What am i missing?

[Hexy]

After being "on the market" for that special someone i feel like i've only ever been seen as a possible fling by others, be it that someone is bored and wants some attention for a bit or sleeping behind their GF/ Wifes back and always after finding this out i nothing but hurt.

Is it me? Do i aim too high?

I have so many questions because i just cant find my Mr. Right, my Sir/Owner/Master, other half to my heart.

I dont know what i am doing wrong and i am starting to get into a slump over it. Am i just too broken for anyone to want to try? Am i just not attractive? Am i too old?

[CuriousSissy]

I know the feeling. There is someone out there, just be patient x

[Deleted Member]

Stay true to yourself as perfect as you are.If others do not see that they are not worthy of you.

[ey****]

chances are this isn't down to anything you have or haven't done - a lot is a bit of a landmine especially online and the era where people (in this case, probably, others) want instant results.  "Oh, I've an evening spare, can I find a quick hook up", "Wife is in bed - can I find someone online to talk to me about my fantasies so I can have a quick wank"

I guess some questions are, for example, how long have you been looking?

and, also, where have you been looking?  Online only, or have you ventured into local events and meets?

[Deleted Member]

There is more than one type of person on this website. Some want quick flings, while others are after something more substantial and long term. I myself have had the misfortune of talking to women who will talk to me for a while; we'll hit it off with a great conversation, and then they'll block me with no warning or explanation. All I can say is hang in there. Make sure that your profile states exactly what you want, and then stop trying so hard to find the right person. Enjoy yourself, make friends, talk to people, and when the right person comes along, you'll know.

[Mi****]

From my own experience all my long term friends and my partner have been met face to face rather than online. Im a great believer in joining the locl communities and frequenting munches and events to meet like minded people

[TouchMeDxddy]

I’m sure you’ll meet someone right soon:((( you seem very lovely so it won’t take too long, just hold on, keep trying and don’t give up!

[Hexy]

3 hours ago, eyemblacksheep said:

chances are this isn't down to anything you have or haven't done - a lot is a bit of a landmine especially online and the era where people (in this case, probably, others) want instant results.  "Oh, I've an evening spare, can I find a quick hook up", "Wife is in bed - can I find someone online to talk to me about my fantasies so I can have a quick wank"

I guess some questions are, for example, how long have you been looking?

and, also, where have you been looking?  Online only, or have you ventured into local events and meets?

I have been looking for about a year now. And i live in a very Vanilla town and if there is any munchies or anything like that i'd be all over it to get to know people like myself

[ey****]

well Tamworth has a munch - second Tuesday of the month - the Globe pub from 7.30pm this Tuesday

also, if you're near Birmingham then that opens a whole host of opportunities. 

[Deleted Member]

It's very easy to over think when you're single, try not too, it just makes you depressed and the whole process even harder because you start settling for much less than you need or deserve rather than be alone..I know, because I do it too, I've been single for longer than you have, but I'm at peace with it mostly,  despite occasional bouts of absolute frustration, which is what I think you're going through now.

Just keep being you, the right person will come along, I'm sure of it, don't try to change who you are, any guy would be lucky to have you, you're funny, enthusiastic, easy on the eye, fun, intelligent, and affectionate, not to mention kinky, and you most definitely are not too old! 

[Hexy]

1 hour ago, MsJax said:

It's very easy to over think when you're single, try not too, it just makes you depressed and the whole process even harder because you start settling for much less than you need or deserve rather than be alone..I know, because I do it too, I've been single for longer than you have, but I'm at peace with it mostly,  despite occasional bouts of absolute frustration, which is what I think you're going through now.

Just keep being you, the right person will come along, I'm sure of it, don't try to change who you are, any guy would be lucky to have you, you're funny, enthusiastic, easy on the eye, fun, intelligent, and affectionate, not to mention kinky, and you most definitely are not too old! 

Made me cry reading that, but i apreciate every last word. Thank you

[Hexy]

2 hours ago, eyemblacksheep said:

well Tamworth has a munch - second Tuesday of the month - the Globe pub from 7.30pm this Tuesday

also, if you're near Birmingham then that opens a whole host of opportunities. 

What is the etiquete to munchies? I doubt i can just turn up and everyones okay with it

[ey****]

32 minutes ago, HexThePup said:

What is the etiquete to munchies? I doubt i can just turn up and everyones okay with it

No - that's exactly what you CAN do.

Do yourself a quick google on what is a munch - but basically it's just a social gathering, meet-up, etc. in a vanilla setting.  It's usually advisable for newcomers to come closer to the start time as that way they can make themselves known to the organisers who can help make sure they're OK.

Whilst some munches do have a little bit more formality for strangers - most publicly advertised ones do not - and the Tamworth one also does not.

[3S****]

I do think spaces that focus on the sexual tend to attract mostly people only interested in sex,  i left most of those spaces when i didn't want to use people or be used sexually any more and actually only came back on here mostly to play the treasure hunt game because it was bringing me friends on here and was a way of introducing myself to people who wanted to talk. When i first came back i made a topic complaining about the lack of socialisation on sites like these and the staff/moderators? listened and did something to try and help make this place more social (the game for a start and a few other things), which was nice of them and did actually get me what i wanted if you read on.

So yeah munches are as good a place as any and you'll likely at least make friends if nothing else. I was happy to just make friends and stopped focusing on wanting a relationship eventually.

Did meet my partner on this site via the treasure hunt game though, which was a nice surprise (shouldn't really have been a surprise though because i sent out well over 1,000 toys lol). So even here it's not impossible, i just felt it was way more unlikely and it did take a lot of effort just to find a few friends tbh.

 

Wish you luck, we all deserve to give love and to feel loved.

Edited September 9, 2018 by 3SumQueen
forgot to wish OP luck

[Deleted Member]

1 hour ago, HexThePup said:

Made me cry reading that, but i apreciate every last word. Thank you

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you all emotional, but sometimes a really good sob makes you feel a whole lot better, I hope in this case it did x

[Ba****]

Don't settle Hex unfortunately in this life the pond is much smaller but there are people out there. Try and not let frustration get the better of you and be patient as tough as that can be sometimes. Hold out for someone who ticks your boxes and you don't have to compromise for