Is it wrong to open up?

[MandyPandi]

I had talk with mother. About why i have not been dating. Or why Im scared to date someone. The past relationship i have were bad and damaged me. Is what i told her. But truth was something more

The truth i wanted to tell her :
Because i was looked down by men i dated. I go into little space when stress and my mental health gets to me. They tell me to grow up and stop being child. I get told that if i now i dating them. They have full power over me and have the right to do what they want to. That they would beat the brat out of me. To were only word i can call them is “Master”


Is wrong to open up, scared that history might repeat its self. Is it okay if someone wants a broken me ?

[La****]

No. No. Its NEVER wrong to open up in relationship. It is even a must. Honesty and openness need to be the number one rule. Now, abt your question on ‘Is it wrong if someone wants to break you’ then the answer is on you. Is that what you want? Do you consent? Be careful and be mindful. BDSM and kink is a way for shitfucks to have more reason to justify ***. You say that you are little. Then whats important the most is someone that you will be completely, deeply trust—so you will be safe with them. Only when you feel deep trust and safe, the little in you will flourish and you will be brave to explore deeper. Thats the foundation of caregiver-little dynamic. Hell, its a foundation of any relationship. In fact that you need to worry abt this, meaning you dont actually feel safe with the person youre with. Your body and emotion responses already a clear answer enough. I hope you heal. Please put yourself first before anyone else.

[re****]

One day you will find the one guy that put you on a pedestal. Just can't give up. I've been used so many times it sucks

[La****]

1 minute ago, Lady_King said:

No. No. Its NEVER wrong to open up in relationship. It is even a must. Honesty and openness need to be the number one rule. Now, abt your question on ‘Is it wrong if someone wants to break you’ then the answer is on you. Is that what you want? Do you consent? Be careful and be mindful. BDSM and kink is a way for shitfucks to have more reason to justify ***. You say that you are little. Then whats important the most is someone that you will be completely, deeply trust—so you will be safe with them. Only when you feel deep trust and safe, the little in you will flourish and you will be brave to explore deeper. Thats the foundation of caregiver-little dynamic. Hell, its a foundation of any relationship. In fact that you need to worry abt this, meaning you dont actually feel safe with the person youre with. Your body and emotion responses already a clear answer enough. I hope you heal. Please put yourself first before anyone else.

**for shitfucks to justify @bu_se. Goddammit they censored the shit out of the word its not even readable.

[Tw****]

True, opening up and being honest and transparent in a relationship is what a relationship is supposed to be like, but it is scary as all hell. Because you are extremely *** of being hurt. You need to decide if you're willing to do that again and only you can decide how you want to be treated and how you will allow the man to treat you in your relationship.

[Jo****]

Well i have been through the same struggle once... It was during my College days... my first relationship i was honest with the girl and did everything to keep her happy but she was a player and later i realised it was her character to cheat and she did the same with many boys before then we broke up i was in a sad phase then i started exploring cuktures and lifestyle which led me to find the true self.. I realised my Dominant nature and started exploring BDSM remotely because of the country i live in doesn't support BDSM but happens discreetly but then i started exploring it online which worked for me and am still doing the same... hard without physical touch but remote BDSM has it's own beauty of controlling and committment and i am happy now ❤️ it's better being single and exploring your self than being with a wrong partner or end with a wrong person in Life... 💛

[mo****]

OMG, just the demands of being cold master and having no say in what ever kind of mindset you're in. That's ***! A real dominant will never do that. You're a person and they should always treat you like a person. These are big red flags, run and stand up for yourself. Safe words a must always. Límites and boundaries should and must be respected always. Vet the shit out of them.

[GreyHog]

There is a difference between "broken" and "traumatized". "Broken" means you need to be fixed; "traumatized" means you need to be cared for, listened to, and patiently healed. Find friends (even online) who may have similar histories and learn their methods of coping. Be well and reach out to those who can help.

[Deleted Member]

I'm so idk what chaos happened in the comments, but to get back to you (because the question was about you). I think that you should take the time to heal. F all the other noise if someone is tryna trap you into something you don't want. If you jump into a new relationship without healing, you might find yourself in the same position you were in before. You can be loved "broken", but know that "love" isn't limitless and it's an exchange no matter what people try to tell you. Because the second you don't "offer enough" to your partner, they will find someone else. With a divorce rate of 50% and raising no one can convince me otherwise. So ask yourself genuinely, what do you want from a relationship? What do you need from a relationship? What do you need to work on for yourself? But you don't need to ask yourself what you bring to the table because if it's not enough for them, thank you next. But there are plenty of men/women that will love you for yourself as an open book when you are ready to receive love.

[Mi****]

All of your precious relationships may not be the best for you. Let's call them a "learning experience."As my sub, you will learn how intense you can experience an orgasm.

[Ha****]

I want to share something with you that was once shared with me, and it changed everything: Consider going to therapy. I say this with all the love and care of an older sibling who genuinely wants the best for you.

I know it feels heavy right now, and it’s tempting to hope the feelings will just fade away on their own. But the truth is, they don’t. They follow you from one situation to the next, slowly chipping away at your sense of self each time.

You deserve the kind of healing that allows you to feel whole again. Leave the “breaking down” to the professionals who are trained to help you rebuild. Reaching out isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a sign of strength and self-love.

[gr****]

I would say it’s all about meeting the right person and don’t let people treat you anyway it a privilege for you to share n give yourself 2 some1

[De****]

It’s never wrong to open up, but take things slow. You will find the right person, but guard your heart until you do.

[FE****]

I have done some housekeeping on this thread and removed several comments that were completely innappropriate. Name calling is not cool, so let's play nice and stay on topic or your comments will be removed and further warnings given.

 

Thank you to those that stayed on topic.

[MandyPandi]

I just wanna thank everybody for giving me support. And I am looking. I’m not looking for one right away as I’m still learning more about myself day by day and getting to know the people. I think I know what I want and what I’m looking for to.

[no****]

Sweet, goodluck

[Wi****]

Hi Mandy.
If someone wants a broken you. In my personal opinion, they are broken

No one has a right to damage someone else and using BDSM as an excuse for pure evil is never acceptable.

I personally believe that No matter what the dynamics, the Dominant should help to subservient partner to become the very best version of themselves possible.

It sounds to me like someone was using you to vent their anger at the world and that is never OK

I suggest the same advice DenverBunny gave you.
Take your time and get to know the real person behind the mask.

Regardless of who we are and how we approach BDSM. We are all human.

This is of course my own opinion and how I conduct myself in life.

I can not speak for others.

[MandyPandi]

Again, I wanna thank everybody for thoughts and suggestions . I’ve taken a bunch of your guys suggestions. I’ve made an appointment for therapy to help me get through what I’ve been. And I’m gonna take time a long time to find out who I am and gained friends down that path. I think I’m gonna enjoy my walk around my new path and my new chapter of my life and meet new people. I think I’m enjoying my life right now in finding who I am and letting the parts of me heal.

[Ve****]

You're not broken, you're growing.

[ca****]

Not wrong and quite possibly exactly what 'can' work for you...... discuss it with as many people you are able to....   and the therapy is probably a good place to get some grounded opinion / advice.  

[It****]

What kinda guy ur dating tf

[Wi****]

20 hours ago, MandyPandi said:

Again, I wanna thank everybody for thoughts and suggestions . I’ve taken a bunch of your guys suggestions. I’ve made an appointment for therapy to help me get through what I’ve been. And I’m gonna take time a long time to find out who I am and gained friends down that path. I think I’m gonna enjoy my walk around my new path and my new chapter of my life and meet new people. I think I’m enjoying my life right now in finding who I am and letting the parts of me heal.

You go girl. Good for you. You got this no problem.

[Wi****]

20 hours ago, MandyPandi said:

Again, I wanna thank everybody for thoughts and suggestions . I’ve taken a bunch of your guys suggestions. I’ve made an appointment for therapy to help me get through what I’ve been. And I’m gonna take time a long time to find out who I am and gained friends down that path. I think I’m gonna enjoy my walk around my new path and my new chapter of my life and meet new people. I think I’m enjoying my life right now in finding who I am and letting the parts of me heal.

You go girl. You got this. Reach out and pick your destiny.

[Sa****]

You need to work on yourself before getting into this lifestyle. You will be taken advantage of and you won't even notice. Stay safe. Remember to love yourself first before loving anyone else. That is your first step.🙃

[No****]

❤️🩷