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Posted
Hi. I was wondering how to make myself stand out.

I feel like I just blend in with every other guy looking for love.

I appreciate your help

Thank You
Posted
I don't believe I stand out in any way but I've met some great people over the years (new here but active online for a long time) I just be myself, be honest about my intentions and desires and try to message people who I match what they're looking for.
Pick out something that interests you about their profile and build your first message around that, pay attention to what they've said about themselves and why they are here
Obviously if you do all this and it's fake you'll be found out it has to be genuine so if you're not the type of person that does these things naturally then maybe try something else
Posted
If we knew how to stand out we would do it for ourselves, you know how everyone is Greedy Now
Posted
I feel you man and good luck to you 💯
Posted
How do you make yourself stand out? First and foremost by being genuinely and authentically you, being open and honest, respectful and courteous and having your expectations, attitude and approach set right.
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Beyond that, to an extent you have to accept you're one of many, many fish in a huge ocean all looking for the same (or at least similar) thing.
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Now that said, it's important you know and understand what that thing you're looking for actually is - if you don't know, how can you expect to find it? And once you do know you need to be able to express that through your profile and any interactions you have on the site.
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Having looked at your profile, being honest, it does nothing to show you know what you're looking for or even understand this world and that is very likely the largest single reason you're "blending in" as you suggest i.e. you look like just about every other guy who's joined the site thinking that's all it takes to meet people and experience kink.
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So make yourself stand out by finding ways to make yourself stand out is what it comes to and most of that needs to come from within - in terms of your profile, your pics and your interactions.
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Posted

The best way to stand out is the same for both online and in person.

Be seen. Be visible.

What I mean by this. So online, contribute to the forum and posts. Possibly partake in the chat.  So on.   In real life, attend munches and events. Socialise.  Turn up regularly.

This has you stand out already because people can see you, your contributions, your personality, so on.  Of course some won't like it. And, of course, someone could totally LIKE you, but not want to play with you or whatever.  But certainly it is more chance to get you noticed.

Obviously of course - this COULD get you noticed for being a resident pain in the ass. OR could get you noticed as someone who is keen to learn.  It COULD get you noticed as a nice person to be around, OR could get you noticed as someone who is hard work.   So, that's all kinda on you :) 

Posted
Be yourself… the thing is, not every guy is like every guy. If you a geek OWN IT, if your smart OWN IT, I felt like I blended in for years and found out that actually I’m not like every other guy, I’m me! It took me 15 years to understand that. So start write down things you like, things you enjoy and start putting them in your profile or talking about it!

Heck, I like writing short stories and have an odd sense of humour, I wrote one after seeing Miss Piggy and Kermit in bondage gear. Another I wrote about a Star Wars Roleplay where Darth Vader is being tortured by Princess Leia, where she put sand down his pants.

Those are ODD combinations but it’s unique to me.

Have fun being you! The love will come next! Because someone will find the unique things about you, Are perfect for the unique things about them.
Posted

Be upfront honesty truthful
Leap of faith who you really are
Don't hold back

Posted
The best advice I can give you is grow some mutton chops start rocking out a fohawk and modernize those glasses. potentially grown chin hair maybe a mojo patch
Posted
I do think the above advice is true. However, over things have an impact. Initial visuals have a huge impact. Especially on a site like this. But just look at the research done on tinder. Male to female “swipes” are 1000 to 1. Females just get more attention from men then the other way around regardless of initial visuals. Sure there are guys that only want a Barbie, and girls that only want a Ken. The research shows that men have a much higher acceptance rate then women.

So yeah own who you are but broadcast your best qualities and I bet you will get noticed.
Posted
Show people who you are. Take a look at the profikes of the people commenting here. I bet that each of them give at least an indication of who they are as an individual and what they're looking for.
If you have nothing going on in your life (and we all do) work on yourself, develop your character both in and outside of kink. Figure out who you are.
Your profile tells me your age, location and...nothing else.
You need to be active like Eyem says in the forums, chat rooms and in real life. That gives people an insight into your views and character.
Like Gemini says, be authentic and genuine. Don't copy what others have put on their profile. We know that for most people a limit will be anything that's illegal and yet I see it time and time again on profiles, often as the only limit.
Step up and make the effort, there's nothing more really to do other than that
Posted
Just get out there and explore. Ms.Frizzle said it best, take chances, make mistakes, and get messy. By doing that, you'll learn yourself, find out your best qualities and grow.
Posted
1. Be you.

2. Be the most confident you you can be.
Posted
It may take awhile and editing as you grow and change but your profile should let people in to allow them to get to know you as a person. Kink/fetish is only a part of who you are. Most genuinely looking want to know what makes you uniquely you.
Posted
Give a genuine version of who you are and what you need. I just took my own advice and went in to update my own profile as it was woefully outdated.
Posted
Update profile page and images and just trying to be yourself
Posted
Be mindful, surround yourself with trusted friends
Posted
OP to use an example from your own history about how you missed an opportunity to make yourself stand out - a few weeks back you started a thread about anal play - lots of people gave some very good advice on that thread - yet apart from starting the thread it doesn't appear you've returned to it since.
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Whilst it wouldn't necessarily lead to anything, there was an opportunity there to interact with others on the forum and make yourself stand out, albeit just a little.
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Are you going to do the same with this thread where you've asked for advice.
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Another area I mentioned in my last post, where you can make yourself stand out is in your profile - I've just taken a look at yours, and whilst I'm not going to tell you what to write, as it stands I'm not surprised you don't stand out!! It tells us nothing about you the person at all - you state you're submissive, so tell us what kind of submissive you think you are and what kind of dominant you'd like to meet.
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All the FET questions have been answered with a minimal of effort, put some real thought into them and expand on your answers.
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As it stands it tells us very little, but also tells anyone viewing it all they need to know.
Posted
A really good photo will help. Doesn't have to be mean and Moody. Can be Smiling.
I like Profiles that have alot in the description, that gives me a picture or a feel of what that person is like.
Why they re here.
Im one that generally reads all the Profile, but the photo is what we all see first .
Good Luck
Posted
I really wish I knew the answer to this. I feel invisible.
Posted
3 hours ago, jasonwratislaw said:
I really wish I knew the answer to this. I feel invisible.

So make yourself visible - which I know sounds the obvious answer, but think about how you can make yourself more visible - there's some good advice in this thread already about appealing profiles and getting involved in the forums and chat rooms here, or getting along to local munches and kink events.
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Being honest having read your profile, whilst there are a lot of words, apart from a few things, they really don't tell a reader much other than you want to meet someone without much messaging, your limits (most of which are givens for most) and your very sad current situation, which in itself may be a deterrent to some.
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Apologies if that sounds brutal, it's not intended to be, is honest and constructive feedback.
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I'd also say you've only been here 25 days, which is not time at all on sites like this, which generally take time and patience to find what you hope to find. I've been here nearly 18 months now and haven't met a single person, but that doesn't bother me in the slightest as I'd rather wait and find the right person than just any person.

Nacho-2589
Posted
4 hours ago, jasonwratislaw said:

I really wish I knew the answer to this. I feel invisible.

It’s a start!! I haven’t been here long at all. What I can say is that jumping into chats and introducing myself in forums has gone well. Sure sometimes it feels difficult. But nothing ventured nothing gained!! I was welcomed here far more readily than in some other online spaces. Overall people have been nice! Oh and very helpful. I don’t think anyone is here to be unkind just for the sake of it!

Posted
Hit the gym! Its not so much about being superhuman strong, just be a regular and stay active. It worked for me, I was just too dumb to see it, so … man, its a long story but the gym is a biggier meat market thanthe bars. Good luck
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