Swinger

Swing into swinging!

Swinging is another form of non-monogamy, though one that looks at the question from a very different perspective to polyamory. Swingers tend to be in serious, stable, primary relationships and have occasional sex with other people who are also in those relationships; the primary couple is considered the most important thing of all, and the theory behind the extra-marital sexual relationships is that they're 'a bit of fun' without too much romance or a lot of intense emotions. Of course, in practice swingers often form wonderfully intense bonds with their other partners; human connection is what it's all about, after all!

What is swinging?

Swingers enjoy swapping partners for sexual purposes. Swinging is no strings attached fun that often happens in swingers clubs or at parties held in private individuals homes.

How do I find a swinger club?

First check out the places here at Fetish.com! And look for swinging clubs in your area. You can also check other online searches too as most swingers clubs are now listed on the internet. You can also ask other swingers where they go, it’s always good to connect with other kinksters with the same interests as you.

Is swinging safe?

Yes, as long as all parties practise safe sex then swinging is just as safe as any sexual interaction. Always insist that condoms are used and make sure you get regular STI testing. If you’re adding a little spice to your swinging with dark rooms, restraints or blindfolds, make sure you trust everyone involved, so you know they will use condoms etc even if you can see them being put on.

Can singles go to swinger parties?

It is advisable to check the policy of the club you’re attending but singles are usually able to go to swingers events. Often single men pay more than couples or single women though, so this is something to bear in mind.

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For kinksters into polyamory

Polyamory, which translated means 'many loves', is a kind of open relationship in which people have more than one partner at a time. For many, these relationships are serious and ongoing, with a whole lot of love in them - after all, love is not a finite resource. It's not that people who consider themselves polyamorous don't feel jealousy or conflict, but that they choose to deal with those emotions in different ways - by dealing with them rather than by stamping out the cause of them. While many kinky people and fetishists are also polyamorous, polyamory isn't a fetish; it's a lifestyle choice and a relationship orientation.

For kinksters into free love

Originally, the 60s concept of 'free love' centred around the idea that monogamy was unnatural (especially for men) and that everyone should be free to act out their fantasies. This was a great idea, but it came with some drawbacks: for one thing it wasn't a feminist movement in the way we'd expect now, and for another it was mostly put to bed by the AIDS crisis. That's not to say that free love is dead - far from it! Swingers, polyamorists and non-monogamous folk of all types are still upholding the best of the principles of the original 1960s trailblazers - it's just that now we're doing it with more feminist ideals, awareness to sex-positivity and a much better understanding of safer sex.

Get the best out of a threesome

Probably the single topic most often raised in the magazine's agony column is threesomes. Whether they're your hottest fantasy, your weekly reality or something that you reckon would turn you right off, they're big news - and they certainly have plenty of fans! The trick to finding a threesome is not to force it - these things happen naturally, and you're unlikely to be able to engineer a situation with a stranger or online that works out to your satisfaction. The trick to enjoying one, on the other hand, is to make sure everyone's feeling included and to try and spend roughly as much time 'giving' as you spend 'getting'. This is a good rule of thumb no matter what kind of sex you're having, but when there's more than one other person involved it can be hugely beneficial to give it some conscious thought!