consent, what BDSM is not, is pedantic. Fortunately, this community is for all who enjoy kink, so I guess I’ll stay. 😊

[Jimmmy]

Interesting topic. For me, orgasm during a play session, especially if I’m being penetrated, organically or synthetically, is not essential. Sometimes I can gain an even greater sense of pleasure, achievement, fulfilment and satisfaction even though I haven’t reached climax. It depends upon my playmate, the dynamic between us and numerous other factors. I’ve had the most pleasurable and fulfilling experiences when I haven’t climaxed, and I’ve had some completely forgettable experiences when I have! It’s all about the situation, the vibe and the commonality of the experience. Not all orgasms are great, remember… Better a great experience with no orgasm than a lousy one with climax…

[RosesHaveThorns75]

Why have ALL these posts about having empowerment & safety & inclusion only trying to educate us NOW to come out with a statement on here that it's wrong to want to or NEED to separate sex from Bdsm & how so what those peeps aren't welcome or what?!? Are downgraded somehow......?? What about peeps with *strong religious convictions *peeps who already have a sexual partner who'd be cheating  *peeps who may have Medical issues who may find Bdsm enough to cope with without something sexual on top which could be triggering?!? 💀☹️💀 being *transgender or *transexual & transition going on may have lower body or whole body off limits!!!!! You've just implied that some of the most vunrible sections of society DONT according to you have +BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS+ to decide what does/doesn't happen to their body's!!! It also implys you beleive in braking the Law or segregation for those who want to separate their sexuality/Bdsm from actual sexual acts?!?  Read the human rights Act 1998 which is part of the  MOST BASIC LAWS in the UK!!! And is an extension of the European court of Human rights act also!!  🔥💀🔥 *I have a right to freedom of expression-Article No 10 *right to choose my religion-Article No 9 and *freedom from *** or degrading & inhumane treatment-Article No 3!!!! Freedom from human slavery & ***d labours Article No 4 among others! So If I have a CONSENT RIGHT during Bdsm whatever as this site actively promotes then I say that includes my sexual body-parts which +NEWSFLASH+ were given to me by a God/Goddess as I'm religious inclined and therefore under my domain & control & not yours!!! The Law also considers my body to be mine/my property & non consentual sexual acts as assault!! You don't want peeps who are legally adults btw) even if impaired or not to make serious life decisions for themselves because you want to make it for them it sounds like?!? For Impaired adults/Disabilitys there are large sections of additional rights/Articles given by Law (pages & pages) for those who study it given by the human rights act to PROTECT & Not less as your implying it's all down to your personal opinions!!!! I just feel disqusted 💀😬💀 like there isn't enough +Social Pressures+ on peeps already without this eXtra expectation!!! Seriously Wtf?!?

 

 

 

Edited November 28, 2021 by Rock21RosesAndRopes
Need to add the Article nos/Hra

[Th****]

Roseshavethorns - I totally support everything you said regarding there being total diversity, neuro diversity and inclusion within the BDSM lifestyle.

This is only a legal point, you cannot give up your human rights under UK law even if you consent to it.

Don't get me wrong you can totally consent to having a whipping, for example. It just doesn't stop it being assault in the eyes of the law in the UK.

Okay I am done, and you totally have the right to consent or not to anything you want.

[Sa****]

I am sorry but as a human being I have the right to decide with my Dominant what we do in a scene. To be honest we all got into BDSM because we enjoy what “society” see as being out of the box. I have noticed more and more people are trying to be “gatekeeper’s”. I have a little side and it is different then some of the others and I have actually been told I am doing it wrong🤣. I have heard others say if you don’t do A, B or C you are not a real sub. There is not a right or wrong way to play in any dynamic, it is the choice of the people in that dynamic. This is why we have safe words, hard limits and soft limits because what one person thinks of as crazy the next person loves it. As long as people understand that shit will happen and there are risks we take but we understand it and accepted it. We are in this community so we can openly talk about things that most of Society will not understand. As long as there is consent you do you.

[Th****]

On 11/23/2021 at 10:06 PM, RoyalNight said:

Ok, I know it might sounds out of the BDSM universe but not for me. I mean, I can have orgasm during practice, many subs here don't consider BDSM as a sexual side of the relationship, but for my opinion BDSM is also sex. It is so exiting for me to play with my sub so it is normal for me to achieve orgasms, does this happening to you too?

BDSM its self is not a kink but has kinks within it....Bondage, Domination, Sadism and Masochism. each of the Sub headings of BDSM, have a wide verity of further sub headings, and so on and so on, its not all about having sex, its about doing things you enjoy with a partner, if that includes sex then thats fine, if it dose thats fine too.

This is more about finding a compatible partner, theres no use in perusing a partnership when one of the people dose not want sex and the other dose. This is individual choice as are many thing in BDSM.

Like you working and playing with a partner turns me on, massively, so like you I need a partner that is also sexually active, as sex is part of what I am looking for from a partner. If what you do with your partner excites you to the point of auto climax then thats fine and healthy, you sound like your having fun which is what BDSM is about. 

[Th****]

5 hours ago, Sara-Secrets said:

I am sorry but as a human being I have the right to decide with my Dominant what we do in a scene. To be honest we all got into BDSM because we enjoy what “society” see as being out of the box. I have noticed more and more people are trying to be “gatekeeper’s”. I have a little side and it is different then some of the others and I have actually been told I am doing it wrong🤣. I have heard others say if you don’t do A, B or C you are not a real sub. There is not a right or wrong way to play in any dynamic, it is the choice of the people in that dynamic. This is why we have safe words, hard limits and soft limits because what one person thinks of as crazy the next person loves it. As long as people understand that shit will happen and there are risks we take but we understand it and accepted it. We are in this community so we can openly talk about things that most of Society will not understand. As long as there is consent you do you.

Yes but you get away with *** anyway because I am your Dominant, 🤣
I am happy as long as I can do you to 😜