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Sub qualities


jo****

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Posted
Sweet, friendly, kind, bubbly, relaxed, happy. I look for this in general, with a girl.
Posted
Someone with a bit of sass, someone who'll give me a challenge, I enjoy challenges so much
Posted
Almost ott communication
Respect
Flexibility
Interest
Self worth (both in vanilla and fetish though during play it may differ)
Humour
Understanding
Innocence (sometimes not 24/7 obviously)
Caring
Trust
An element of masochism
A liking of feeling helpless

And off course Submission tends to be quite a big requirement lol
Posted
Ah also! from the opposite angle, some things I avoid - negativity, rudeness, lack of tact, lack of sense of humour / easy offence / looking for offence.
Example of an unappealing (usually bypassed) profile, in my view:
Has blunt warnings/demands/advice to people who might message a girl - "do not message me if x, y, z", "do not talk to me in x, y, z way", "I am not a doormat", "don't be boring". This kind of sub's profile announces to me a high maintenance headche / difficult person, along with arrogance - as a person with so many demands etc had better be perfect and highly charming themselves - which no one is. Such things can still be said in a profile, but require some grace, sweetness etc - because I'm not into having a relationship with grumpy huffy tactless girls, least of all a sub. Not sexy or even plessant/charming, to me.
The people I end up having interactions / relationships with, whatever their nature - they are all positive, relaxed people.
Thx for the chance to say this, it's been nice to express it!
If you're a sub, I think you'll make a lovely one, based on the fact you've asked the kinda question that you've posted here :) 😉🙏
Posted

I think - there could be different angles in whether they wanted to be my sub, or some form of play partner.

I have shy'd slightly away from taking on a sub as I am concerned I couldn't quite offer the time they wanted - but - then, I might be wrong as folk are different.

Certainly someone who has the independence to not need constant time. Someone who might be open minded to new ideas, but good at communicating about what does and doesn't work for them.

Speaking of communication, depending on the nature of the relationship I would certainly want someone with some mutual interests - either so we can spend social time together, or, something where having a conversation is easy.

I don't dislike brats, but, similarly, lack the energy for playing-up for attention 

I would also work better with someone who knows their self worth; likes to give up control and submit because they enjoy it.

Posted
Obedience, very submissive, care for her Dom and respect, very little brattiness not big into brats but some sass is good. Sexual. The more of all of this the better. Kinky, openness to try new things, trust. Physical attraction, emotional connection, and control. Most of the time it’s all compatibility, we’re all a different mix/ratio of both sides.
Posted

Communication and honesty. 

Everything else can be worked out after that. That might mean you don't end up with a sub but maybe you make a friend.

Posted
Trust, honesty, communication, and loyalty. You must be able to fully trust that the other person has your best interest at heart, as well as their own. Honesty? I mean, c’mon! We’re all adults here. To be honest, is to be vulnerable. I want to hear it ALL from my sub. Every. Single. Detail. Let’s get down to the nitty gritty and figure out how to make it mutually beneficial. Not just for one. Both. Communication is the key to making any relationship work, romantic or not. There is not one person who can use the excuse “Oh, I’m too busy.” No, you’re choosing to prioritize your own wants or desires over someone else’s. Again, it has to be a two way street. Communication to me is like what breath is to life. I have to have it in order to keep a connection alive. Loyalty to me runs deep. It is not defined by friendship or blood. It is something that is freely given to someone else over a period of time. It cannot be rushed or forced. When you can feel it, you will know.
Posted
Great question as so many Doms vary. I find the real ones tend to adapt to the subs needs while also satisfying their own. Obviously not always the case as some may require more demands from a sub.
Posted
I look for a woman who's just a good person. If she's a good, honest, kind-hearted person, everything else can fall into place naturally. This to me is the foundation of a good sub💖
Posted
I missed half a comment there- I believe if the Dom treats the sub like a human being and tries to get to know them as a person first, it builds for a stronger foundation and with this I believe the sub will trust and perhaps commit more to things they may not have been willing to do out of fear for safety. That’s just what I’ve found when looking for a Dom and I have found Doms receptive when openly honest during communications and how I feel!
Posted
A friend, first and foremost. There has to be a connection of some kind for me.
Posted
Connection and a willingness to grow with me as a person.

In a dynamic I hope for good communication and appreciation on both sides. Due to my rarer niches, people sometimes act like I might be something of a kink dispenser for them, but I want more than that from a relationship - bringing us right back to my first sentence x
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