Wife confessed she's switch Dominatrix

[Deleted Member]

Life takes it turns its important to steer the right way. My wife confessed to me she is a switch. She wants to dominate me. It just doesn't work with me. She has all these fantasies I can't fulfill. We tried. I want my pet be happy so I've decided to let my sex slave have some fun. My bitch will be on a long leash.

I've tried roleplay, playing a sub for her and it just doesn't do anything for me. I don't stay hard. I don't cum. I'm not a switch. The thought of submission makes me sick to my stomach. When we roleplay I always lose patience and end up fucking her.

I will be watching every session. Ensuring my baby is safe

[Je****]

Argh. Im sorry reading this i have criticism (anyone who knows me know im not like this *yes i am*)

 

Ok so its great she is finding herself. Absolutely amazing 

And its absolutely amazing that you are giving her "a long leash". Thats all really great. 

 

But i read it in two ways. 

 

You arent turned on as its not for you. Ok fine.

But the fact that your woman is leading, having fun and doing what she loves and whats turning her on... 

Should that not be a focus on you to think about?

It reads to me... youre not into it because YOU cant stay hard or whatever else.

Can you maybe think of HER and what shes doing and focus on how amazing its making her feel? Getting your arousal from HER not the act of submission?

 

I guess for me i do things for my partner that turn them on. It doesnt make me gush... doing said things.

But what does... is seeing their reaction. How happy and turned on they are!! How theyre enjoying themselves and knowing *I* am giving them the pleasure. 

Its not all about me...

Its the same with them doing things they know i want or like.

They dont be rock hard all the time. But they know some things make me happy and their pleasure comes from mine.

Thats, to me, what a relationship and dynamic is about. Happiness and seeing your partner happy. 

 

Maybe think of her instead of yourself.. thats all i can say. But i am a switch and i am aware we are very different people.

 

But the one thing that irked me was perhaps your poor wording... 

 

"" The thought of submission makes me sick to my stomach. ""

I find this a very narrowing and disrespectful comment.

How you are ok with someone else doing this "sick to the stomach" act for you. It sounds like youre belittling a submissive role. When realistically the sub is the one who weilds the true power in any dynamic. Not... the dominant. 

 

And to get fed up and lose patience and end up fucking her. I also see this as disrespecting her growth. Taking her progress away from her for your own sexual gain. 

 

Thats just how this paragraph reads to me.

Maybe its just as well she has a long leash as you call it.

I dont think she can grow and discover herself at the helm with you in this way.

 

Maybe try giving her a bit if time and patience and put her first. Not your own cock. But im glad shes opened up about how she feels. Shows credit she can approach you. 

[Ch****]

I totally understand, from the other side, im sub only and if my partner asked me to switch then it would probably end the relationship.
I make this very clear at the start, i get people change but its just not in me to switch sides.
She is a lucky lady to have you understand and given it your best shot but its not for you by the sounds of it, im glad you have both found a way around it 😊

[fallenoff]

Finally....what a wonderous post/reply.  Grinning from ear to ear

[RosineK]

Yesterday at 10:00 AM, Finally_Jen said:

Argh. Im sorry reading this i have criticism (anyone who knows me know im not like this *yes i am*)

 

Ok so its great she is finding herself. Absolutely amazing 

And its absolutely amazing that you are giving her "a long leash". Thats all really great. 

 

But i read it in two ways. 

 

You arent turned on as its not for you. Ok fine.

But the fact that your woman is leading, having fun and doing what she loves and whats turning her on... 

Should that not be a focus on you to think about?

It reads to me... youre not into it because YOU cant stay hard or whatever else.

Can you maybe think of HER and what shes doing and focus on how amazing its making her feel? Getting your arousal from HER not the act of submission?

 

I guess for me i do things for my partner that turn them on. It doesnt make me gush... doing said things.

But what does... is seeing their reaction. How happy and turned on they are!! How theyre enjoying themselves and knowing *I* am giving them the pleasure. 

Its not all about me...

Its the same with them doing things they know i want or like.

They dont be rock hard all the time. But they know some things make me happy and their pleasure comes from mine.

Thats, to me, what a relationship and dynamic is about. Happiness and seeing your partner happy. 

 

Maybe think of her instead of yourself.. thats all i can say. But i am a switch and i am aware we are very different people.

 

But the one thing that irked me was perhaps your poor wording... 

 

"" The thought of submission makes me sick to my stomach. ""

I find this a very narrowing and disrespectful comment.

How you are ok with someone else doing this "sick to the stomach" act for you. It sounds like youre belittling a submissive role. When realistically the sub is the one who weilds the true power in any dynamic. Not... the dominant. 

 

And to get fed up and lose patience and end up fucking her. I also see this as disrespecting her growth. Taking her progress away from her for your own sexual gain. 

 

Thats just how this paragraph reads to me.

Maybe its just as well she has a long leash as you call it.

I dont think she can grow and discover herself at the helm with you in this way.

 

Maybe try giving her a bit if time and patience and put her first. Not your own cock. But im glad shes opened up about how she feels. Shows credit she can approach you. 

Exactly what I thought 💯

[ey****]

there's a few bits in both the post and some comments I feel should be balanced.

So my first thought is that whatever we're into, and of course we want the best for our partners and their happiness, there are things that just don't work for us.

It sounds like the OP has tried - but - it just doesn't work and the best thing is for his partner to explore these with someone who genuinely enjoys it.

So sometimes "go play with others - come home to me" *is* doing the best for partners happiness and wants.

However; I'd be apprehensive on watching sessions unless you have a reason to be involved - it's not fair on your wife (who may feel like she is being judged/monitored or may feel limited in what she can do), the submissive (who would lack their own privacy) or yourself (any form of jealousy you may feel seeing her enjoy something that you won't do for her - or where there is a crossover on what you would : for example, any form of worship)

When I say reason; if it is a scenario where someone will submit to you as a couple (but remember this has to mostly benefit your wife) or if say you are helping with filming - I have done scenes where someone's partner is behind the camera, my wife has also filmed me doing stuff with others (and the other way round) but this was all folk knowing what they'd be witnessing and into.