Am I right to be outraged?

[Deleted Member]

Polyamory, polygamy, and ethical non-monogamy are conflated with each other all the time. This problem comes up quite often. We need to be aware of and understand the differences I think.

Polyamory is one type of relationship style that falls under the umbrella of ethical non-monogamy. So, all polyamory is ethical non-monogamy, but not all ethical non-monogamy is polyamory. Polyamory specifically refers to multiple loving relationships, whereas ethical non-monogamy is any arrangement where people have multiple consensual romantic, sexual, and/or intimate connections.

The reason why people specify their non-monogamy is “ethical” is to distinguish from cases where people go behind their partner’s backs and lie about having other partners, i.e. cheating. Ethical non-monogamy (often shortened to ENM) is ethical because everyone knows what is going on and consents to the arrangement. Polyamory is one type of relationship style that falls under the umbrella of ethical non-monogamy. So, all polyamory is ethical non-monogamy, but not all ethical non-monogamy is polyamory. Polyamory specifically refers to multiple loving relationships, whereas ethical non-monogamy is any arrangement where people have multiple consensual romantic, sexual, and/or intimate connections.

The reason why people specify their non-monogamy is “ethical” is to distinguish from cases where people go behind their partner’s backs and lie about having other partners, i.e. cheating. Ethical non-monogamy (often shortened to ENM) is ethical because everyone knows what is going on and consents to the arrangement. You might also see the term consensual non-monogamy (CNM), which is basically another way to refer to the same type of practices, but is less commonly used in everyday s***ch.

Although let’s be honest. Who needs more boxes 📦📦📦

[Chloebear]

Absolutely @naughtynat, at the end of the day it’s about respecting people’s choices (ie consent I’d say) and open and honest communication.

[Ae****]

Be outraged if you have a lot of spare time and nothing better to do. Think about it, complain, tell others.
If you're busy, have a life, have friends, are happy - be tolerating, don't worry what other people think or do, accept that they have different views and may be rude, don't take it personally and forget about it immediately. Move on.

[angelbrite77]

You were honest n she was honest
I don't see what the issue is really
it really doesn't matter what her value judgment is on the way You live Your life

[MasterDarcy1979]

You're being a wee bit sensitive.

If she said that she can't morally be with someone like you, she probably meant that her conscious wouldn't allow her to be with another woman's man.

It's not about you.

If she was willing to be friends with you and be platonic then it's obvious that she likes you as a person.

Personally, I'm into watersports. It's a niche fetish and I've had my fair share of subs calling it "gross", etc.

I didn't for one moment think that they thought that I was gross.

I respected them for being honest. As you should do with this woman.

Maybe it's a self esteem issue?

I have high self esteem, that's most likely why I didn't think the aforementioned subs weren't calling me gross. But really, I don't think they were.

Were they kink shaming? Yes. But remember what Eleanor Roosevelt said ~ “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

That's actually a lesson that society should learn as it doesn't take very much to offend people these days.