Re**** Posted September 16, 2019 Posted September 16, 2019 So, I'm a newbie (6 months) in a 24/7 D/s relationship. Until recently I identified as a bratty sub meaning I sub but brat too. After doing some more reading I think I am more SAM. My question is, are they that different or one and the same? What do the more experienced consider the fundamental differences, if any? Thanks guys.
Kay- Posted September 16, 2019 Posted September 16, 2019 What is a SAM not come across that before and they're different from a bratty sub meaning what exactly?
ey**** Posted September 16, 2019 Posted September 16, 2019 SAM is Smart Arsed Masochist. There are differences - but - in some ways, don't be too hung up. So the sub comes first in a bratty sub meaning they are often playful and cheeky. A brat might not be deliberately defiant. But a SAM would be. The SAM would deliberately push the and deft the Dominant in order to get/gain a worse or severe punishment - effectively provoke a sadist to, ultimately, satisfy their masochism.
Re**** Posted September 17, 2019 Author Posted September 17, 2019 13 hours ago, eyemblacksheep said: SAM is Smart Arsed Masochist. There are differences - but - in some ways, don't be too hung up. So a brat is often playful and cheeky. A brat might not be deliberately defiant. But a SAM would be. The SAM would deliberately push the and deft the Dominant in order to get/gain a worse or severe punishment - effectively provoke a sadist to, ultimately, satisfy their masochism. Thank you, I am definitely more SAM, the masochist in me most certainly drives my defiant behaviour, that and being so strong willed/minded I have an inner inate desire to push things to the limit to test myself and D, physically, mentally and emotionally.
Re**** Posted September 18, 2019 Author Posted September 18, 2019 14 minutes ago, DaisyMae said: You don't need to try and fit in a box - you can be any type of sub you want and don't need to fit in one specific category. Don't worry about labelling your sub style - just enjoy your journey and exploration Wise words, thank you 😊
Deleted Member Posted September 22, 2019 Posted September 22, 2019 Is there something in a Bratty sub meaning they are not necessarily masochist? If you push your Dom to get physically punished it’s reversed control and kind of feeding ***. Interesting psychology there
Re**** Posted September 24, 2019 Author Posted September 24, 2019 On 9/22/2019 at 3:59 PM, FabSeverus said: Brat are not necessarily masochist? If you push your Dom to get physically punished it’s reversed control and kind of feeding ***. Interesting psychology there He's not just my D, he is also my husband. We are more than happy with how things are. My question was do people view them as very different entities, the term Brat is heard on pretty much a daily basis, the same can not be said for the term SAM. I'm not hung up on titles, I was curious to others thoughts.
ey**** Posted September 24, 2019 Posted September 24, 2019 On 9/24/2019 at 5:58 PM, Remounters said: My question was do people view them as very different entities, the term Brat is heard on pretty much a daily basis, the same can not be said for the term SAM. I'm not hung up on titles, I was curious to others thoughts. I think.... we often go for simpler 'catch all' terms. So, there are similarities between brats, SAMs and 'break mes' but also quite different on desired end results. But, a lot get lumped under brat for ease. But we do this with other terms also - we call people subs who might be masochists or bottoms - we call people Dominants who might be Tops or Sadists - I'm not sure if we over simplify things sometimes. Maybe we combine some and get bratty sub meaning one thing to one person and something else to another. but then sometimes, people see "you're not a Dom you're a top, not a sub you're a bottom, not a brat you're a SAM" as potential insults.
Mistress_Rebeca Posted September 30, 2019 Posted September 30, 2019 Hi everybody, I think a bratty sub meaning is in the facr they are trying to behave, but his/her cheeky, untamed nature makes him/her behaving not in an expected way, so they got punished, but they will be sorry for that misbehavior. Buuuut - once I have found a nice book, written by a well-popular bdsm writer, who said brats look only after themselves. From the other side a SAM, a masochist who pushes D's limits, is nothing new. All the subs will somehow test those limits, in more or less aggressive way. In different countries some definitions may vary, because actually everybody has its own definition. In my humble opinion it is not a question of definitions, but rather feelings. Topping from the bottom, trying to control a Dom and whole the situation, thinking only about his/her pleasure makes a "submissive" actually a dominant. But if a sub is not behaving well, mostly it is a Dom's problem. Just imagine a high-performance horse, prepared for the most difficult horse racings. Many people can ride a horse, but very little will be able to ride a horse like that and still enjoy the ride. So a high compatibility between D and s helps both to thrive and to really feel at their place. SAM is no better then brat and brat is no better then an obedient slave. They are only different. Kink is all about differences and joy of being what we really are, no matter how you can name it.
Re**** Posted October 4, 2019 Author Posted October 4, 2019 Kink is all about differences and joy of being what we really are, no matter how you can name it. Amen to that statement.
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